Gaslighting is a colloquialism, defined as manipulating someone into questioning their own perception of reality. [1] [2] The expression, which derives from the title of the 1944 film Gaslight , became popular in the mid-2010s. Merriam-Webster cites deception of one's memory, perception of reality, or mental stability. [2] According to a 2022 Washington Post report, it had become a "trendy buzzword" frequently improperly used to describe ordinary disagreements, rather than those situations that align with the word's historical definition. [3]
The origin of the term is the 1938 British thriller play Gas Light by Patrick Hamilton, which provided the source material for the 1940 British film, Gaslight . The film was then remade in 1944 in America – also as Gaslight – and it is this film which has since become the primary reference point for the term. [4] [5] [6] Set among London's elite during the Victorian era, it portrays a seemingly genteel husband using lies and manipulation to isolate his heiress wife and persuade her that she is mentally unwell so that he can steal from her. [7] The term "gaslighting" itself is neither in the screenplay nor mentioned in either the films or the play in any context. One of the husband's tricks is to secretly dim and brighten the indoor gas-powered lighting, while he insists his wife is imagining it. [8]
The gerund form gaslighting was first used in the 1950s, particularly in the episode of The Burns and Allen Show ; in The New York Times , it was first used in a 1995 column by Maureen Dowd. [9] According to the American Psychological Association in 2021, gaslighting "once referred to manipulation so extreme as to induce mental illness or to justify commitment of the gaslighted person to a psychiatric institution". [1] Largely an obscure or esoteric term until gaining popularity in the mid-2010s – The New York Times only used it nine times in the following 20 years [9] – it has seeped into the English lexicon [9] and is now used more generally. Merriam-Webster defines it as "psychological manipulation" to make someone question their "perception of reality" leading to "dependence on the perpetrator". [2]
The term has received a number of notable recognitions. The American Dialect Society named gaslight the "most useful" new word of 2016. [10] Oxford University Press named gaslighting as a runner-up in its list of the most popular new words of 2018. [11]
Gaslighting is a term used in self-help and amateur psychology to describe a dynamic that can occur in personal relationships (romantic or parental) and in workplace relationships. [12] [13] Gaslighting involves two parties: the "gaslighter", who persistently puts forth a false narrative in order to manipulate, and the "gaslighted", who struggles to maintain their individual autonomy. [14] [15] Gaslighting is typically effective only when there is an unequal power dynamic or when the gaslighted has shown respect to the gaslighter. [16]
Gaslighting is different from genuine relationship disagreement, which is both common and important in relationships. Gaslighting is distinct in that:
The term gaslighting is more often used to refer to a pattern of behavior over a long duration, not a one-off instance of persuasion, but the method(s) of persuasion is the defining trait of gaslighting behavior. [3] Over time, the listening partner may exhibit symptoms often associated with anxiety disorders, depression, or low self-esteem. Gaslighting is distinct from genuine relationship conflict in that one party manipulates the perceptions of the other. [16]
The word gaslighting is occasionally used in clinical literature, but is considered a colloquialism by the American Psychological Association. [1] [17]
Since the 1970s, the term has been used in psychoanalytic literature to describe a "conscious intent to brainwash". [18]
Barton and Whitehead described three case reports of gaslighting with the goal of securing a person's involuntary commitment to a psychiatric hospital, motivated by a desire to get rid of relatives or obtain financial gain: a wife attempting to frame her husband as violent so she could elope with her lover, another wife alleging that her pub-owning husband was an alcoholic in order to leave him and take control of the pub, and a retirement home manager who gave laxatives to a resident before referring her to a psychiatric hospital for slight dementia and incontinence. [19] [20]
In 1977, at a time when published literature on gaslighting was still sparse, Lund and Gardiner published a case report on an elderly woman who was repeatedly involuntarily committed for alleged psychosis, by staffers of her retirement home, but whose symptoms always disappeared shortly after admittance without any treatment. After investigation, it was discovered that her 'paranoia' had been the result of gaslighting by staffers of the retirement home, who knew the woman had suffered from paranoid psychosis 15 years prior. [20] The research paper, "Gaslighting: A Marital Syndrome", includes clinical observations of the impact on wives after their reactions were mislabeled by their husbands and male therapists. [21] Other experts have noted values and techniques of therapists can be harmful as well as helpful to clients (or indirectly to other people in a client's life). [22] [23] [24]
In his 1996 book, Gaslighting, the Double Whammy, Interrogation and Other Methods of Covert Control in Psychotherapy and Analysis, Theo L. Dorpat recommends non-directive and egalitarian attitudes and methods on the part of clinicians, [23] : 225 and "treating patients as active collaborators and equal partners". [23] : 246 He writes, "Therapists may contribute to the victim's distress through mislabeling the [victim's] reactions.... The gaslighting behaviors of the spouse provide a recipe for the so-called 'nervous breakdown' for some [victims, and] suicide in some of the worst situations." [23] Dorpat also cautions clinicians about the unintentional abuse of patients when using interrogation and other methods of covert control in Psychotherapy and Analysis, as these methods can subtly coerce patients rather than respect and genuinely help them. [23] : 31–46
