List of The Love Boat episodes

Last updated

The American television series The Love Boat (Love Boat in its final season), set on a cruise ship, was aired on ABC from September 24, 1977, until May 24, 1986. Each episode has multiple titles, referencing the simultaneous storylines contained within. There were three pilot movies, followed by 245 regular episodes over nine seasons, followed by five specials.

Contents

There were typically three storylines in each episode. One storyline usually focused on a member of the crew, a second storyline would often focus on a crew member interacting with a passenger, and the third storyline was more focused on a single passenger (or a group of passengers). The three storylines usually followed a similar thematic pattern: One storyline (typically the "crew" one) was straight-ahead comedy. The second would typically follow more of a romantic comedy format (with only occasional dramatic elements). The third storyline would usually be the most dramatic of the three, often offering few (if any) laughs and a far more serious tone.

Series overview

SeasonEpisodesOriginally aired
First airedLast aired
Pilots 3September 17, 1976 (1976-09-17)May 5, 1977 (1977-05-05)
1 25September 24, 1977 (1977-09-24)May 20, 1978 (1978-05-20)
2 27September 16, 1978 (1978-09-16)May 12, 1979 (1979-05-12)
3 28September 15, 1979 (1979-09-15)May 3, 1980 (1980-05-03)
4 28October 25, 1980 (1980-10-25)May 16, 1981 (1981-05-16)
5 29October 3, 1981 (1981-10-03)May 15, 1982 (1982-05-15)
6 29October 2, 1982 (1982-10-02)May 7, 1983 (1983-05-07)
7 27October 1, 1983 (1983-10-01)May 12, 1984 (1984-05-12)
8 27September 22, 1984 (1984-09-22)May 4, 1985 (1985-05-04)
9 25September 28, 1985 (1985-09-28)May 24, 1986 (1986-05-24)
Specials 5November 21, 1986 (1986-11-21)February 12, 1990 (1990-02-12)

Episodes

Pilot movies (1976–77)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleStoryDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
11"The Love Boat"Mona Lisa SpeaksRichard KinonCarl KleinschmittSeptember 17, 1976 (1976-09-17)
Till Death Do Its PartRichard KinonCarl Kleinschmitt
Mr. & Mrs. Havlicek AboardRichard Kinon and Alan MyersonRobert Iles & James R. Stein
Are There Any Real Love Stories?Richard Kinon and Alan MyersonDawn Aldredge & Marion C. Freeman
First pilot movie. It includes the storylines Mona Lisa Speaks, Till Death Do Its Part; Mr. & Mrs. Havlicek Aboard; and Are There Any Real Love Stories?. None of the eventual TV series cast appear in this first production.
22"The Love Boat II"Here's Looking at You, Love Hy Averback Dawn Aldredge & Marion C. FreemanJanuary 21, 1977 (1977-01-21)
For the Love of SandyStory by: Dawn Aldredge & Marion C. Freeman and Leonora Thuna
Teleplay by: Dawn Aldredge & Marion C. Freeman
Unfaithfully YoursCarl Kleinschmitt
The HecklerSteve Pretzker
Second pilot movie. It includes the storylines Here's Looking at You, Love; For the Love of Sandy; Unfaithfully Yours; and The Heckler. It has the first appearance of regular series cast members Fred Grandy as Gopher, Bernie Kopell as the ship's doctor (albeit with a different character name), and Ted Lange as Isaac the bartender.
33"The New Love Boat"The NewlywedsRichard KinonBrad BucknerMay 5, 1977 (1977-05-05)
The ExchangeRick Hawkins & Liz Sage
Cleo's First VoyageMichael Norell

Final pilot movie. It includes the storylines The Newlyweds; The Exchange; and Cleo's First Voyage. It introduces regular series cast members Gavin MacLeod as Captain Stubing and Lauren Tewes as Julie the cruise director; the previous captain is said to be now on leave. Guest stars include Georgia Engel as a stowaway, Gary Frank and Melanie Mayron as a pair of tremulous honeymooners, Stella Stevens and Pat Harrington as an eternally bickering married couple, and Audra Lindley and Phil Silvers as respectively, an outspoken middle-aged lady and a woebegone widower.

Guest Stars: Georgia Engel as Cleo Bagby, Gary Frank as Stanley Adams, Pat Harrington Jr. as Ernie Klopman (credited as Pat Harrington), Audra Lindley as Mae Allen, Melanie Mayron as Joyce Adams, Phil Silvers as Morris Beckman, and Stella Stevens as Leonara Klopman.

Other Guests: William Bassett as Josh and Paula Victor as Paula.

Season 1 (1977–78)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
11"Captain & the Lady"Stuart MargolinMichael NorellSeptember 24, 1977 (1977-09-24)
"Centerfold"Richard KinonJay Grossman
"One If by Land..."Alan RafkinJudy Skelton & Paula A. Roth

Captain Stubing's ex-wife (Bonnie Franklin) is a passenger with her new husband (Robert Symonds), a cruise line executive. She makes the crew pay for her animosity with the Captain. A former centerfold model (Meredith Baxter) struggles to hide her past from her fiancé who is a Congressman. A woman (Brenda Sykes) is followed by her boyfriend (Jimmie Walker) whom she dumped because he won't commit to marriage.

Guest stars: Meredith Baxter as Sandy Rytell (credited as Meredith Baxter Birney), Bonnie Franklin as Stacy Skaugstad, Captain Stubing's Ex-Wife, Shelly Novack as Congressman Brad Brockway, Suzanne Somers as Lorraine Hoffman, Brenda Sykes as Ginny O'Brien, and Jimmie Walker as Ronald Baker.

