Julie Sondra Decker (born January 17, 1978), also known by her YouTube name "swankivy", [1] is an American writer, YouTuber, and activist known for her work on asexuality. She is particularly noted for a 2014 book on the subject, The Invisible Orientation.
Decker was born in New Jersey on January 17, 1978. [2] She mentions on her website that she started reading from an early age and has wanted to become an author since she was six years old. She attended and later graduated from the University of Florida in 2000. [3] She grew up in a family where her sisters were supportive of her and in which "alternative lifestyles" were considered acceptable. [4]
Decker experimented with her sexuality in high school and found that she was generally uninterested in dating. [4] Decker realized she was both asexual and aromantic when she was 14. [5] When Decker was 19, she was sexually assaulted by a male friend who felt he could "fix" her asexuality. [6] She eventually repelled him, and as she was leaving, he yelled out, "I just want to help you!" [5] Before the Asexuality Visibility and Education Network (AVEN) was founded, Decker had described herself as nonsexual, but today uses the term asexual. [7]
Decker lives and works in her hometown of Tampa, Florida. [8] Decker feels that it is important to speak for "asexuals who are insecure or depressed." [4]
Decker joined YouTube on September 26, 2006. Her earliest video uploaded is "SwankiVY sings "Popular" from Wicked" which was uploaded on 15 March 2008. Although she vlogs about many subjects, she is well known for her series "Letters To An Asexual" where she replies (usually in a sarcastic manner) to derogatory comments directed towards her or the asexual community. She is also known to cover songs from musicals on her channel such as Wicked but has also covered songs from Bat For Lashes, Tears For Fears and Smile.dk. [9] She also has an additional account simply titled "JulieSondra" where she shares writing tips for struggling writers. [10]
In 2014, Decker released The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality. Library Journal wrote that The Invisible Orientation is "the first substantial book for the nonprofessional to emerge from the small but growing community of individuals who identify themselves as 'asexual,'" and called the book an important resource for understanding asexuality. [11] Maclean's describes the book as using "plain, straightforward language" and helps readers understand various manifestations of asexuality. [4] The book contains a variety of resources and information regarding asexuality and the misunderstanding that the asexual community faces in modern society. [12] Decker includes a section for those who are trying to figure out if they are actually asexual or not. [12] The book was later nominated for best LGBT Non-Fiction book award at the 27th Lambda Literary Awards. [13] In 2015, Invisible Orientation won a silver IPPY award in the category of sexuality and relationships. [14] Decker says that she wants the book to help change the "common narrative about what sexuality is." [15]
Romantic orientation, also called affectional orientation, is the classification of the sex or gender which a person experiences romantic attraction towards or is likely to have a romantic relationship with. The term is used alongside the term "sexual orientation", as well as being used alternatively to it, based upon the perspective that sexual attraction is only a single component of a larger concept.
Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in or desire for sexual activity. It may be considered a sexual orientation or the lack thereof. It may also be categorized more widely, to include a broad spectrum of asexual sub-identities.
Platonic love is a type of love in which sexual desire or romantic features are nonexistent or have been suppressed, sublimated, or purgated, but it means more than simple friendship.
Bisexual erasure, also called bisexual invisibility, is the tendency to ignore, remove, falsify, or re-explain evidence of bisexuality in history, academia, the news media, and other primary sources.
The ace of hearts (A♥) is a card in a deck of playing cards: the ace in the suit of hearts (♥). There is one ace of hearts in a standard deck of 52 cards.
Demisexuality is a sexual orientation in which an individual does not experience primary sexual attraction – the type of attraction that is based on immediately observable characteristics such as appearance or smell and is experienced immediately after a first encounter. A demisexual person can only experience secondary sexual attraction – the type of attraction that occurs after the development of an emotional bond. The amount of time that a demisexual individual needs to know another person before developing sexual attraction towards them varies from person to person. Demisexuality is generally categorized on the asexuality spectrum.
Nina Revoyr is an American novelist and children's advocate, best known for her award-winning 2003 novel Southland. She is also executive vice president and chief operating officer of Children's Institute, Inc., which provides clinical, youth development, family support and early childhood services to children and families affected by trauma, violence and poverty in Central and South Los Angeles.
The Sexual Brain is a 1993 book about brain mechanisms involved in sexual behavior and feelings, and related topics such as sexual orientation, by the neuroscientist Simon LeVay. The book was praised as a well-written work on science. However, some reviewers pointed out factual errors, and stated that LeVay failed to prove that homosexuality has a biological basis.
Graysexuality, greysexuality, gray asexuality, or gray-sexuality is a sexuality within the a-spectrum. It is often defined as limited amounts of sexual attraction that can vary in intensity. Individuals who identify with gray asexuality are referred to as being gray-A, gray ace, and are within what is referred to as the "a-umbrella". Within the a-spectrum are terms such as demisexual, graysexual, asexual, and many other types of non-allosexual identities.
Lisa M. Diamond is an American psychologist and feminist. She is a professor of developmental psychology, health psychology and gender studies at the University of Utah. Her research focuses on sexual orientation development, sexual identity, and bonding.
Juana María Rodríguez is a Cuban-American professor of Ethnic Studies, Gender and Women's Studies, and Performance Studies at the University of California, Berkeley. Her scholarly writing in queer theory, critical race theory, and performance studies highlights the intersection of race, gender, sexuality and embodiment in constructing subjectivity.
This is a timeline of asexual history worldwide. The briefness of this timeline can be attributed to the fact that acceptance of asexuality as a sexual orientation and field of scientific research is still relatively new.
Bisexual literature is a subgenre of LGBTQ literature that includes literary works and authors that address the topic of bisexuality or biromanticism. This includes characters, plot lines, and/or themes portraying bisexual behavior in both men and women.
Discrimination against asexual people, also known as acephobia or aphobia when directed at aspec people, encompasses a range of negative attitudes, behaviours, and feelings toward asexuality or people who identify as part of the asexual spectrum. Negative feelings or characterisations toward asexuality include dehumanisation, the belief that asexuality is a mental illness, that asexual people cannot feel love, and the refusal to accept asexuality as a genuine sexual orientation. Asexuality is sometimes confused with celibacy, abstinence, antisexualism, or hyposexuality. Since discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation belongs under the wider social concept of kyriarchy, any acephobic acts due to intentional discrimination are a form of kyriarchy.
The portrayals of asexuality in the media reflect societal attitudes towards asexuality, reflected in the existing media portrayals. Throughout history, asexual characters have appeared in television series, animated series, literature, comics, video games, music, and film.
Allosexuality is the ability to experience sexual attraction. The term is often used to describe persons who are not asexual, or the lack of identification with asexuality. Someone who experiences allosexuality is allosexual, sometimes shortened to allo. Other terms to describe non-asexual people include zedsexual, or simply sexual.
Queerplatonic relationships (QPR), also known as queerplatonic partnerships (QPP), are committed intimate relationships between significant others whose relationship is not romantic in nature. A queerplatonic relationship differs from a close friendship by having the same explicit commitment, status, and structure as a formal romantic relationship, whilst it differs from a romantic relationship by not involving feelings of romantic love. The concept originates in aromantic and asexual spaces in the LGBT community. Like romantic relationships, queerplatonic relationships are sometimes said to involve a deeper and more profound emotional connection than typical friendship.
Fraysexuality is the phenomenon of people who are sexually attracted to people they don't know, and the more they know a person, the less they are sexually attracted to them, and is a subsector of grey asexuality.