Terri Conley

Last updated
Terri Conley
Born
United States
EducationPh.D.
Alma mater
  • University of Wisconsin-Madison
  • University of California, Los Angeles
Scientific career
FieldsSocial psychology
InstitutionsUniversity of Michigan

Terri Conley is an American social psychologist who studies gender differences in sexuality, consequences of departures from monogamy, and the consequences of masculinity threat. She is currently an associate professor of psychology and women's and gender studies at the University of Michigan, where she leads the Stigmatized Sexualities research lab. [1] [2]

Contents

Early life

Terri Conley was raised in the small town of Greenfield, Indiana, by her closeted lesbian mother. [3]

Education

Conley completed a BA in psychology and women's studies (honors degree, with distinction in psychology) at the University of Wisconsin–Madison in 1993, where she wrote two honors theses and worked in three different research labs. She then went on to earn her MA in social psychology at the University of California, Los Angeles in 1995. After receiving her MA, Conley got her Ph.D. in social psychology at the University of California, Los Angeles in 1999, where she also minored in health psychology and measurement and psychometrics. [1]

Career

Directly after receiving her Ph.D., Conley began her career working as a Social Science Research Council postdoctoral fellow from 2000 to 2002. She then went on to become an assistant professor of psychology at California State University–Northridge in 2003 and 2004. From 2004 to 2008, Conley worked as an assistant professor of psychology and women's studies at the University of Missouri at both the St. Louis and Kansas City campuses. In 2008, Conley became an assistant professor of psychology and women's studies at the University of Michigan. In 2013, continuing at the University of Michigan, Conley became an associate professor of psychology and women's and gender studies. She works in a joint program in women's studies and psychology, with a concentration in personality and social contexts. [1] Her three major lines of research include gender differences in sexuality, minority group members' perceptions of members in other groups, and the comparison between traditional monogamy and consensual non-monogamy. [4] Conley is the head of the Stigmatized Sexualities research lab at the University of Michigan.

Research

Conley's most notable contributions to the fields of social psychology and women's studies include demonstrating social factors that contribute to gender differences in sexuality (particularly, casual sex) and demonstrating that consensually non-monogamous relationships have similar (and sometimes superior) outcomes relative to monogamous relationships. One of Conley's studies [5] involves the replication of the 1989 Clark and Hatfield study [6] of casual sex offer acceptance. Conley has since conducted many more studies confirming her suspicions about the original Clark and Hatfield study. She has formulated an alternative explanation for why women are less likely to accept casual sex offers from a stranger. [7] Conley found that women were passing on sexual advances out of fear of being judged as promiscuous and doubt that a one-night stand with a new partner would be pleasurable. [3] She also discovered that regardless of gender, whoever was being approached with a casual sex offer was more "choosy", arguing against the assumption that women are the more selective gender. [7] When discussing her research, Conley says: "I like to look beyond conducting research that confirms existing stereotypes". [3] Although she enjoys this type of research, she also discusses the difficulties, remarking that "if you’re debunking stereotypes you have to do twice as much", and that "when you’re studying sexuality it’s really hard to be taken seriously". [3]

Motivations

When discussing her motivations for studying gender and sexuality, she mentioned how "it occurred to me that every single paper I wrote has someone it's trying to take down or someone I'm mad at. I have sort of an adversarial approach to science, which I actually think is very healthy for science". [3] Conley also describes the importance of the research she conducts, specifically in terms of consensual non-monogamy, mentioning that "anywhere in the US, an employer can say they're firing you because you're in a consensually non-monogamous relationship, and there's nothing you can do", citing that visibility and challenging stigmas will help move society in the right direction. [8] Conley's main objective in researching sexuality is to eliminate stigmas surrounding the subject by conducting research that questions societal norms.

Gender differences in sexuality

Conley and colleagues have demonstrated that two of the main reasons women are less likely to accept heterosexual casual sex offers than men are: a) women are stigmatized to a greater extent than men are for participating in casual sex, and b) women anticipate [9] that they will receive less sexual pleasure in the encounter than men do.

In Conley's study [5] replicating Clark and Hatfield's 1989 study [6] mentioned above, she found evidence that negates the gender differences asserted in the original study. Conley found that proposers of casual sex who were men (toward women) were "uniformly seen as less desirable than female sexual proposers", [5] proving that the gender differences found in Clark and Hatfield's study have more to do with the gender of the proposer than of the study participant. She also found that the only consistent predictor of acceptance of casual sex for both men and women is perceived sexual capabilities, showing that the lower acceptance of casual sex offers by women found in Clark and Hatfield's study had more to do with their perception of the proposer's ability to be good in bed, and less to do with the study participant's gender.