Other Guests: Robert Symonds as Aubrey Skaugstag, Gertrude Flynn as Mrs. Pendleton.
22"A Tasteful Affair"Richard KinonBen Joelson & Art BaerOctober 1, 1977 (1977-10-01)
"Oh, Dale!"Alan RafkinCarl Kleischmitt
"The Main Event"Stuart MargolinRick Callahan

A man (John Ritter) poses as a woman because the only available cabin he could share was already occupied by another woman (Tovah Feldshuh). A quarreling couple (Sherman Hemsley, LaWanda Page) is trapped in an elevator. A tycoon hires a detective (Dennis Cole) to find out if his wife (Jaclyn Smith) is cheating.

Guest Stars: Dennis Cole as Dennis Kingsley, Tovah Feldshuh as Susan Ridley, Sherman Hemsley as Maurice Marshall, LaWanda Page as Stella Marshall, John Ritter as Dale Riley / Dale Reinhardt, and Jaclyn Smith as Janette Bradford.

Other Guests: Jennifer Shaw as Joanne Pringle (credited as Joanne), David Knapp as Lucas Bradford (credited as Lucas), Craig Littler as Carl Daggett, Tiiu Leek as Linda Daggett, and Mark Thomas as Peter Pringle.
33"Ex Plus Y"Alan RafkinEd JuristOctober 8, 1977 (1977-10-08)
"Golden Agers"Stuart MargolinAnn Gibbs & Joel Kimmell
"Graham and Kelly"Alan RafkinMichael Norell

A man (Robert Reed) and woman (Loretta Swit) who are divorced from each other meet. Two teens (Kristy McNichol, Scott Baio) fall in love. A senior citizens guide (Charles Frank) is kept busy by his group and interfering with his romance with Julie.

Guest Stars: Edward Andrews as Seniors Group Leader, Harry, Hermione Baddeley as Mrs. Kitty Pickrel, Scott Baio as Graham D. Pickrel II, Pamela Bellwood as Judy Watson, Charles Frank as Jim Wright, Seniors' Chaperone, Kristy McNichol as Kelly Rixie, Richard Mulligan as Ron Larsen, Robert Reed as Barney Mason, and Loretta Swit as Terry Larsen.

Other Guests: Queenie Smith as Helen Lindsay, Betty Kean as Mrs. Svenson, and Florence Halop as Millie Lindsay.
44"Message for Maureen"Richard KinonKenneth Hartigan & David GarberOctober 15, 1977 (1977-10-15)
"Gotcha"Stuart MargolinRichard Albrecht & Casey Keller
"Acapulco Connection"Peter BaldwinNeil Rosen & George Trecker

A sportswriter (Bill Bixby) romances a paraplegic former tennis pro (Brenda Benet), and they may have been a couple prior; Doc falls for a seasick stowaway (Charo) who creates havoc; A practical joker (Milton Berle) plays one joke too many and learns a lesson.

Guest Stars: Brenda Benet as Maureen Mitchell, Milton Berle as Cyril Wolfe, Bill Bixby as John Ballard, Charo as April Lopez, and Audra Lindley as Anita Wolfe.

Other Guests: Mary Grace Canfield as Housekeeper, Britt Leach as Reverend Dickerson (credited as Rev. Dickerson), and Lynn Adams as Martha Dickerson (credited as Mrs. Dickerson).
55"Isaac the Groupie"Peter BaldwinMichael NorellOctober 22, 1977 (1977-10-22)
"Mr. Popularity"Tony WebsterTony Webster
"Help! Murder!" James Sheldon Ben Joelson & Art Baer

Isaac's favorite singer, Roxy Blue (Diahann Carroll), becomes his lover. Talky Robert Tanner's (Jim Nabors) popularity increases when fellow passengers think he may be a jewel thief. Bert Fredericks (David Groh) plans his wife Denise's (Michele Lee) birthday party, but she thinks it's a murder plot.

Guest Stars: Diahann Carroll as Roxy Blue, David Gro as Bert Fredericks, Michele Lee as Denise Fredericks, Jim Nabors as Robert Tanner (later claims to be 'Roscoe Toller'), and Reva Rose as Myra Grove.

Other Guests: Olan Soule as Harvey Grove (credited as Olan Soulé), and Robert Hastings as Customer (credited as Bob Hastings).
66"The Joker Is Mild"Richard KinonDavid Ketchum & Tony DimarcoOctober 29, 1977 (1977-10-29)
"Take My Granddaughter, Please"Richard KinonBarry Blitzer
"First Time Out"Alan RafkinMark Evanier & Dennis Palumbo

Has-been comic Barry Keys (Phil Foster) asks Julie to let him entertain on board to return a favor. Mrs. Warner (Ruth Gordon) is determined to marry off her granddaughter Shirley (Patty Duke). College pals bet on whether virginal Dan (Robert Hegyes) changes his status before the cruise ends.

Guest Stars: Patty Duke as Shirley Warner (credited as Patty Duke Astin), Phil Foster as Barry Keys, Ruth Gordon as Mrs. Warner, Robert Hegyes as Danny, Tab Hunter as Dave King, Maureen McCormick as Barbara Holmes, and John Mark Robinson as Lee.

Other Guests: W.K. Stratton as Kyle, Meegan King as Paul, and Robert Hackman as Freddy Stevens – Booking Agent (credited as Bob Hackman).
77"Julie's Old Flame"Don WeisMichael NorellNovember 12, 1977 (1977-11-12)
"The Jinx"Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein
"The Identical Problem"David Ketchum & Tony Dimarco

Identical twins (Diana Canova in a dual role) bewilder a smitten Doc. Julie tries to dodge a former beau (David Hedison). The crew blames a "jinxed" couple (Ray Bolger, Harriet Nelson) for a series of accidents.

Guest Stars: Ray Bolger as Horace McDonald, Harriet Nelson as Henrietta McDonald, Diana Canova as Ellen Edwards / Helen Edwards, and David Hedison as Buddy Stanfield.

