Falling in love

Last updated
Albert Schroder - Musikalische Unterhaltung (circa 1885) Albert Schroder Musikalische Unterhaltung 1885.jpg
Albert Schröder - Musikalische Unterhaltung (circa 1885)
God Speed by English artist Edmund Leighton, 1900: depicting an armored knight departing for war and leaving behind his lover Leighton-God Speed!.jpg
God Speed by English artist Edmund Leighton, 1900: depicting an armored knight departing for war and leaving behind his lover

Falling in love is the development of strong feelings of attachment and love, usually towards another person.

Contents

The term is metaphorical, emphasizing that the process, like the physical act of falling, is sudden, uncontrollable and leaves the lover in a vulnerable state, similar to "fall ill" or "fall into a trap". [1]

It may also reflect the importance of the lower brain centers in the process, [2] which can lead the rational, accounting brain to conclude (in John Cleese's words) that "this falling in love routine is very bizarre.... It borders on the occult". [3]

Factors

Mental

"Factors known to contribute strongly to falling in love include proximity, similarity, reciprocity, and physical attractiveness", [4] while at the same time, the process involves a re-activation of old childhood patterns of attachment. [5] Deep-set psychological parallels between two people may also underpin their pairing-bonding, [6] which can thus border on mere narcissistic identification. [7]

Jungians view the process of falling in love as one of projecting the anima or animus onto the other person, with all the potential for misunderstanding that this can involve. [8]

Chemical

Jean-Honore Fragonard--The Stolen Kiss (circa late 1780s) Jean-Honore Fragonard - The Stolen Kiss.jpg
Jean-Honoré Fragonard The Stolen Kiss (circa late 1780s)

Two chemical reactions associated with falling in love are increases in oxytocin and vasopressin; [9] and Elisabeth Young-Bruehl has suggested that "when we fall in love we are falling into a stream of naturally occurring amphetamines running through the emotional centres of our very own brains". [7] With regard to sociobiology, it is stressed that mate selection cannot be left to the head alone [10] and must require complex neurochemical support. [11]

Critics of such Neo-Darwinism point out that over-simplistic physical arguments obscure the way sexual passion often leads not to secure attachment but to attachments thwarted, as well as the sheer frightening difficulties of all falling in love. [12]

Biologist Jeremy Griffith suggests that people fall in love in order to abandon themselves to the dream of an ideal state (being one free of the human condition).[ citation needed ]

"Sexual desire and love not only show differences but also recruit a striking common set of brain areas that mediate somatosensory integration, reward expectation, and social cognition" [13] Neuroimaging studies show that love and sexual desire share common chemical reactions in the brain. Both love and lust show neural activation in regions such as the cortical area (e.g., middle gyrus, superior temporal gyrus, temporo-parietal junction, and occipital-temporal cortices) and the subcortical brain areas (e.g., striatum, thalamus, hippocampus, anterior cingulate cortex, and ventral segmental area). [14] The cortical area of the brain is correlated with a person's self-representation, goals-directed actions, and body image. [14] Neuroimaging can also show the difference between love and desire. [14] Some brain regions that contribute to either love or lust are the anterior insula, posterior insula, and the ventral striatum. [14] The anterior insula activates factors that contribute to love such as integrative representations, whereas the posterior insula is involved with factors that contribute to desire such as current sensations, feelings, and responses. [14] The ventral striatum however, becomes activated during pleasurable rewarding experiences such as sex or food. [14]

Gender differences

Many studies indicate a positive linear correlation between romantic popularity and physical attractiveness for women more than men. [15] Some studies indicate that men subconsciously seek slenderness and sexiness whereas women seek status, permanence, and affluence before they seek physical attractiveness. [15] In addition, men tend to show their emotions through actions while women tend to express their feelings with words. [16]

Timing

Stendhal charted the timing of falling in love in terms of what he called crystallization—a first period of crystallization (of some six weeks) [17] which often involves obsessive brooding and the idealisation of the other via a coating of desire; [18] a period of doubt; and then a final crystallization of love. [19]

Empirical studies suggest that men fall in love earlier than women and women are quicker to fall out of love than men. [20]

Studies show when comparing men who have fallen in love, their testosterone level is much higher than those that have been in a long-lasting relationship. [21]

See also

Related Research Articles

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Language center</span> Speech processing areas of the brain

In neuroscience and psychology, the term language center refers collectively to the areas of the brain which serve a particular function for speech processing and production. Language is a core system that gives humans the capacity to solve difficult problems and provides them with a unique type of social interaction. Language allows individuals to attribute symbols to specific concepts, and utilize them through sentences and phrases that follow proper grammatical rules. Finally, speech is the mechanism by which language is orally expressed.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Striatum</span> Nucleus in the basal ganglia of the brain

The striatum or corpus striatum is a nucleus in the subcortical basal ganglia of the forebrain. The striatum is a critical component of the motor and reward systems; receives glutamatergic and dopaminergic inputs from different sources; and serves as the primary input to the rest of the basal ganglia.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Cingulate cortex</span> Part of the brain within the cerebral cortex