In another study, [10] Conley and her associates Ziegler and Moors found more proof that the gender differences asserted by researchers and social norms have less to do with inherent gender differences, and more to do with backlash effects and sexual double standards imposed on women by society. Conley et al. [10] found that the stigma associated with women having casual sex can often decrease the likelihood that they accept casual sex offers. Although casual sex can often be stigmatized for men and women, Conley et al. found that women were "more strongly influenced by fear and stigma". [10]

Much of Conley's research supports pleasure theory, which Conley describes as the idea that "the pursuit of pleasure is the central force that motivates sexual behavior" for both men and women. [11] This theory comes from the large pleasure gap in sexual encounters between men and women, where men can expect to have a pleasurable time in most sexual encounters, where women will not always experience pleasure. As previously discussed above, Conley found that the differences found in the 1989 Clark and Hatfield study had more to do with “women’s perception that their heterosexual casual sex partners will be unlikely to give them pleasure”, than gender differences in casual sex interest. [11] She also conducted research on bisexual women that showed this to be true - these bisexual women were far more likely to accept a casual sex offer from a woman than a man, due to their perceived ability to pleasure the participant. [11]

Relatedly, Conley has investigated the role that orgasm plays in reactions to casual sex. Piemonte, Conley & Gusakova (2019), found that, despite stereotypes of women being less satisfied and more distressed by their casual sex experiences than men, gender differences in response to casual sex encounters evaporate when controlling for whether the participant had an orgasm during the casual sex encounter. [12]

Monogamy and its alternatives

In her research on monogamy and its alternatives, Conley demonstrated that, despite widespread acceptance of the notion that monogamous relationships are superior to other non-monogamous arrangements, scant evidence exists in support of this supposition. [3] Conley calls this phenomenon of seeing monogamy as preferable and inherently better than consensual non-monogamy a 'halo effect". [13] [14] When asked to describe it, Conley defines consensual non-monogamy as "a relational arrangement in which partners agree that it is acceptable to have more than one sexual and/or romantic relationship at the same time". [15]

In conducting research on consensually non-monogamous relationships, Conley found that people in consensually non-monogamous (CNM) relationships are more likely to use condoms and use them more correctly than monogamous people who are secretly cheating on their partner. [3] Conley's research demonstrates that monogamy may not be as protective against sexually transmitted infections as would be expected, given that people in CNM relationships are much more likely to practice safer sex. [16] Likewise, people in certain types of CNM relationships report higher levels of relational adjustment than those in monogamous relationships. [17] Sexual satisfaction of those in some types of CNM relationships is also higher than that of individuals in monogamous relationships. [18]

Discussing the act of researching non-monogamy, Conley describes how she is perceived as a worse scientist because she conducts research that does not confirm stereotypes, and that researchers that do support popular stereotypes are perceived as less biased and better scientists. [8] She also describes how she is perceived as having a connection to the consensually non-monogamous community because of her research, or that she "just want[s] everyone to be polyamorous", due to the fact that she conducted research that had positive findings about non-monogamy. [8]

Related Research Articles

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Human sexual activity</span> Manner in which humans engage sexually

Human sexual activity, human sexual practice or human sexual behaviour is the manner in which humans experience and express their sexuality. People engage in a variety of sexual acts, ranging from activities done alone to acts with another person in varying patterns of frequency, for a wide variety of reasons. Sexual activity usually results in sexual arousal and physiological changes in the aroused person, some of which are pronounced while others are more subtle. Sexual activity may also include conduct and activities which are intended to arouse the sexual interest of another or enhance the sex life of another, such as strategies to find or attract partners, or personal interactions between individuals. Sexual activity may follow sexual arousal.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Polyamory</span> Intimacy for multiple partners

Polyamory is the practice of, or desire for, romantic relationships with more than one partner at the same time, with the informed consent of all partners involved. People who identify as polyamorous may believe in open relationships with a conscious management of jealousy and reject the view that sexual and relational exclusivity (monogamy) are prerequisite for deep, committed, long-term, loving relationships. Others prefer to restrict their sexual activity to only members of the group, a closed polyamorous relationship that is usually referred to as polyfidelity.

Promiscuity is the practice of engaging in sexual activity frequently with different partners or being indiscriminate in the choice of sexual partners. The term can carry a moral judgment. A common example of behavior viewed as promiscuous by many cultures is the one-night stand, and its frequency is used by researchers as a marker for promiscuity.

Swinging, sometimes called wife-swapping, husband-swapping, or partner-swapping, is a sexual activity in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship sexually engage with others for recreational purposes. Swinging is a form of non-monogamy and is an open relationship. People may choose a swinging lifestyle for a variety of reasons. Practitioners cite an increased quality and quantity of sex. Some people may engage in swinging to add variety into their otherwise conventional sex-lives or due to their curiosity. Some couples see swinging as a healthy outlet and means to strengthen their relationship.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Infidelity</span> Cheating, adultery, or having an affair

Infidelity is a violation of a couple's emotional and/or sexual exclusivity that commonly results in feelings of anger, sexual jealousy, and rivalry.