Other Guests: Alana Stewart as Mrs. Stanfield (credited as Alana Collins).
88"Lost and Found"Stuart MargolinBruce ShellyNovember 19, 1977 (1977-11-19)
"The Understudy"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"Married Singles"Ray Jessel

A cruise-director trainee (Jo Ann Harris) is after Julie's job. A bickering married couple (Polly Bergen, Steve Allen) pose as swinging singles. A childless couple (Sandy Duncan, Jim Stafford) takes in a young runaway (James Bond III).

Guest Stars: Steve Allen as Durwood Moss, Polly Bergen as Maisie Nolan, Sandy Duncan as Sharon Baker, Jo Ann Harris as Connie Evans, and Jim Stafford as Richard Baker.

Other Guests: Loni Anderson as Barbie, Joshua Bryant as Jack Plymouth (credited as Josh Bryant), J. Jay Saunders as Mr. Dennison, Marilyn Coleman as Mrs. Dennison, Hayden Rorke as Mr. Humbertson, and James Bond III as Theodore Dennison, Jr.
99"The Captain's Captain"Jack ArnoldAnn Gibbs & Joel KimmelNovember 26, 1977 (1977-11-26)
"Romance Roulette"Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein
"Hounded"David Ketchum & Tony Dimarco

Three women (Jane Curtin, Susan Heldfond, Joanna Kerns) romance—but complications occur when they try to dump three men. The Captain's father (Phil Silvers) visits and falls for a galley cook (Judy Canova). A security dog traps a passenger (Gary Burghoff) in his bathroom.

Guest Stars: Gary Burghoff as Donald M. Flanders, Judy Canova as P. J. Muldoon, Jane Curtin as Regina Parker, and Phil Silvers as Merrill Stubing, Sr. ('Stubby').

Other Guests: David Landsberg as Morton, Vincent Baggetta as Frank Vallone the plumber (credited as Vince Baggetta), Joanna Kerns as Beth Luckner, and Susan Heldfond as Toby Chapman.

Others: Peter Mensah as Passenger (uncredited).
1010"Dear Beverly"Allen BaronBen Joelson & Art BaerDecember 3, 1977 (1977-12-03)
"The Strike"Mark Fink
"Special Delivery"Marlon C. Freeman

Advice columnist Beverly Blanchard (Eva Gabor) neglects her husband, Russ (Leslie Nielsen), who thus spends time with a fellow passenger (Stephanie Blackmore). Captain Stubing wages war with a visiting chef, Antonio Borga (Al Molinaro). Julie's friend, Jeff Smith (Robert Urich), is separated from his wife, Gail (Pamela Franklin), but doesn't know that she's on board and carrying his child.

Guest Stars: Pamela Franklin as Gail Smith, Eva Gabor as Beverly Blanchard, Al Molinaro as Chef Antonio Borga, Leslie Nielsen as Russ Blanchard, and Robert Urich as Jeff Smith (credited as Bob Urich).

Other Guests: Meg Wyllie as Sister #1, Mary Treen as Sister #2.
1111"Lonely at the Top"Allen BaronGordon Farr & Lynne FarrDecember 10, 1977 (1977-12-10)
"Silent Night"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"Divorce Me, Please"Bruce Howard

At Christmas, a lonely Captain Stubing alienates the crew by his lack of Christmas spirit. Ex-convict Dan Barton (John Gavin) meets his double-crossing law partner Walter Perry (Dean Santoro) on board and plans to get revenge, for being convicted of the crime the partner committed. Paul and Audrey Baynes (Shecky Greene, Florence Henderson) fantasize about divorcing each other. Minister Father Mike (Dick Sargent) chaperones six orphans.

Guest Stars: John Gavin as Dan Barton, Shecky Greene as Paul Baynes, Florence Henderson as Audrey Baynes, Donna Mills as Lila Barton, and Dick Sargent as Father Mike.

Other Guests: Dean Santoro as Walter Perry, Tiger Williams as Tony, Philip Tanzini as Peanut, Beatrice Colen as Vera, and Chanin Hale as Claire.
1212"The Old Man and the Runaway"Stuart MargolinHoward Albrecht & Sol WeinsteinDecember 24, 1977 (1977-12-24)
"The Painters"James SheldonRay Jessel
"A Fine Romance"James SheldonJack Hanrahan & Don Sherman

A curmudgeon (Will Geer) strikes up a friendship with a runaway teen (Bayn Johnson as Nancy Brown). The brother of a friend of Julie (Anson Williams) rebuffs her advances. Inept painters (Arte Johnson, Pat Morita) make a shambles of the Captain's cabin.

Guest Stars: Will Geer as Franklyn Bootherstone, Arte Johnson as Ronald, Pat Morita as Vincent, Tom Poston as Mickey O'Day, and Anson Williams as Sean McGlynn.

Others: Dorothy Green as Miss Westlake (uncredited)[ citation needed ]
1313"Too Hot to Handle"Richard KinonBen Joelson & Art BaerJanuary 7, 1978 (1978-01-07)
"Family Reunion"Richard KinonBruce Shelly
"Cinderella Story"James SheldonBruce Shelly

Honeymooners (John Rubinstein, Kathy Bates) experience a nightmare of a honeymoon. A supermarket assistant manager (Bruce Solomon), traveling with his wife (Judy Luciano), poses as a hot-shot executive with the crew's connivance. A ship's steward (Bob Crane) is reunited with his long-lost daughter (Dori Brenner).

Guest Stars: Bob Crane as Edward 'Teddy' Anderson, Rosemary DeCamp as Cynthia Loudon, Don DeFore as Everett Loudon, Robert Hays as Sam Bradley, Bruce Solomon as Bill Edwards, David White as Greg Beatty, John Rubinstein as George Allison, and Kathy Bates as Sally Allison.