This increased global awareness of the dangers of gaslighting has not been met with enthusiasm by all psychologists, some of whom have issued warnings that overuse of the term could weaken its meaning and minimize the serious health effects of such abuse. [11]
Gaslighting is a way to control the moment, stop conflict, ease anxiety, and feel in control. However, it often deflects responsibility and tears down the other person. [16] Some may gaslight their partners by denying events, including personal violence. [25]
Gaslighting is a learned trait. A gaslighter is a student of social learning. They witness it, experience it themselves, or stumble upon it, and see that it works, both for self-regulation and coregulation. [16] Studies have shown that gaslighting is more prevalent in couples where one or both partners have maladaptive personality traits [26] (such as traits associated with short-term mental illness like depression), substance-induced illness (e.g., alcoholism), mood disorders (e.g., bipolar disorder), anxiety disorders (e.g., PTSD), personality disorder (e.g., BPD, NPD, etc.), neurodevelopmental disorder (e.g., ADHD), or combination of the above (i.e., co-occurrence) and are prone to and adept at convincing others to doubt their own perceptions. [27]
It can be difficult to extricate oneself from a gaslighting power dynamic:
The word "gaslighting" is often used incorrectly to refer to conflicts and disagreements. [3] [17] [29] According to Robin Stern, PhD, co-founder of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, "Gaslighting is often used in an accusatory way when somebody may just be insistent on something, or somebody may be trying to influence you. That's not what gaslighting is." [17]
Some mental health experts have expressed concern that the broader use of the term is diluting its usefulness and may make it more difficult to identify the specific type of abuse described in the original definition. [11] [3] [29]
"Medical gaslighting" is an informal term [30] that refers to patients having their real symptoms dismissed or downplayed by medical professionals, leading to incorrect diagnoses. Women and racial minorities are more likely to be affected by the phenomenon. [31] [32] [33]
Gaslighting is more likely to be effective when the gaslighter has a position of power. [34]
In the 2008 book State of Confusion: Political Manipulation and the Assault on the American Mind, the authors contend that the prevalence of gaslighting in American politics began with the age of modern communications: [35]
To say gaslighting was started by... any extant group is not simply wrong, it also misses an important point. Gaslighting comes directly from blending modern communications, marketing, and advertising techniques with long-standing methods of propaganda. They were simply waiting to be discovered by those with sufficient ambition and psychological makeup to use them.
The term has been used to describe the behavior of politicians and media personalities on both the left and the right sides of the political spectrum. [35] Some examples include:
One of the earliest uses of the term in television was in a 1952 episode of The Burns and Allen Show titled "Gracie Buying Boat for George". [39]
The word is used in a 1962 episode of Car 54, Where Are You? titled "What Happened to Thursday?". [39]
In the 1974 The Six Million Dollar Man second-season episode, "The Seven Million Dollar Man", Steve Austin accuses Oscar Goldman, Rudy Wells and nurse Carla Peterson of gaslighting him after all three try to convince him that an incident he saw did not happen. [40]
In 1994, the character Roz Doyle uses the phrase in "Fortysomething", an episode of the American television sitcom Frasier . [41]
In a 2000 interview, the writers of the song "Gaslighting Abbie" (Steely Dan album Two Against Nature ) explain that the lyrics were inspired by a term they heard in New York City, "gaslighting", which they believed was derived from the 1944 film Gaslight. "It is about a certain kind of mind [manipulation] or messing with somebody's head". [42]
During the period 2014–2016, BBC Radio 4's soap opera The Archers aired a two-year long storyline about Helen who was subjected to slow-burning coercive control by her bullying, manipulative husband, Rob. [43] The show shocked listeners, sparking a national discussion about domestic abuse. [44]
In the 2016 film The Girl on the Train , Rachel has severe depression and alcoholism. The storyline evolves around Rachel's blackouts as her husband consistently tells her that she has done terrible things that she did not actually do. [45]
In 2017, the phrase was used to describe Harvey Weinstein's extraordinary measures (see Harvey Weinstein sexual abuse cases § Weinstein's response) to discredit the women he sexually preyed upon, the journalists investigating their stories, and the public. [46]
In 2018, NBC's soap opera Days of Our Lives had a months-long storyline about retaliation and Gabi's systematic efforts to have her best friend Abigail committed into a mental health care facility. In the end, Gabi gleefully confessed to Abigail what she had done to her and why. [47]
In 2019, CNN's nightly news commentary, Anderson Cooper 360° , aired 24 episodes about the lies being told by politicians in the news. The segments were named "Keeping Them Honest: We'll Leave The Gaslight on for You, Part __". [16]
In 2020, country music group the Chicks released a song titled "Gaslighter" about a manipulative husband. [48]
In 2022, the Starz miniseries Gaslit starring Julia Roberts and Sean Penn uses the term as its title to describe the themes of deception and abuse of power underlying the Watergate Scandal which ultimately brought down the presidency of Richard Nixon.