The cingulate cortex is a part of the brain situated in the medial aspect of the cerebral cortex. The cingulate cortex includes the entire cingulate gyrus, which lies immediately above the corpus callosum, and the continuation of this in the cingulate sulcus. The cingulate cortex is usually considered part of the limbic lobe.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Neuroesthetics</span> Sub-discipline of empirical aesthetics

Neuroesthetics is a relatively recent sub-discipline of applied aesthetics. Empirical aesthetics takes a scientific approach to the study of aesthetic experience of art, music, or any object that can give rise to aesthetic judgments. Neuroesthetics is a term coined by Semir Zeki in 1999 and received its formal definition in 2002 as the scientific study of the neural bases for the contemplation and creation of a work of art. Neuroesthetics uses neuroscience to explain and understand the aesthetic experiences at the neurological level. The topic attracts scholars from many disciplines including neuroscientists, art historians, artists, art therapists and psychologists.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Insular cortex</span> Portion of the mammalian cerebral cortex

The insular cortex is a portion of the cerebral cortex folded deep within the lateral sulcus within each hemisphere of the mammalian brain.

Affective neuroscience is the study of how the brain processes emotions. This field combines neuroscience with the psychological study of personality, emotion, and mood. The basis of emotions and what emotions are remains an issue of debate within the field of affective neuroscience.

The theory of a biological basis of love has been explored by such biological sciences as evolutionary psychology, evolutionary biology, anthropology and neuroscience. Specific chemical substances such as oxytocin are studied in the context of their roles in producing human experiences, emotions and behaviors that are associated with love.

Emotional isolation is a state of isolation where one may have a well-functioning social network but still feels emotionally separated from others.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Reward system</span> Group of neural structures responsible for motivation and desire

The reward system is a group of neural structures responsible for incentive salience, associative learning, and positively-valenced emotions, particularly ones involving pleasure as a core component. Reward is the attractive and motivational property of a stimulus that induces appetitive behavior, also known as approach behavior, and consummatory behavior. A rewarding stimulus has been described as "any stimulus, object, event, activity, or situation that has the potential to make us approach and consume it is by definition a reward". In operant conditioning, rewarding stimuli function as positive reinforcers; however, the converse statement also holds true: positive reinforcers are rewarding.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Frisson</span> Psychophysiological response to rewarding auditory or visual stimuli

Frisson, also known as aesthetic chills or psychogenic shivers, is a psychophysiological response to rewarding stimuli that often induces a pleasurable or otherwise positively-valenced affective state and transient paresthesia, sometimes along with piloerection and mydriasis . The sensation commonly occurs as a mildly to moderately pleasurable emotional response to music with skin tingling; piloerection and pupil dilation not necessarily occurring in all cases.

The biology of obsessive–compulsive disorder (OCD) refers biologically based theories about the mechanism of OCD. Cognitive models generally fall into the category of executive dysfunction or modulatory control. Neuroanatomically, functional and structural neuroimaging studies implicate the prefrontal cortex (PFC), basal ganglia (BG), insula, and posterior cingulate cortex (PCC). Genetic and neurochemical studies implicate glutamate and monoamine neurotransmitters, especially serotonin and dopamine.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Inhibitory control</span> Cognitive process

Inhibitory control, also known as response inhibition, is a cognitive process – and, more specifically, an executive function – that permits an individual to inhibit their impulses and natural, habitual, or dominant behavioral responses to stimuli in order to select a more appropriate behavior that is consistent with completing their goals. Self-control is an important aspect of inhibitory control. For example, successfully suppressing the natural behavioral response to eat cake when one is craving it while dieting requires the use of inhibitory control.

Emotional lateralization is the asymmetrical representation of emotional control and processing in the brain. There is evidence for the lateralization of other brain functions as well.

Definitions of sexual desire are broad and understandings of sexual desire are subjective. However, the development of various ways of measuring the construct allows for extensive research to be conducted that facilitates the investigation of influences of sexual desire. Particular differences have been observed between the sexes in terms of understanding sexual desire both with regard to one's own sexual desires, as well as what others desire sexually. These beliefs and understandings all contribute to how people behave and interact with others, particularly in terms of various types of intimate relationships.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Neuroscience of sex differences</span> Characteristics of the brain that differentiate the male brain and the female brain

The neuroscience of sex differences is the study of characteristics that separate brains of different sexes. Psychological sex differences are thought by some to reflect the interaction of genes, hormones, and social learning on brain development throughout the lifespan.

Even though intimacy has been broadly defined in terms of romantic love and sexual desire, the neuroanatomy of intimacy needs further explanation in order to fully understand their neurological functions in different components within intimate relationships, which are romantic love, lust, attachment, and rejection in love. Also, known functions of the neuroanatomy involved can be applied to observations seen in people who are experiencing any of the stages in intimacy. Research analysis of these systems provide insight on the biological basis of intimacy, but the neurological aspect must be considered as well in areas that require special attention to mitigate issues in intimacy, such as violence against a beloved partner or problems with social bonding.