Other Guests: Victoria Carroll as Ginger LeDoux, Bruce Solomon as Bill Edwards, Judy Luciano as Doreen Edwards (credited as Judy Luciano Adams), and Earl Montgomery as the man on the Sun Princess.
1414"Isaac's Double Standard"James SheldonSue Masters and John WalshJanuary 14, 1978 (1978-01-14)
"One More Time"James SheldonAnn Gibbs & Joel Kimmel
"Chimpanzeeshines"Richard KinonBernie Kahn

A thieving chimp almost wrecks Gopher's love life. Isaac's mother (Pearl Bailey) shocks her son by sharing quarters with her boyfriend. Feuding performers (Nanette Fabray, Don Adams) reunite for a show.

Guest Stars: Pearl Bailey as Millie Washington, Don Adams as Lenny Camen, Nanette Fabray as Mitzy Monroe, Allyn Ann McLerie as Cynthia Parker, Tracy Reed as Charlene Franks (credited as Tracey Reed), and introducing Louise the chimpanzee.

Other Guests: Kim Lankford as Anne Parker and Arthur Adams as Roy Harwood, D.D.S.
15
16
15
16
"The Eyes of Love"Allen BaronTony WebsterJanuary 21, 1978 (1978-01-21)
"Masquerade"Louis Pelletier and Marciia Muldoon
"Hollywood Royalty"Ray Jessel
"The Caper"Gordon & Lynne Farr and Ben Joelson & Art Baer

A Hollywood couple argues about a film he wants to produce, unaware that thieves are planning to rob them of a precious diamond in their possession. A blind girl is reunited with her schoolmate—who is no longer blind. A lawyer tries to keep his wife from finding out about his girlfriend who is also on the cruise. A masquerade ball highlights the conclusion of the voyage. The bumbling gang of thieves believes they have finally figured out a way to nab an elusive diamond, even as its owner comes to her own drastic decision on its fate; A blind woman wonders if she can be happy with a former blind friend, who has regained his sight; A man's wife and mistress discover who each other are.

A husband and wife (Fernando Lamas, Michele Lee), a famous Hollywood couple, arrive with paparazzi. She is adorned in a famous gigantic diamond which, of course, entices dim-witted bumbling crooks (Harold Gould, Karen Valentine, Larry Storch, John Schuck), in a delightful caper reminiscent of old Hollywood. A husband (Dan Rowan) is chagrined into bringing his wife (Juliet Mills) on the cruise when she finds the tickets for his mistress (Adrienne Barbeau) and himself, with some surprises. Two former attendees of a blind school (Desi Arnaz Jr., Stephanie Zimbalist) are reunited. A masquerade night moves the plot right along.

Guest Stars: Harold Gould as Vernon Crowler / Captain Merrill Stubing, Fernando Lamas as Bill Teague, Michele Lee as Miss Roz Rogers, Juliet Mills as Barbara Danver, Dan Rowan as Alan Danver, Adrienne Barbeau as Cathy Randall, John Schuck as Ox, Larry Storch as Elwood Riggs, Karen Valentine as Taffy Martino, Desi Arnaz Jr. as Steve Hollis, and Stephanie Zimbalist as Jenny Lang.

Other Guests: Lea Vernon as TV Reporter, John J. Fox as Chauffeur, and Richard Lineback as Steward.

Others: John Hugh McKnight as Passenger (uncredited), and Paul Van as Maitre D' (uncredited).

Note: This is the first time in which the opening credits included video images of the guest stars as well as names. This was the only time it happened in the first season but it would become a standard format in subsequent seasons.
1717"Winner Take Love"Jack ArnoldKevin Hartigan and David GarberJanuary 28, 1978 (1978-01-28)
"The Congressman Was Indiscreet"Jack Matcha
"Isaac's History Lesson"Fred Grandy and Bernie Kopell

A beauty contest on board ship divides a couple (Maureen McCormick, Bobby Sherman). A reporter (Vicki Lawrence) falls for a disgraced congressman (Dick Van Patten). A visiting college professor (Vernee Watson-Johnson) researching Black history disapproves of an older passenger's hambone moves – even though most of the others like it – and convinces Isaac to feel the same way until they find out to their embarrassment that the man (Scatman Crothers) is one of the greatest pitchers in Negro leagues history.

Guest Stars: Scatman Crothers as Virgil 'Scattergun' Gibson, Graham Jarvis as Waldo Linden, Vicki Lawrence as Robin Brandt, Dick Van Patten as Congressman John Whitcomb, Maureen McCormick as Suzy Corbett, Bobby Sherman as Rick Leonard, and Vernee Watson-Johnson as Stephanie Hayden (credited as Vernée Watson).

Other Guests: Priscilla Barnes as Jeanette Arnold (credited as Jeanette), Maria O'Brien as Rita Almerez (credited as Rita), Melissa Tennille as Alma Hodges (credited as Alma), and Marianne Marks as Teresa Chen (credited as Teresa).

Others: Paul DeCeglie as Passenger (uncredited), Bob Harks as Contest Judge (uncredited), and Monty O'Grady as Waiter (uncredited).
1818"Last of the Stubings"Jack ArnoldMichael NorellFebruary 4, 1978 (1978-02-04)
"Million Dollar Man"Steve Pritzker
"The Sisters"Ray Jessel

Captain Stubing's nephew turns out to be a klutz. An embezzler falls for a cop. Romance comes between two unmarried sisters.

Stubing's nephew (Peter Isacksen) comes on board to be trained to work on ships, like everyone in his family but doesn't exactly do a good job at whatever he is told to do. Eventually, he reveals a secret to the crew that he can't tell Stubing. A man who stole a million dollars (Frank Converse) hooks up with a female passenger (Marcia Strassman) but when he reveals what he did, she reveals that she's a cop and intends to turn him in when they return. Two sisters (Pat Crowley, Marion Ross) come aboard and when one sister is attracted to a male passenger (Brett Halsey), her sister is jealous because she feels neglected.

Guest Stars: Frank Converse as Bill Thompson, Marcia Strassman as Stephanie Lewis, Pat Crowley as Noreen Badger, Marion Ross as Rose Higby, Brett Halsey as Clark Tyler, and Peter Isacksen as L. Courtney Stubing IV.