In 2022, Merriam-Webster named "gaslighting" as its Word of the Year due to the vast increase in channels and technologies used to mislead and the word becoming common for the perception of deception. [49]
The Gospel of Afranius , a praised atheistic Russian work originally self-published in 1995 that came out in English in 2022, proposes politically motivated gaslighting as the origin of the foundational Christian belief in the resurrection of Jesus. [50]
Psychotherapy is the use of psychological methods, particularly when based on regular personal interaction, to help a person change behavior, increase happiness, and overcome problems. Psychotherapy aims to improve an individual's well-being and mental health, to resolve or mitigate troublesome behaviors, beliefs, compulsions, thoughts, or emotions, and to improve relationships and social skills. Numerous types of psychotherapy have been designed either for individual adults, families, or children and adolescents. Certain types of psychotherapy are considered evidence-based for treating some diagnosed mental disorders; other types have been criticized as pseudoscience.
Disinformation is false information deliberately spread to deceive people. Disinformation is an orchestrated adversarial activity in which actors employ strategic deceptions and media manipulation tactics to advance political, military, or commercial goals. Disinformation is implemented through attacks that "weaponize multiple rhetorical strategies and forms of knowing—including not only falsehoods but also truths, half-truths, and value judgements—to exploit and amplify culture wars and other identity-driven controversies."
Abuse is the improper usage or treatment of a person or thing, often to unfairly or improperly gain benefit. Abuse can come in many forms, such as: physical or verbal maltreatment, injury, assault, violation, rape, unjust practices, crimes, or other types of aggression. To these descriptions, one can also add the Kantian notion of the wrongness of using another human being as means to an end rather than as ends in themselves. Some sources describe abuse as "socially constructed", which means there may be more or less recognition of the suffering of a victim at different times and societies.
Silent treatment is the refusal to communicate verbally or electronically with someone who is trying to communicate and elicit a response. It may range from just sulking to malevolent abusive controlling behaviour. It may be a passive-aggressive form of emotional abuse in which displeasure, disapproval and contempt is exhibited through nonverbal gestures while maintaining verbal silence. Clinical psychologist Harriet Braiker identifies it as a form of manipulative punishment. It may be used as a form of social rejection; according to the social psychologist Kipling Williams, it is the most common form of ostracism.
Verbal abuse is a type of psychological/mental abuse that involves the use of oral, gestured, and written language directed to a victim. Verbal abuse can include the act of harassing, labeling, insulting, scolding, rebuking, or excessive yelling towards an individual. It can also include the use of derogatory terms, the delivery of statements intended to frighten, humiliate, denigrate, or belittle a person. These kinds of attacks may result in mental and/or emotional distress for the victim.
Complex post-traumatic stress disorder is a stress-related mental disorder generally occurring in response to complex traumas, i.e., commonly prolonged or repetitive exposures to a series of traumatic events, within which individuals perceive little or no chance to escape.
Recovered-memory therapy (RMT) is a catch-all term for a controversial and scientifically discredited form of psychotherapy that critics say utilizes one or more unproven therapeutic techniques to purportedly help patients recall previously forgotten memories. Proponents of recovered memory therapy claim, contrary to evidence, that traumatic memories can be buried in the subconscious and thereby affect current behavior, and that these memories can be recovered through the use of RMT techniques. RMT is not recommended by professional mental health associations. RMT can result in patients developing false memories of sexual abuse from their childhood and events such as alien abduction which had not actually occurred.
