Acorn Antiques is a parodic soap opera written by British comedian Victoria Wood as a regular feature in the two series of Victoria Wood: As Seen on TV , which ran from 1985 to 1987. Wood later adapted the concept into a musical, which opened in 2005.
Wood originally wrote Acorn Antiques as a weekly slot in her sketch shows Victoria Wood: As Seen on TV . She based it on the long-running ATV/Central serial Crossroads (1964-1988), and BBC radio soap Waggoners' Walk (1969-1980). [1] [2]
Its premise — the lives and loves of the staff of an antiques shop in the fictional English town of Manchesterford — hardly reflects the ambitious and implausible storylines, which lampooned the staples of soap operas: love triangles, amnesiacs, sudden deaths and reunited siblings. The banal dialogue frequently includes clumsy references to storylines, for example "It is quiet in here. Anyone would think you was discussing million-pound legacies or something."
It also satirised the shortcomings of long-running dramas produced on small budgets with its small artificial-looking set, missed cues, crude camera work and hasty scripts. A lack of continuity is seen in distinct lapses where storylines are introduced and dropped between episodes and character development is forgotten. One episode, for example, is introduced as reflecting the current interest in health fads with a plot where the antiques shop is merged into a "Leisure centre and sunbed centre", never to be mentioned again. This storyline also reflected changes in the Crossroads storyline in the mid-1980s as a leisure centre opened at the motel where the serial was set.
The deliberately haphazard opening and end credits, together with its tinny title music, also lampooned Crossroads. The opening sequence was updated for the second series, with a reworking of the theme tune and shots of Miss Babs, one of the leading characters, driving to Acorn Antiques in the firm's van. This too was a parody of the new mid-80s Crossroads opening theme and titles sequences at the time, complete with the use of vertical blinds to reveal the show's title as the blinds closed (naturally, the Acorn Antiques version did not work and had to be pushed by a stagehand). The end credits referred to "Victoria Woods" [sic].
Perhaps the most comical element of Acorn Antiques were the missed cues, harking back to the days when Crossroads was recorded live. Fictional floor managers and directors can be heard prompting the dreadful actors to say their lines, whilst the end of several scenes show the actors not quite knowing what to do with themselves with the camera still rolling.
References to other daytime television devices featured; after one episode a continuity announcer mentions an exhibition of costumes from the show touring several British towns, and after another episode a range of novelisations is mentioned (bearing such archetypical purple titles as A Waning Moon, and little resemblance to screened storylines). The announcement that the show's theme tune was available to buy as Anyone Can Break a Vase sung by Miss Babs, was a reference to the release of Anyone Can Fall in Love, based on the EastEnders theme and sung by one of its cast members, Anita Dobson.
Wood also created a spoof arts documentary about the show for her As Seen on TV special, in keeping with similar straight-faced "behind the scenes" shows produced about soap operas, which reveals the shambolic Acorn Antiques production, and interviews the self-obsessed fictional actors behind the fictional characters. At one point, when an obvious continuity error is pointed out, the hard-nosed producer "Marion Clune" (played by Maggie Steed) sums up the directorial attitude: "We professionals notice - Joe Public never clocks a damn thing." The documentary also depicts the actress portraying the drudge Mrs. Overall as being an archetypal soap diva called Bo Beaumont (although in the series the fictional end titles credit Julie Walters as Mrs Overall).
In the final show of Victoria Wood: As Seen on TV a sketch was shown where the actors playing Mrs Overall and Mr Clifford are supposedly axed from the soap and Bo Beaumont (Walters) breezes out of the studio (in a parody of Noele Gordon's firing from Crossroads), complaining to the TV news crew outside "Does a faithful dog expect to be kicked? That show was my life."