Other Guests: Benny Baker as Grandad 'Jack Daniels' (credited without role).
1919"A Very Special Girl"Roger DuchownyJerry WinnickFebruary 11, 1978 (1978-02-11)
"Until the Last Goodbye"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"The Inspector"Bruce Howard

The crew is on its best behavior for an incognito cruise inspector while an elderly Russian man keeps asking the same phrase repeatedly. Illness affects an adoring couple (Susan Blanchard, Paul Burke). A children's book author (Jim Backus) tries to find inspiration on the cruise. Two girlfriends (Laurette Spang, Debralee Scott) cruise, and one is ignored by all the men on board while all the others hit on the other.

Guest Stars: Jim Backus as Mr. Marvin Waterman, Susan Blanchard as Sarah Lambert, Paul Burke as Brian Sherwood, Patti MacLeod (wife of Gavin MacLeod) as Mrs. Corwin, Debralee Scott as Jane Cole, Laurette Spang as Melanie Taylor, Bob Seagren as Mike Andrews, and Sal Viscuso as Doug Ketchum.

Other Guests: Jack Bernardi as Mr. Zidreczky and Don Bovingloh as Pianist (credited as Don Boevingloh).

Others: Henry Z. Jones Jr. as Ship's Inspector (uncredited).
2020"Memories of You"Richard KinonCarmen FinestraFebruary 13, 1978 (1978-02-13)
"Computerman"David Assael
"Parlez Vous?"Mark Fink

A matchmaker uses a computer to pair up the cruise guests. He also manipulates it to pair himself with Julie. American gold diggers pass themselves off as French. A New York ad executive and a long-lost love reunite.

Two American women (Barbi Benton, Susan Silo) pretend they are French, to get men and gifts. Julie is wooed by a man (Frankie Avalon) who runs a computer-dating service and offers his computer matchmaking for the Valentine's Day cruise. A woman (Patty Duke Astin) believes another passenger (Ricky Nelson), who has amnesia, is a former lost love.

Guest Stars: Patty Duke as Lilly Mackim (credited as Patty Duke Astin), Frankie Avalon as Nick Heider, Barbi Benton as Brigitte LeBlanc, Denny Evans as Sam Worth, Jamie Farr as Seymour, Ricky Nelson as Ted Wilcox / Alex Fowler (credited as Rick Nelson), and Carole White as Penny Jacobs (credited as Carole Ita White).

Other Guests: Shelley Long as Heather McKenzie (credited as Heather), Lawrence P. Casey as Daryl Matson (credited as Lawrence Casey; credited as Daryl), Susan Silo as Yvonne Boulanger (credited as Yvonne), Danny Dayton as Walt, and Georganne LaPiere as Betsy Carruthers (credited as Georganne La Piere; credited as Betsy).

Others: Tom Brumley as himself – Steel Guitarist.
2121"Taking Sides"Richard KinonHugh Wedlock, Jr.February 18, 1978 (1978-02-18)
"Going by the Book"Jerry Winnick
"A Friendly Little Game"Ray Brenner

An elder couple's (Audrey Meadows, Robert Mandan) marriage problems affect a young couple's (Diana Canova, Robert Urich) marriage; A passenger (Harvey Jason) tries to court a girl (Georgia Engel) who is being overprotected by Doc who happens to be a friend of her father; A passenger (Harry Morgan) pays his debts by playing cards with a marked deck.

Also guest starring: Priscilla Morill, Herb Voland
2222"A Selfless Love"Roger DuchownyPhil Foster and Marion ZolaFebruary 25, 1978 (1978-02-25)
"The Nubile Nurse"Barry Blitzer
"Parents Know Best"Fred S. Fox and Seaman Jacobs

A couple (Monty Hall and Janis Paige) takes their son (Mark Shera) along on the cruise, hoping he will end a relationship; A couple (Leslie Nielsen and Lynda Day George) rethink their romance; An ex-showgirl (Elaine Joyce) jeopardizes her nursing career.

Also guest starring: Laurie Prange, Marla Adams, Craig Littler, Dorothy Konrad, Joe E. Ross
2323"Musical Cabins"Allen BaronMichael NorellMay 6, 1978 (1978-05-06)
In order to claim an inheritance, a young bachelor (Paul Williams) has a week to marry; A widow (Michele Lee), posing as an adventuress, captures the Captain's heart; A chauvinist (Richard Gautier) angers his fiancée (Barbara Rhoades), who finds comfort in Doc; A tabloid reporter (Marcia Wallace) uses sex as the subject for her story.
2424"This Business of Love"Roger DuchownyHoward Albrecht & Sol WeinsteinMay 13, 1978 (1978-05-13)
"Crash Diet Crush"Ray Jessel
"I'll Never Fall in Love Again"Ann Gibbs & Joel Kimmel
A former prostitute (Caren Kaye) trying to overcome her past meets a nice man (Christopher George) but is threatened with exposure by a former client (Jack Carter) having troubles with his wife (Jayne Meadows). Captain Stubing reunites with an old flame (Jessica Walter). Two depressed widowed people (Annette Funicello, Michael Callan) find comfort in each other while avoiding an overly happy couple (Morey Amsterdam, Rose Marie).
2525"Pacific Princess Overtures"Allen BaronDawn Aldredge & Martin CohanMay 20, 1978 (1978-05-20)
"Gopher, the Rebel"Ray Jessel
"Cabin Fever"Ann Gibbs & Joel Kimmel
Gopher is encouraged by a young passenger (Eve Plumb) to stand up to Captain Stubing, with unexpected consequences; A man (Antonio Fargas) is caught cheating on his wife, by his neighbors – from home; A businessman (Gary Collins) convinces a widow (Diane Baker) to sell her late husband's business to a Japanese conglomerate, whose chairman (Pat Morita) is on board.