Open marriage is a form of non-monogamy in which the partners of a dyadic marriage agree that each may engage in extramarital sexual or romantic relationships, without this being regarded by them as infidelity, and consider or establish an open relationship despite the implied monogamy of marriage. There are variant forms of open marriage such as swinging and polyamory, each with the partners having varying levels of input into their spouse's activities.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Premarital sex</span> Sexual activity before marriage

Premarital sex is sexual activity which is practiced by people before they are married. Premarital sex is considered a sin by a number of religions and also considered a moral issue which is taboo in many cultures. Since the Sexual Revolution of the 1960s, it has become accepted by certain liberal movements, especially in Western countries. A 2014 Pew study on global morality found that premarital sex was considered particularly unacceptable in "Muslim Majority Countries", such as Malaysia, Jordan and Pakistan, each having over 90% disapproval, while people in Western European countries were the most accepting, with Spain, Germany, and France expressing less than 10% disapproval.

An open relationship is an intimate relationship that is sexually non-monogamous. The term is distinct from polyamory, in that it generally indicates a relationship where there is a primary emotional and intimate relationship between two partners, who agree to at least the possibility of sexual or emotional intimacy with other people.

Sociosexuality, sometimes called sociosexual orientation, is the individual difference in the willingness to engage in sexual activity outside of a committed relationship. Individuals who are more restricted sociosexually are less willing to engage in casual sex; they prefer greater love, commitment and emotional closeness before having sex with romantic partners. Individuals who are more unrestricted sociosexually are more willing to have casual sex and are more comfortable engaging in sex without love, commitment or closeness.

Dorothy "Dossie" Easton, who has also written under the name Scarlet Woman, is an American author and family therapist based in San Francisco, California. She is polyamorous and lives in West Marin, California.

Casual sex is sexual activity that takes place outside a romantic relationship and implies an absence of commitment, emotional attachment, or familiarity between sexual partners. Examples are sexual activity while casually dating, one-night stands, prostitution or swinging.

Non-monogamy is an umbrella term for every practice or philosophy of non-dyadic intimate relationship that does not strictly hew to the standards of monogamy, particularly that of having only one person with whom to exchange sex, love, and/or affection. In that sense, "nonmonogamy" may be accurately applied to extramarital sex, group marriage, or polyamory. It is not synonymous with infidelity, since all parties are consenting to the relationship structure, partners are often committed to each other as well as to their other partners and cheating is still considered problematic behavior with many non-monogamous relationships.

Fat fetishism or adipophilia is a sexual attraction directed towards overweight or obese people due primarily to their weight and size.

Monogamous pairing in animals refers to the natural history of mating systems in which species pair bond to raise offspring. This is associated, usually implicitly, with sexual monogamy.

Monogamy is a dyadic relationship in which two members of a group form an exclusive intimate partnership. Having only one partner at any one time, whether that be for life or whether that be serial monogamy, contrasts with various forms of non-monogamy. More generally, the term is used to describe the behavioral ecology and sexual selection of animal mating systems, referring to the state of having only one mate at any one given time. In a human cultural context, monogamy typically refers to the custom of two individuals, regardless of orientation, committing to a sexually exclusive relationship.

Hookup culture is one that accepts and encourages casual sex encounters, including one-night stands and other related activity, without necessarily including emotional intimacy, bonding or a committed relationship. It is generally associated with Western late adolescent sexuality and, in particular, United States college culture. The term hookup has an ambiguous definition because it can indicate kissing or any form of physical sexual activity between sexual partners. The term has been widely used in the U.S. since at least 2000. It has also been called nonrelationship sex, or sex without dating.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Meg-John Barker</span> British writer and independent scholar

Meg-John Barker is a writer, writing mentor, creative consultant, speaker, and independent scholar. They have written a number of anti self-help books on the topics of relationships, sex, and gender, as well as the graphic non-fiction books, Queer: A Graphic History and Gender: A Graphic Guide, and the book The Psychology of Sex. They are the writer of the relationships book and blog Rewriting the Rules, and they have a podcast with sex educator Justin Hancock.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Justin Lehmiller</span> American social psychologist and author

Justin J. Lehmiller is an American social psychologist and author. He is a research fellow at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University.