The sketches even led to a fanzine and appreciation gatherings where fans would dress up as the characters. [3] In 2004, in a poll on its website, Channel 4 voted Acorn Antiques the 7th best comedy sketch of all time. [4]
The show made a brief return to television in 1992 in Victoria Wood's All Day Breakfast, her satire on daytime television. [5] A sketch of its soap, The Mall, ends with Mrs Overall returning to reopen Acorn Antiques, mentioning that the other principal characters had been killed in a bus crash (even though she herself had been killed off in the final episode of the original series). A special one-off episode was broadcast in 1996 in a programme to commemorate sixty years of BBC Television. One final sketch was shown in 2001 with the original cast and Nick Frost as an armed robber (as part of Wood's History of Sketch Comedy BBC1 series). [6]
| DVD Title | As Seen On TV Show | Description |
|---|---|---|
| Think On and Look Sharp | Series 1, Episode 1 | Things come in threes: one death, one break up, and one coffee without a sweetener. |
| Shot in Dakar | Series 1, Episode 2 | Shop co-owner Berta returns from intensive care to find that her father is still alive. |
| Trixie Trouble | Series 1, Episode 3 | Shop worker Trixie causes trouble when she finds out that she is Babs' daughter. |
| Cousin Jerez | Series 1, Episode 4 | Cousin Jerez sparks a suspicious interest in Acorn Antiques. |
| Muesli | Series 1, Episode 5 | Clifford reveals that he and Berta are married. |
| Twins | Series 1, Episode 6 | Mrs Overall finds out that she is mother of both Derek and Miss Berta. |
| DVD Title | As Seen On TV Show | Description |
|---|---|---|
| Up For Sale | Series 2, Episode 1 | Miss Babs decides to put Acorn Antiques up for sale. |
| All's Well That Ends Well | Series 2, Episode 2 | Mrs Overall reveals that she never posted the letter to the estate agent. |
| Drastic Refurbishment | Series 2, Episode 3 | The shop begins its refurbishment. |
| Health and Fitness | Series 2, Episode 4 | Acorn Antiques is turned into a Leisure Centre. |
| Shocking News | Series 2, Episode 5 | Clifford reveals a secret about him and Derek. |
| The Final Performance | Series 2, Episode 6 | Mrs Overall and Clifford die. |
In 2005 Victoria Wood created a comedy musical version. Julie Walters, Celia Imrie and Duncan Preston returned to their original roles with Sally Ann Triplett replacing Wood as Berta, who alternated with Walters as Mrs Overall. Josie Lawrence and Neil Morrissey appeared as new characters. Its original run, directed by Trevor Nunn, had a sellout season in London's West End. It earned several Olivier Award nominations, with Celia Imrie winning Best Supporting Actress in a Musical. It was revived for a tour in 2007, directed this time by Victoria Wood herself.
It tells the backstage story of the Acorn Antiques actors (as seen in The Making of Acorn Antiques) reuniting for a gritty stage reboot of the soap. In the musical within the musical Babs, Berta and Mrs Overall battle a corporate buyout from the head of an international coffee chain. Their fortunes change when Miss Bonnie, played by Josie Lawrence, is discovered to be their sister, and Mrs Overall their mother. As with the original TV series the musical is presented as derivative and amateurish; missed cues, chaotic choreography and jarring tone changes blight a production that parodies set pieces from its genre, notably Blood Brothers , Chicago and Les Miserables .
Several amateur productions have been staged in the last decade. Crescent Theatre in Birmingham presented the premiere of the first in May 2010, followed by The Leighton Masqueraders later that year. Richard and Thomas Ayre are listed as lighting operators, and Victoria Wood attended the opening night. Wigston Amateur Operatic Society put on their production of the show in May 2016 at The Little Theatre in Leicester. [7]
A DVD containing Acorn Antiques as a full-length individual release was made available in a 20th Anniversary Collection on 7 February 2005. [11] This was the first time that the extras played by Albert Welch and Michaela Welch were given an on-screen credit.
Acorn Antiques was released as part of the complete series of Victoria Wood: As Seen on TV on 2 April 2007. [12]
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