Season 2 (1978–79)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
26
27
1
2
"Marooned"Paul StanleyMichael NorellSeptember 16, 1978 (1978-09-16)
"The Search"Lee Aronsohn
"Issac's Holiday"Ben Joelson & Art Baer

Part 1: Captain Stubing's deputy turns out to be incompetent in his new role. The captain, Doc, Julie, Gopher, and some of the guests visit an island near Cabo San Lucas. They are taken hostage by a nutty hermit (John Astin) and caught in a hurricane. Gopher, who is anxious about his upcoming vacation, drives everyone crazy. Isaac sails on the ship as a passenger and hopes to impress a woman with his lies about being rich and famous. A passenger tracks down a woman who gave her up as a newborn and also meets a soap-opera actor.

Part 2: The captain and his marooned group struggle to survive on the island during a hurricane. The woman (Donna Mills) looking for her birth mother (Laraine Day) makes a startling discovery. Isaac tries to save the ship from the storm while trying to regain Mara's (Lola Falana) trust.

Guest Stars: Edie Adams as Maureen Buell, John Astin as David P. Crothers, Barbi Benton as Kiki Atwood, David Birney as Mike Adler, Norm Crosby as Wally the Bartender, Donna Mills as Jeannie Carter, Laraine Day as Vera Simpson, Lola Falana as Mara Carroll, Audra Lindley as Mrs. Worth, Dick Martin as Deputy Captain Cunningham, and Avery Schreiber as Everett Buell.

Other Guests: Gordon Connell as Douglas the chauffeur (credit only), and Chris Capen as Radio Officer (credit only).
283"Rocky"Allen BaronAnn Gibbs and Joel KimmelSeptember 23, 1978 (1978-09-23)
"Julie's Dilemma"Roger DuchownyBen Joelson and Art Baer
"Who's Who?"Roger DuchownyBob Fraser and Rob Dames

Julie's parents (Norman Fell and Betty Garrett) are getting divorced. An author (James Coco) and a censor (Dody Goodman) fall in love, unaware they are sharing the same cabin. A young girl (Melissa Gilbert) loses her tomboy image after receiving her first kiss.

Guest Stars: Jimmy Baio as Norman, James Coco as Marion Atkins, the Author, Norman Fell as Bill McCoy, Betty Garrett as Martha McCoy, Melissa Gilbert as Rosemary 'Rocky' Simpson, Dody Goodman as Patricia Seldon, Ellen Travolta as Norman's Mother, and Edward Winter as Rod Simpson.

Other Guests: Marla Adams as Arlene Simpson.

Others: Emmaline Henry as Love Interest for 'Billy Boy' (uncredited).
294"The Man Who Loved Women"Allen BaronHoward Albrecht and Sol WeinsteinSeptember 30, 1978 (1978-09-30)
"A Different Girl"Cynthia Santillo
"Oh, My Aching Brother"Bruce Howard

A man (David Doyle) makes a move on and falls in love with three passengers (Cathryn Damon, Brett Somers, Jo Ann Pflug), whom he doesn't know are traveling together. During separate introductions, they individually refer to him as 'Cornelious,' 'McNair,' and 'Vinny,' respectively. Captain Stubing's godson (Grant Goodeve) and his wife (Bess Armstrong) are cruising together after being separated for two years by his military duties overseas. Two brothers, Harold and Joe Nash (Sonny Bono and Marty Ingels) stage false injuries so they can sue the insurance company, but Harold has a change of heart when he meets a nice lady (Judy Landers).

Guest Stars: Grant Goodeve as Captain Dave Stanton, Bess Armstrong as Laura Stanton, Sonny Bono as Harold Nash, Marty Ingels as Joe Nash, Judy Landers as Rita, David Doyle as Alvin McNair, Cathryn Damon as Charlotte, Jo Ann Pflug as Bonnie Stokes, and Brett Somers as Anita Carmichael.
305"Julie's Aunt"Allen BaronBarry BlitzerOctober 14, 1978 (1978-10-14)
"Where Is It Written?"Lan O'Kun
"The Big Deal"James F. Henry

Captain Stubing's uncle (Red Buttons) makes efforts to be alone with Julie but is thwarted by her aunt – Gopher in disguise; A businessman (Allen Ludden) tries to close a deal, using his daughter (Mackenzie Phillips) as bait; The neglected wife (Hope Lange) of a publisher (Gene Barry) hopes to find inspiration for the remaining chapter of a book by romancing a novelist (Richard Mulligan).

Guest Stars: Sam Groom, Erik Estrada
316"Mike and Ike"Roger DuchownyFred Grandy and Bernie KopellOctober 21, 1978 (1978-10-21)
"The Witness"Roger DuchownyArnold Grossman
"The Kissing Bandit"Allen BaronFred Grandy and Bernie Kopell

A shy young man becomes a different person at night; a businessman learns a lesson about neglecting his family; a man believes he has better chances of surviving at sea than on trial.

A shy guy (Billy Crystal) dons a mask and goes around kissing every girl on the ship. Then, he meets a girl (Laurie Walters) with whom he connects. A couple (Marilyn McCoo, Billy Davis Jr.), who are friends of Isaac's and with whom they performed on the streets in their youth, are now successful and rich and have a young son (Todd Bridges). But his father spends more time on work than with his son. And a woman (Toni Tennille) follows a man (Robert Reed), whom she knows witnessed what happened to someone she cares about and urges him to come forward and tell what he saw.

Guest Stars: Billy Crystal as Newton Weems, Laurie Walters as Roberta Potter, Sharon Acker as Evelyn, Todd Bridges as Michael Jr., Marilyn McCoo as Lenore, Billy Davis Jr. as Michael Sr., Pat Carroll as Muriel, Nancy Kulp as Gert, Toni Tennille as Suzanne Henderson, and Robert Reed as Frank McLean.