Meditation and pain is the study of the physiological mechanisms underlying meditation—specifically its neural components—that implicate it in the reduction of pain perception.

Social cognitive neuroscience is the scientific study of the biological processes underpinning social cognition. Specifically, it uses the tools of neuroscience to study "the mental mechanisms that create, frame, regulate, and respond to our experience of the social world". Social cognitive neuroscience uses the epistemological foundations of cognitive neuroscience, and is closely related to social neuroscience. Social cognitive neuroscience employs human neuroimaging, typically using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI). Human brain stimulation techniques such as transcranial magnetic stimulation and transcranial direct-current stimulation are also used. In nonhuman animals, direct electrophysiological recordings and electrical stimulation of single cells and neuronal populations are utilized for investigating lower-level social cognitive processes.

Present bias is the tendency to settle for a smaller present reward rather than wait for a larger future reward, in a trade-off situation. It describes the trend of overvaluing immediate rewards, while putting less worth in long-term consequences. The present bias can be used as a measure for self-control, which is a trait related to the prediction of secure life outcomes.

An empathy gap, sometimes referred to as an empathy bias, is a breakdown or reduction in empathy where it might otherwise be expected to occur. Empathy gaps may occur due to a failure in the process of empathizing or as a consequence of stable personality characteristics, and may reflect either a lack of ability or motivation to empathize.

References

  1. Pines, Ayala Malach (2000-10-27). Falling in Love. doi:10.4324/9780203902608. ISBN   9780203902608.
  2. Desmond Morris, The Naked Ape Trilogy p. 387
  3. R. Skinner/J. Cleese, Families and how to survive them (1994) p. 13
  4. R. Crooks/K. Baur, Our Sexuality (2010) p. 223
  5. Robert M. Gordon, An Expert Looks at Love, Intimacy and Personal Growth (2008) p. xiv-v
  6. Robin Skynner/John Cleese, Families and how to survive them (London 1994) p. 14
  7. 1 2 Elizabeth Young-Bruehl, Where Do We Fall When We Fall in Love? (2003) p. 20
  8. Carl Jung, Man and his Symbols (1964) p. 191
  9. S. Kuchinskas, The Chemistry of Connection (2009) p. 88-9
  10. Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence (London 1996) p. 4
  11. R. Crooks/K. Baur, Our Sexuality (2010) p. 186
  12. Elizabeth Young-Bruehl, Where Do We Fall When We Fall in Love? (2003) p. 5
  13. Cacioppo, Stephanie; Bianchi‐Demicheli, Francesco; Frum, Chris; Pfaus, James G.; Lewis, James W. (April 2012). "The Common Neural Bases Between Sexual Desire and Love: A Multilevel Kernel Density fMRI Analysis". The Journal of Sexual Medicine. 9 (4): 1048–1054. doi:10.1111/j.1743-6109.2012.02651.x. ISSN   1743-6095. PMID   22353205. S2CID   205897532.
  14. 1 2 3 4 5 6 Bolmont, Mylene; Cacioppo, John T.; Cacioppo, Stephanie (September 2014). "Love Is in the Gaze: An Eye-Tracking Study of Love and Sexual Desire". Psychological Science. 25 (9): 1748–1756. doi:10.1177/0956797614539706. ISSN   0956-7976. PMC   4273641 . PMID   25031302.
  15. 1 2 Ambwani, Suman; Strauss, Jaine (2007-02-01). "Love Thyself Before Loving Others? A Qualitative and Quantitative Analysis of Gender Differences in Body Image and Romantic Love". Sex Roles. 56 (1–2): 13–21. doi:10.1007/s11199-006-9143-7. ISSN   0360-0025. S2CID   144399618.
  16. Deng, Yaling; Chang, Lei; Yang, Meng; Huo, Meng; Zhou, Renlai (2016-06-30). "Gender Differences in Emotional Response: Inconsistency between Experience and Expressivity". PLOS ONE. 11 (6): e0158666. Bibcode:2016PLoSO..1158666D. doi: 10.1371/journal.pone.0158666 . ISSN   1932-6203. PMC   4928818 . PMID   27362361.
  17. Eric Berne, Transactional Analysis in Psychotherapy (1961) p. 245
  18. R. J. Sternberg/K. Weiss, A New Psychology of Love (2013) p. 125-8
  19. I. A. Mabergoj, Reality and Truth in Literature (2013) p. 174
  20. E. R. Smith/D. M. Mackie, Social Psychology (2007) p. 420
  21. Marazziti, Donatella; Canale, Domenico (2004-08-01). "Hormonal changes when falling in love". Psychoneuroendocrinology. 29 (7): 931–936. doi:10.1016/j.psyneuen.2003.08.006. ISSN   0306-4530. PMID   15177709. S2CID   24651931.

Further reading

Listen to this article (6 minutes)
Sound-icon.svg
This audio file was created from a revision of this article dated 8 September 2022 (2022-09-08), and does not reflect subsequent edits.