Sounds Fake but Okay | |
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Presentation | |
Hosted by | Sarah Costello Kayla Kaszyca |
Genre | Comedy Society & Culture |
Language | English |
Updates | Weekly on Sundays |
Length | 50–70 minutes |
Production | |
No. of episodes | 240 [1] |
Publication | |
Original release | July 31, 2017 |
Related | |
Website | www.soundsfakepod.com |
Part of a series on |
Asexuality topics |
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Related topics |
In society |
Studies |
Attitudes and discrimination |
Asexual community |
Lists |
Portals |
Sounds Fake but Okay is a weekly comedy podcast that focuses on asexuality and aromanticism. The podcast is hosted by University of Michigan alumni Sarah Costello and Kayla Kaszyca. Each Sunday, Costello and Kaszyca "talk about all things to do with love, relationships, sexuality, and pretty much anything else they just don't understand." [2]
In November 2020, it was honored with the 2020 Discover Pods Award for "Best LGBTQ+ Culture Podcast". [3]
Costello and Kaszyca met when they were randomly placed as roommates at the University of Michigan. The pair immediately hit it off and became best friends. They did not discuss sexuality during their freshman year; neither Costello nor Kaszyca had fully figured out their identities yet. The summer after their freshman year, Costello came out as aromantic asexual through a Tumblr post which Kaszyca subsequently saw. [4]
After this, the pair discussed sexuality regularly. As Costello had never dated, she had many questions for Kaszyca about how relationships and dating worked. The conversations that resulted from questions like "why would you date someone?" and "what is the appeal of kissing someone?" became the inspiration for the podcast. [5]
Over the course of the podcast, Kaszyca realized that she was demisexual. Though she had begun to question her sexuality during her junior year of college, she did not come to terms with it until later. In episode 19 of the podcast, titled "Accepting Your Sexuality", [6] Kaszyca explained how the podcast and Costello had helped her discover new things about herself. [4]
Sounds Fake but Okay is released weekly on Sundays at 14:00 UTC (10:00am Eastern) and episodes are about one hour long. The topics covered in each episode are inspired by conversations and experiences that the hosts share. [4] Topics range from those serious, such as asexual people's place in the queer community, to lighthearted, such as discussions of fandom or pop culture. [2] The episodes are typically casual, with Costello and Kaszyca frequently going off on tangents or switching topics mid-episode. [5] They announced during their first episode back from their hiatus that they would be taking breaks in the winter and summer. [7]
Though the show generally only features Costello and Kaszyca, they are occasionally joined by guests. Guests have included people the hosts met at school, [8] members of Costello's family (both her sister [9] and her mother [10] ), and other creators and activists in the asexual and aromantic communities. In episode 117, they were joined by Yasmin Benoit, a notable aro-ace activist and model. [11] They subsequently removed this episode from their playlists at the request of Yasmin.
On December 8, 2020, the show's official Twitter account announced that Costello and Kaszyca would be releasing a book, focusing on "the aspec lens, asexual relationships, and how the aspec mindset can apply to every aspect of your life." [21]
On February 21, 2023, the book Sounds Fake but Okay: An Asexual and Aromantic Perspective on Love, Relationships, Sex, and Pretty Much Anything Else was published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers. [22]
Romantic orientation, also called affectional orientation, is the classification of the sex or gender which a person experiences romantic attraction towards or is likely to have a romantic relationship with. The term is used alongside the term "sexual orientation", as well as being used alternatively to it, based upon the perspective that sexual attraction is only a single component of a larger concept.
Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others, or low or absent interest in or desire for sexual activity. It may be considered a sexual orientation or the lack thereof. It may also be categorized more widely, to include a broad spectrum of asexual sub-identities.
Demisexuality is a sexual orientation in which an individual does not experience primary sexual attraction – the type of attraction that is based on immediately observable characteristics such as appearance or smell and is experienced immediately after a first encounter. A demisexual person can only experience secondary sexual attraction – the type of attraction that occurs after the development of an emotional bond. The amount of time that a demisexual individual needs to know another person before developing sexual attraction towards them varies from person to person. Demisexuality is generally categorized on the asexuality spectrum.
Aromanticism is a romantic orientation characterized by experiencing little to no romantic attraction. The term "aromantic", colloquially shortened to "aro", refers to a person whose romantic orientation is aromanticism.
Gray asexuality, grey asexuality, or gray-sexuality is the spectrum between asexuality and allosexuality. Individuals who identify with gray asexuality are referred to as being gray-A, gray ace, and make up what is referred to as the "ace umbrella". Within this spectrum are terms such as demisexual, semisexual, asexual-ish and sexual-ish.
This is a timeline of asexual history worldwide. The briefness of this timeline can be attributed to the fact that acceptance of asexuality as a sexual orientation and field of scientific research is still relatively new.
Discrimination against asexual people, also known as acephobia or aphobia when directed at aspec people, encompasses a range of negative attitudes, behaviours, and feelings toward asexuality or people who identify as part of the asexual spectrum. Negative feelings or characterisations toward asexuality include dehumanisation, the belief that asexuality is a mental illness, that asexual people cannot feel love, and the refusal to accept asexuality as a genuine sexual orientation. Asexuality is sometimes confused with celibacy, abstinence, antisexualism, or hyposexuality.
Yasmin Benoit is a lingerie and alternative model in the United Kingdom. She is also an asexual activist.
The portrayals of asexuality in the media reflect societal attitudes towards asexuality, reflected in the existing media portrayals. Throughout history, asexual characters have appeared in television series, animated series, literature, comics, video games, music, and film.
Queerplatonic relationships (QPR) and queerplatonic partnerships (QPP) are committed intimate relationships which are not romantic in nature. They may differ from usual close friendships by having more explicit commitment, validation, status, structure, and norms, similar to a conventional romantic relationship. The concept originates in aromantic and asexual spaces in the LGBT community. Like romantic relationships, queerplatonic relationships are sometimes said to involve a deeper and more profound emotional connection than typical friendship.
The split attraction model (SAM) is a model in psychology that distinguishes between a person's romantic and sexual attraction, allowing the two to be different from each other.
Free From Desire is a biographical narrative documentary podcast that focuses on aromanticism and asexuality. The podcast was written and created by Aline Laurent-Mayard, and is produced by the French podcast company Paradiso Media.
Allonormativity is the concept that all humans experience sexual attraction and romantic attraction. It is the force which upholds compulsory sexuality, the social systems and structures which privilege or incentivize sexual relationships over single individuals.
Aze is a literary magazine for asexual, aromantic, and agender people that was created in 2016 and publishes issues online. It was formerly known as The Asexual until 2019 when it expanded to include aromantic and agender people. The magazine publishes visual art, poetry, and personal and academic essays on the subjects of asexuality, aromanticism, and agender experiences and their various intersections. It was founded by Michael Paramo.
Loveless is a novel written by Alice Oseman. Published by HarperCollins Children's Books on 9 July 2020, the novel follows Georgia as she begins university. Depicting her journey of self-discovery as an asexual and aromantic individual, the novel received positive reception from literary reviewers and media outlets.
Michael Paramo is a writer, academic, and artist known for founding the literary magazine Aze and for their work examining interpersonal attraction and love with consideration to asexuality, aromanticism, and agender identity. Paramo identifies on the asexual and aromantic spectrum and advocates for people of similar experience to express themselves toward expanding society's ideas of human sexuality, romance, and gender identity. They published a book Ending the Pursuit: Asexuality, Aromanticism, and Agender Identity in 2024.