Note: Isaac, Lenore, and Michael Sr. complete a song and dance scene later credited as "Our Language of Love," words by Fred Grandy and music by Ray Jessel.
327"Ship of Ghouls"Roger DuchownyMickey RoseOctober 28, 1978 (1978-10-28)

An illusionist is in such demand that he nearly misses what is in front of him; two recently reunited parents have trouble trying to stop their son from telling tall tales; Julie's model friend, scarred physically and psychologically by a car crash, is romanced by Gopher and Doc but is suspicious of their motives.

Guest Stars: Iris Adrian as The Amazing Alonzo Groupie, Charlie Aiken as Bobby Diller, Barbara Anderson as Karen Williamson, Joan Blondell as Ramona Bevans, Gary Collins as Mr. Diller, Jane Kean as The Amazing Alonzo Groupie, Mary Ann Mobley as Mrs. Diller, Bibi Osterwald as The Amazing Alonzo Groupie and Vincent Price as Wendell Mordan – 'The Amazing Alonzo.'

Other Guests: Maureen Reagan as Mrs. Moss and Larry Gelman as Harvey Greenswann (credited as Harvey).

Others: unknown girl (uncredited) as Lucy, daughter to Mrs. Moss and cruise ship friend to Billy Diller.
338"A Time for Everything"UnknownUnknownNovember 4, 1978 (1978-11-04)
"The Song Is Ended"
"Accidental Cruise"
"Anoushka"

A stuffy executive loosens up and falls in love with his secretary; a songwriter rekindles a wife's love for her husband; Captain Stubing takes charge of the orphaned child of his former love; a stern Russian cruise director gets a new image, to Doc's delight.

Sandy Beal (Jo Anne Worley) is a secretary secretly in love with her boss Victor Marshall (Soupy Sales). The two of them get drunk at an office party and take an "Accidental Cruise." In "The Song Has Ended," Charlie Godwin (Robert Goulet) is a former songwriter now unhappily married and working for an advertising agency. Once they board the ship, Charlie and his wife June (Juliet Mills) encounter his former partner Burt Buchanan (Richard Dawson), who has gone on to garner more fame than he had with Charlie. "A Time for Everything" reunites Captain Stubing with Dolores (Sandra Deel), whose sister Georgina was an old flame of Stubing's and died eight months earlier, leaving Georgina's daughter Vicki (Jill Whelan) in Dolores' care. Miss "Anoushka" Mishancov (Loretta Swit), the vodka-loving Commissar of Cruise Vessels for the Soviet Union, is on board and falls for Doc, after persuading Julie to help her become "slinky."

Guest Stars: Jo Anne Worley as Sandy Beal, Soupy Sales as Victor Marshall, Robert Goulet as Charlie Godwin, Juliet Mills as June Godwin, Richard Dawson as Bert Buchanan, Jill Whelan as Vicki Stubing, and Loretta Swit as Anoushka Mishancov.

Other Guests: Melendy Britt as Georgina and Sandra Deel as Dolores Strickland.

Others: Lawrence Moran as Jimmy (uncredited).

Note: This is the first appearance of Vicki.

Note: This is a 90-minute episode.
349"Till Death Do Us Part–Maybe"Allen BaronBen Joelson and Art BaerNovember 11, 1978 (1978-11-11)
"Locked Away"Howard Albrecht and Sol Weinstein
"Chubs"Loraine Despres

A widow (Vernee Watson-Johnson) who still hasn't gotten over her husband's death is followed by her husband's ghost (Jimmie Walker), who tries to fix her up with another passenger (Greg Morris). A divorced couple (Janet Leigh, Conrad Bain) sees their daughter (Jamie Lee Curtis) and her husband (Peter Coffield) off but get locked in one of the unused cabins. Gopher's sister (Melissa Sue Anderson) comes on board and makes a beeline for Doc.

Guest Stars: Vernee Watson-Johnson as Ellen Garner (credited as Vernee Watson), Jimmie Walker as The Late Mickey Garner, Greg Morris as Greg Elkins, Conrad Bain as Les, Jamie Lee Curtis as Linda, Janet Leigh as Gail, and Melissa Sue Anderson as Jennifer 'Chubs' Smith.

Other Guests: Peter Coffield as Wayne, Bebe Drake-Hooks as Mrs. Cory, Raymond Allen as Mr. Cory, and Deney Terrio as Floyd.
3510"Man of the Cloth"Richard KinonFred S. Fox and Seaman JacobsNovember 17, 1978 (1978-11-17) [1]
"Her Own Two Feet"Ann Gibbs and Joel Kimmel
"Tony's Family"Henry Colman

A minister falls for a Las Vegas exotic dancer, much to the dismay of a female parishioner, who attempts to break them up but causes a strain on her marriage; a man tries to help his wife overcome her denial over her blindness; the crew convinces the chief engineer to forgo his Thanksgiving holiday by having his entire family stow away on board the ship.

Guest Stars: June Allyson, Vivian Blaine, Peter Graves, Van Johnson, Roz Kelly, Larry Storch, Alan Young, Mitzi Hoag, Tony La Torre, Renata Vanni, Mario Bellini, Jennifer Surprenant, Kelly Greenwood
3611"Heads or Tails"Buddy TyneAnn Gibbs and Joel KimmelNovember 25, 1978 (1978-11-25)
"Mona of the Movies"Howard Albrecht and Sol Weinstein
"The Little People"Barry Blitzer
A movie queen (Rhonda Fleming) intimidates a businessman (Orson Bean); two swingers (Richard Gilliland, Adam Arkin) go after Julie and make a bet as to whom she will fall for; a man (Edward Albert) treats his parents to the cruise (Billy Barty, Patty Maloney) for their 25th wedding anniversary. He strikes up a romance with a lady from his work (Patty McCormack) until he finds she is uncomfortable around "little people", i.e. the man's parents.
3712"The Captain's Cup"Alan RafkinBen Joelson & Art BaerDecember 2, 1978 (1978-12-02)
"The Folks from Home"Fred Grandy & Bernie Kopell
"Legal Eagle"Gordon Farr

A woman in charge of the presentation of the Captain's Cup convinces an engineer to pose as the executive in charge so as not to disappoint Captain Stubing; Doc begins spending all of his time with an older couple from his hometown; a recently divorced man is paired up with his ex's divorce attorney.

