The Microsoft acquisition hoax is a bogus 1994 press release suggesting that the information technology company Microsoft had acquired the Roman Catholic Church. [1] [2]
The hoax comprises part of a cycle of "Microsoft jokes" in which Microsoft Corporation is portrayed as a wealthy but evil monopoly built on bloated or unreliable desktop software, planned obsolescence of products, corporate takeovers of once-innovative rivals, and litigiousness. While multiple books have been devoted to the subject, [3] [4] the jokes most commonly circulated online as Internet memes.
The hoax consisted of a press release, purportedly from the Associated Press, that circulated around the Internet in 1994. The press release claimed that Microsoft "will acquire the Roman Catholic Church in exchange for an unspecified number of shares of Microsoft common stock", and that the company expects "a lot of growth in the religious market in the next five to ten years... the combined resources of Microsoft and the Catholic Church will allow us to make religion easier and more fun for a broader range of people." [5]
Many of the press release's claims were unrealistic, from suggesting that Catholics would soon be able to take Holy Communion through their computer to claiming that conversion to Catholicism was an "upgrade". Despite these warning signs, several readers of the false press release contacted Microsoft to confirm the claims of the hoax, and on December 16, 1994, Microsoft formally debunked the claims. [1] [6]
Follow-up press releases made similarly outrageous claims—for example, one false press release claimed that IBM had acquired the Episcopal Church, and another suggested that the Italian television network RAI had invested in what the release claimed to be "Microsoft Corp.'s planned on-line computer service, the Microsoft Divine Network." [1] [7]
An Internet meme "Microsoft Acquires" spawned a series of similarly formatted mock press releases with an assortment of varying acquisition targets, including the government of the United States of America. According to the release, "United States citizens will be able to expect lower taxes, increases in government services, discounts on all Microsoft products and the immediate arrest of all executive officials of Sun Microsystems Inc. and Netscape Corp." [8] One meta-joke claimed that Microsoft ultimately put an end to the jokes by acquiring the phrase "Microsoft Acquires".
A hoax is a widely publicised falsehood created to deceive its audience with false and often astonishing information, with the either malicious or humorous intent of causing shock and interest in as many people as possible.
Novell, Inc. was an American software and services company headquartered in Provo, Utah, that existed from 1980 until 2014. Its most significant product was the multi-platform network operating system known as Novell NetWare. Novell technology contributed to the emergence of local area networks, which displaced the dominant mainframe computing model and changed computing worldwide.
The Bielefeld conspiracy is a satirical conspiracy theory that claims that the city of Bielefeld, Germany, does not exist, and is instead an illusion propagated by various forces to distract or mislead the German public. First posted on the German Usenet in 1994, the conspiracy has since been mentioned in the city's marketing, and alluded to in a speech by former Chancellor Angela Merkel.
Publicis Sapient is a digital consulting company belonging to Publicis Groupe, with 20,000 people and over 50 offices worldwide. It was originally established as Sapient in Cambridge, Massachusetts in 1990. In 2015, Sapient became an independent subsidiary of French multinational advertising firm Publicis, following a deal worth US$3.7 billion. It remains headquartered in Boston, Massachusetts, and as of February 2015, the leadership is retained.
Wingdings is a series of dingbat fonts that render letters as a variety of symbols. They were originally developed in 1990 by Microsoft by combining glyphs from Lucida Icons, Arrows, and Stars licensed from Charles Bigelow and Kris Holmes. Certain versions of the font's copyright string include attribution to Type Solutions, Inc., the maker of a tool used to hint the font.
Comic Sans MS is a sans-serif typeface created and designed by Vincent Connare and released by Microsoft Corporation in 1994. Designed as a non-connecting script, the typeface draws inspiration from comic book lettering, to emulate the informal and cartoonish tone of speech bubbles. It was originally developed for use in Microsofts software, and since then has become very widely recognized for its use in casual contexts such as children's books, personal documentation and in educational resources.
Intuit Inc. is an American multinational business software company that specializes in financial software. The company is headquartered in Mountain View, California, and the CEO is Sasan Goodarzi. Intuit's products include the tax preparation application TurboTax, the small business accounting program QuickBooks, the credit monitoring and personal accounting service Credit Karma, and email marketing platform Mailchimp. As of 2019, more than 95% of its revenues and earnings come from its activities within the United States.
The iLoo was a cancelled Microsoft project to develop a Wi-Fi Internet-enabled portable toilet. The iLoo, which was to debut at British summer festivals, was described as being a portable toilet with wireless broadband Internet, an adjustable plasma screen, a membrane wireless keyboard, a six-channel speaker system, and toilet paper embossed with popular web site addresses. The iLoo was also to have an extra screen and keyboard on the outside, and was to be guarded. It was intended as the next in a series of successful initiatives by MSN UK which sought to introduce the internet in unusual locations, including MSN Street, MSN Park Bench and MSN Deckchair.
The Catholic Church has been a subject for humor, from the time of the Reformation to the present day.
April Fools' Day or All Fools' Day is an annual custom on 1 April consisting of practical jokes and hoaxes. Jokesters often expose their actions by shouting "April Fools!" at the recipient. Mass media can be involved with these pranks, which may be revealed as such the following day. The custom of setting aside a day for playing harmless pranks upon one's neighbour has been relatively common in the world historically.
Laboratory Corporation of America Holdings (Labcorp), headquartered in Burlington, North Carolina, provides laboratory services used for diagnosis and healthcare decisions. It operates one of the largest clinical laboratory networks in the world and has operations in over 100 countries; although its operations are primarily in the U.S.
A media prank is a type of media event, perpetrated by staged speeches, activities, or press releases, designed to trick legitimate journalists into publishing erroneous or misleading articles. The term may also refer to such stories if planted by fake journalists, as well as the false story thereby published. A media prank is a form of culture jamming generally done as performance art or a practical joke for purposes of a humorous critique of mass media.
Fear, uncertainty, and doubt (FUD) is a manipulative propaganda tactic used in sales, marketing, public relations, politics, polling, and cults. FUD is generally a strategy to influence perception by disseminating negative and dubious or false information, and is a manifestation of the appeal to fear.
Hippo Eats Dwarf is the title of a hoax news article which claims that a dwarf was accidentally eaten by a hippopotamus. The urban legend has been circulating via the internet since the mid-1990s. Many print newspapers have been fooled into publishing the story as fact.
A Microsoft hoax may refer to:
The Ligma joke first gained popularity online in July 2018. "Ligma" sounds similar to the words "lick my", and became a sophomoric Internet meme to set up a crude joke. When someone unfamiliar with the term is prompted to ask "What's ligma?", the punchline is to respond with "Ligma balls", "Ligma nuts", "Ligma butt" or something similar.