Consensual non-monogamy (CNM), and its subset ethical non-monogamy (ENM), are the practice of non-monogamous intimate or sexual relations that are distinguished from infidelity by the knowledge and consent of those involved, and from polygamy by the various partners not being in a single marriage. Forms of consensual non-monogamy include swinging, polyamory, open relationships, cuckquean fetishism and cuckolding fetishism.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Queerplatonic relationship</span> Non-romantic intimate partnerships

Queerplatonic relationships (QPR) and queerplatonic partnerships (QPP) are committed intimate relationships which are not romantic in nature. They may differ from usual close friendships by having more explicit commitment, validation, status, structure, and norms, similar to a conventional romantic relationship. The concept originates in aromantic and asexual spaces in the LGBT community. Like romantic relationships, queerplatonic relationships are sometimes said to involve a deeper and more profound emotional connection than typical friendship.

References

  1. 1 2 3 "Terri Conley | U-M LSA Department of Psychology". lsa.umich.edu. Retrieved 2019-10-02.
  2. "Terri Conley | HuffPost". www.huffpost.com. Retrieved 2019-10-07.
  3. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 "Meet Terri Conley: The Psychologist With an Alternative Theory of Hookup Culture". The Cut. Retrieved 2019-10-16.
  4. "Dr. Terri Conley: Changing the Way We Think About Monogamy | U-M LSA Department of Psychology". lsa.umich.edu. Retrieved 2019-10-02.
  5. 1 2 3 Conley, Terri (2011). "Perceived proposer personality characteristics and gender differences in acceptance of casual sex offers". Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. 100 (2): 309–329. doi:10.1037/a0022152. PMID   21171789.
  6. 1 2 Clark, Russell; Hatfield, Elaine (1989). "Gender difference in receptivity to sexual offers". International Journal of Sexual Health. 2: 39–55 via PsycINFO.
  7. 1 2 Conley, Terri D.; Moors, Amy C.; Matsick, Jes L.; Ziegler, Ali; Valentine, Brandon A. (2011). "Women, Men, and the Bedroom: Methodological and Conceptual Insights That Narrow, Reframe, and Eliminate Gender Differences in Sexuality". Current Directions in Psychological Science. 20 (5): 296–300. doi:10.1177/0963721411418467. ISSN   0963-7214. JSTOR   23045742. S2CID   109937245.
  8. 1 2 3 Tierney, Allison (2017-03-30). "Why We Need to Challenge the Culture of Monogamy". Vice. Retrieved 2019-10-16.
  9. Armstrong, Elizabeth; England, Paula; Fogarty, Alison (2012). "Accounting for women's orgasm and sexual enjoyment in college hookups and relationships". American Sociological Review. 77 (3): 435–462. doi:10.1177/0003122412445802. S2CID   146476877.
  10. 1 2 3 Conley, Terri; Ziegler, Ali; Moors, Amy (2013). "Backlash from the bedroom: Stigma mediates gender differences in acceptance of casual sex offers". Psychology of Women Quarterly. 37: 392–407. doi:10.1177/0361684312467169. S2CID   145571081.
  11. 1 2 3 Jacobs, Tom. "Women Enjoy Casual Sex, Really". Pacific Standard. Retrieved 2019-10-16.
  12. Piemonte, Jennifer; Conley, Terri; Gusakova, Staci (2019). "Orgasm, gender, and responses to heterosexual casual sex". Personality and Individual Differences. 151: 109487. doi:10.1016/j.paid.2019.06.030. S2CID   202289853.
  13. Reporter, Camy Metwally Daily Staff (12 February 2016). "Sexpertise speakers address popular myths on sexual behaviors". The Michigan Daily. Retrieved 2019-10-16.
  14. Conley, Terri; Perry, Morgan; Gusakova, Staci; Piemonte, Jennifer (2019). "Monogamous halo effects: The stigma of non-monogamy within collective sex environments". Archives of Sexual Behavior. 48 (1): 31–34. doi:10.1007/s10508-018-1213-8. PMID   29796718. S2CID   44120299.
  15. Baer, Drake (2017-03-06). "Maybe Monogamy Isn't the Only Way to Love". The Cut. Retrieved 2019-10-16.
  16. Conley, Terri; Moors, Amy; Ziegler, Ali; Karathanasis, Constantina (2012). "Unfaithful individuals are less likely to practice safer sex than openly non-monogamous individuals". Journal of Sexual Medicine. 9 (6): 1559–1565. doi:10.1111/j.1743-6109.2012.02712.x. hdl: 2027.42/92140 . PMID   22463058.
  17. Conley, Terri; Matsick, Jes; Moors, Amy; Ziegler, Ali (2017). "Investigation of consensually non-monogamous relationships: Theories, methods, and new directions". Perspectives on Psychological Science. 12 (2): 205–232. doi:10.1177/1745691616667925. PMID   28346120. S2CID   42335999.
  18. Conley, Terri; Piemonte, Jennifer; Gusakova, Staci; Rubin, Jennifer (2018). "Sexual satisfaction among individuals in monogamous and consensually non-monogamous relationships". Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. 35 (4): 509–531. doi:10.1177/0265407517743078. S2CID   148605989.