Sexual abuse or sex abuse is abusive sexual behavior by one person upon another. It is often perpetrated using physical force, or by taking advantage of another. Sexual abuse is a term used for a persistent pattern of sexual assaults. The offender is referred to as a sexual abuser. Live streaming sexual abuse involves trafficking and coerced sexual acts, and/or rape, in real time on webcam.
Mind games are actions performed for reasons of psychological one-upmanship, often employing passive–aggressive behavior to specifically demoralize or dis-empower the thinking subject, making the aggressor look superior. It also describes the unconscious games played by people engaged in ulterior transactions of which they are not fully aware, and which transactional analysis considers to form a central element of social life all over the world.
In psychology, a false memory is a phenomenon where someone recalls something that did not actually happen or recalls it differently from the way it actually happened. Suggestibility, activation of associated information, the incorporation of misinformation, and source misattribution have been suggested to be several mechanisms underlying a variety of types of false memory.
Religious abuse is abuse administered through religion, including harassment or humiliation that may result in psychological trauma. Religious abuse may also include the misuse of religion for selfish, secular, or ideological ends, such as the abuse of a clerical position.
In psychology, manipulation is defined as an action designed to influence or control another, usually in an underhanded or unfair manner which facilitates one's personal aims. Methods used to distort the individual's perception of reality may include seduction, suggestion, and blackmail to induce submission. Usage of the term varies depending on which behavior is specifically included, whether referring to the general population or used in clinical contexts. Manipulation is generally considered a dishonest form of social influence as it is used at the expense of others.
Trauma bonds are emotional bonds that arise from a cyclical pattern of abuse. A trauma bond occurs in an abusive relationship, wherein the victim forms an emotional bond with the perpetrator. The concept was developed by psychologists Donald Dutton and Susan Painter.
Whataboutism or whataboutery is a pejorative for the strategy of responding to an accusation with a counter-accusation instead of a defense against the original accusation.
Abusive power and control is behavior used by an abusive person to gain and/or maintain control over another person. Abusers are commonly motivated by devaluation, personal gain, personal gratification, psychological projection, or the enjoyment of exercising power and control. The victims of this behavior are often subject to psychological, physical, sexual, or financial abuse.
Internet manipulation is the co-optation of online digital technologies, including algorithms, social bots, and automated scripts, for commercial, social, military, or political purposes. Internet and social media manipulation are the prime vehicles for spreading disinformation due to the importance of digital platforms for media consumption and everyday communication. When employed for political purposes, internet manipulation may be used to steer public opinion, polarise citizens, circulate conspiracy theories, and silence political dissidents. Internet manipulation can also be done for profit, for instance, to harm corporate or political adversaries and improve brand reputation. Internet manipulation is sometimes also used to describe the selective enforcement of Internet censorship or selective violations of net neutrality.
DARVO is a reaction that perpetrators of wrongdoing, such as sexual offenders, may display in response to being held accountable for their behavior. Some researchers indicate that it is a common manipulation strategy of psychological abusers.
The Gaslight Effect: How to spot and survive the hidden manipulation others use to control your life, is a book by psychologist Robin Stern which has been credited with popularizing the term "gaslighting".
Robin Stern is an American psychoanalyst at Yale University, associate director for the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, an associate research scientist at the Yale Child Study Center, and is on the faculty of Teachers College, Columbia University.
Therapy speak is the incorrect use of jargon from psychology, especially jargon related to psychotherapy and mental health. It tends to be linguistically prescriptive and formal in tone.
Etymology: from the title of George Cukor's 1944 film Gaslight
The verb 'to gaslight,' voted by the American Dialect Society in 2016 as the word most useful/likely to succeed, and defined as "to psychologically manipulate a person into questioning their own sanity," derives from MGM's 1944 movie, directed by George Cukor.
to understand gaslighting is to go to the source. George Cukor's Gaslight. The term 'gaslighting' comes from the movie.
most useful word of the year
Weinshel, in a series of unpublished papers, designates a conscious intent to brainwash as 'gaslighting.'
Sakamoto: What does the title of the first track, 'Gaslighting Abbie,' mean? Fagen: ..the term 'to gaslight' comes from the film Gaslight.... So it's really a certain kind of mind fucking, or messing with somebody's head by.... Becker: That's sort of the rich old tradition of gaslighting which we were invoking.