The act of placing visitation stones is significant in Jewish bereavement practices. Small stones are placed by people who visit Jewish graves in an act of remembrance or respect for the deceased. The practice is a way of participating in the mitzvah of burial. It is customary to place the stone with the left hand. [1]
Marking a grave with stones was customary in Biblical times before the adoption of gravestones. [2] [1] The oldest graves in the Old Cemetery in Safed are piles of rocks with a more prominent rock bearing an inscription. [1]
It is not customary in Judaism to leave flowers at a grave after visiting. It is believed to be more appropriate to give money to charity that could otherwise be spent on flowers. [3] In addition – cut flowers eventually die, but stones are enduring and do not die. [4]
Formerly the tradition might have been to insert notes into crevices in the grave marker. This tradition may be related to the practice of placing notes in the Western Wall in Jerusalem. Letters may have been formerly written to the deceased and held down by a stone; the stone would have been left after the paper blew away. [3]
The tradition has also been noted outside of Jewish mourning practices; Robert MacFarlane notes the presence of stones placed by mourners in the alcoves of the recesses of resting stones in ancient Ireland. [2]
Various explanations have been given for the origin of the practice [1]
Sukkot is a Torah-commanded holiday celebrated for seven days, beginning on the 15th day of the month of Tishrei. It is one of the Three Pilgrimage Festivals on which Israelites were commanded to make a pilgrimage to the Temple in Jerusalem. Originally a harvest festival celebrating the autumn harvest, Sukkot’s modern observance is characterized by festive meals in a sukkah, a temporary wood-covered hut, celebrating the Exodus from Egypt.
Shiva is the week-long mourning period in Judaism for first-degree relatives. The ritual is referred to as "sitting shiva" in English. The shiva period lasts for seven days following the burial. Following the initial period of despair and lamentation immediately after the death, shiva embraces a time when individuals discuss their loss and accept the comfort of others.
A bar mitzvah (masc.) or bat mitzvah (fem.) is a coming-of-age ritual in Judaism. According to Jewish law, before children reach a certain age, the parents are responsible for their child's actions. Once Jewish children reach that age, they are said to "become" b'nai mitzvah, at which point they begin to be held accountable for their own actions. Traditionally, the father of a bar or bat mitzvah offers thanks to God that he is no longer punished for his child's sins.
A tallit is a fringed garment worn as a prayer shawl by religious Jews. The tallit has special twined and knotted fringes known as tzitzit attached to its four corners. The cloth part is known as the beged ("garment") and is usually made from wool or cotton, although silk is sometimes used for a tallit gadol.
Chabad, also known as Lubavitch, Habad and Chabad-Lubavitch, is an Orthodox Jewish Hasidic dynasty. Chabad is one of the world's best-known Hasidic movements. It is one of the largest Hasidic groups as well as one of the largest Jewish religious organizations in the world. Unlike most Haredi groups, which are self-segregating, Chabad mainly operates in the wider world and it caters to secularized Jews.
A mezuzah is a piece of parchment inscribed with specific Hebrew verses from the Torah, which Jewish followers of Rabbinical Judaism fix to the doorposts of their homes. These verses are the Biblical passages in which the use of a mezuzah is commanded ; they also form part of the Shema prayer.
Tzedakah is a Hebrew word meaning "righteousness", but commonly used to signify charity. This concept of "charity" differs from the modern Western understanding of "charity". The latter is typically understood as a spontaneous act of goodwill and a marker of generosity; tzedakah is an ethical obligation, and it is not properly "charity", like in Christiandom, but a way to empower poor people to support themselves, helping them in developing their talents and skills.
A headstone, tombstone, or gravestone is a stele or marker, usually stone, that is placed over a grave. It is traditional for burials in the Christian, Jewish, and Muslim religions, among others. In most cases, it has the deceased's name, date of birth, and date of death inscribed on it, along with a personal message, or prayer, but may contain pieces of funerary art, especially details in stone relief. In many parts of Europe, insetting a photograph of the deceased in a frame is very common.
The term chevra kadisha gained its modern sense of "burial society" in the nineteenth century. It is an organization of Jewish men and women who see to it that the bodies of deceased Jews are prepared for burial according to Jewish tradition and are protected from desecration, willful or not, until burial. Two of the main requirements are the showing of proper respect for a corpse, and the ritual cleansing of the body and subsequent dressing for burial. It is usually referred to as a burial society in English.
Bereavement in Judaism is a combination of minhag (traditions) and mitzvah (commandments) derived from the Torah and Judaism's classical rabbinic literature. The details of observance and practice vary according to each Jewish community.
The Priestly Blessing or priestly benediction, also known in rabbinic literature as raising of the hands, rising to the platform, dukhenen, or duchening, is a Hebrew prayer recited by Kohanim. The text of the blessing is found in Numbers 6:23–27.
Seudah shlishit or shaleshudes is the third meal customarily eaten by Sabbath-observing Jews on each Shabbat. Both names refer to the third of the three meals a Jew is obligated to eat on Shabbat according to the Talmud.
A Jewish cemetery is a cemetery where Jews are buried in keeping with Jewish tradition. Cemeteries are referred to in several different ways in Hebrew, including beit kevarot, beit almin or beit olam [haba],, the beit chayyim and beit shalom.
Orthodox Jewish outreach, often referred to as Kiruv or Qiruv, is the collective work or movement of Orthodox Judaism that reaches out to non-observant Jews to encourage belief in God and life according to Jewish law. The process of a Jew becoming more observant of Orthodox Judaism is called teshuva making the "returnee" a baal teshuva. Orthodox Jewish outreach has worked to enhance the rise of the baal teshuva movement.
An adult bar/bat mitzvah is a bar or bat mitzvah of a person older than the customary age. Traditionally, a bar or bat mitzvah occurs at age 13 for boys and 12 for girls. Many adult Jews who have never had a bar or bat mitzvah, however, may choose to have one later in life, and many who have had one at the traditional age choose to have a second. An adult bar or bat mitzvah can be held at any age after adulthood is reached and can be performed in a variety of ways.
Chabad customs and holidays are the practices, rituals and holidays performed and celebrated by adherents of the Chabad-Lubavitch Hasidic movement. The customs, or minhagim and prayer services are based on Lurianic kabbalah. The holidays are celebrations of events in Chabad history. General Chabad customs, called minhagim, distinguish the movement from other Hasidic groups.
Dirah betachtonim, is a significant theological concept in Chabad philosophy describing the ultimate desire of God as relating to the manifestation of the divine presence within the material world.
Happiness in Judaism and Jewish thought is considered an important value, especially in the context of the service of God. A number of Jewish teachings stress the importance of joy, and demonstrate methods of attaining happiness.
Coins for the dead is a form of respect for the dead or bereavement. The practice began in classical antiquity when people believed the dead needed coins to pay a ferryman to cross the river Styx. In modern times the practice has been observed in the United States and Canada: visitors leave coins on the gravestones of former military personnel.
Media related to Pebbles on Jewish gravestones at Wikimedia Commons