The Captain is expecting a prestigious award but the presenter (Pat Harrington Jr.) may not be who he expects it to be. Doc becomes attached to an elderly couple (John McIntire, Jeanette Nolan) from his hometown, only to have to perform a life-threatening operation on the woman. A recently divorced man (Bert Convy) runs into the lawyer (Leigh Taylor-Young) who represented his ex-wife in the divorce.

Guest Stars: Pat Harrington Jr. as Hank Vosnick (credited as Pat Harrington), Florence Henderson as Diane DiMarzo, John McIntire as George Hancock, Jeanette Nolan as Gloria Hancock, Bert Convy as Danny Holt, and Leigh Taylor-Young as Ann Sterling (credited as Leigh Taylor Young).

Other Guests: Cisse Cameron as Amber, George Petrie as Dr. David Barnes (credited as Dr. Barnes), and Chris Capen as Radio Officer.
3813"El Kid"Allen BaronBarry BlitzerDecember 9, 1978 (1978-12-09)
"The Last Hundred Bucks"Ray Jessel
"Isosceles Triangle"Mark Fink

A couple and their friend meet a former marketing executive who is penniless and looking for work. A couple looking to adopt a child in Puerto Vallarta gets the sad news the biological parents had a change of heart but the director of the orphanage has another child in mind. A friend of Julie's is romanced by both Doc and the Captain; Isaac and Gopher take sides and even bet their last $100 on the outcome.

Guest stars: Dabney Coleman, Dena Dietrich, Dave Madden, Rue McClanahan, Gabriel Melgar, Heather Menzies, Connie Stevens, Robert Urich, Victor Millan, David Clover, Keith Allison
3914"Julie Falls Hard"Bob ClaverMichael NorellDecember 16, 1978 (1978-12-16)
"Double Wedding"Ray Jessel
"The Dummies"Lan O'Kun

A double wedding is in store for identical twins; A separated couple argues through their ventriloquist act; Julie settles an argument between two adolescent girls, to the pleasure of their father, and the girls then decide to fix up with him and Julie.

Julie falls in love with a man (Tony Roberts) and his daughters (Annrae Walterhouse, Melora Hardin). Will she leave the ship for Alaska? Twins (Cyb Barnstable, Trish Barnstable), unhappy with their prospective spouses (David Nelson, Fred Travalena), switch places. A separate couple (Ruth Buzzi, Sid Caesar) are assigned to the same cabin, so they and their ventriloquist dummies entertain the passengers.

Guest Stars: Tony Roberts as Jack Chenault, Priscilla Barnstable as Judy Barrett (credited as Cyb Barnstable), Patricia Barnstable as Joanie Barrett (credited as Trish Barnstable), David Nelson as Gary Gage, Fred Travalena as Ted Ashton, Ruth Buzzi as Patti Harmon, and Sid Caesar as Michael Harmon.

Other Guests: Annrae Waterhouse as Ashley Chenault (credited as Ashley) and Melora Hardin as Courtney Chenault (credited as Courtney).
4015"My Sister, Irene"Roger DuchownyTony WebsterJanuary 13, 1979 (1979-01-13)
"The 'Now' Marriage"Story by: Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein
Teleplay by: Ray Jessel
"Second Time Around"Tony Webster

A woman poses as her sister to avoid an old flame. An author tries to live up to the philosophies he espoused in his recent work. One of Doc's ex-wives hires an actor to pose as her fiancé to win him back.

Irene Austin (Martha Raye) agrees to meet her college classmate, Andy Hopkins (Ray Bolger), after 40 years. She then panics and tells him she's Irene's sister. Dr. Todd Gardiner (Peter Marshall) wrote a book about open marriage, but finds his union to Eleanor Gardiner (Barbara Rush) in jeopardy, as he gets close to a fellow passenger (Phyllis Davis). Doc's ex-wife (Tina Louise) arrives with a new fiancé (Lyle Waggoner).

Guest Stars: Martha Raye as Irene Austin, Ray Bolger as Andy Hopkins, Peter Marshall as Dr. Todd Gardiner, Barbara Rush as Eleanor Gardiner, Phyllis Davis as Nancy Bishop, Tina Louise as Betty Bricker, and Lyle Waggoner as Lance Wilson.
4116"Gopher's Opportunity"Roger DuchownySue Masters and John WalshJanuary 20, 1979 (1979-01-20)
"The Switch"Roger DuchownyLan O'Kun
"Home Sweet Home"Allen BaronRay Jessel and Natalie Schafer

Gopher's friend offers him a job at a plush hotel in Lake Havasu City, Arizona; Gopher considers it after an argument with the Captain. A magician's assistant is upset when he sends his brother to replace him in the act. A dowager is attracted to a cabin steward.

Guest Stars: Elaine Joyce as Melody Livingston, Melinda Naud as Maggie Walsh, Ron Palillo as Al Breyer, Bobby Van as Phil Livingston, Abe Vigoda as Charlie Fletcher, and Nancy Walker as Hetty Waterhouse.

Other Guests: Michael Gregory as Ken Breyer (credited as Ken).
4217"Second Chance"Allen BaronLee AronsohnJanuary 27, 1979 (1979-01-27)
"Don't Push Me"Barbara Evans
"Like Father, Like Son"Jerry Winnick

Isaac worries that a young woman on probation (Debbi Morgan), working in the gift shop, has stolen some jewelry. A henpecked man (Roddy McDowall) feels he's being pressured, by his girlfriend (Tammy Grimes), into marriage, against his will. A charming widower and his son (Robert Mandan, Randolph Mantooth) fall in love with the same woman (Cathy Lee Crosby).

Guest Stars: Debbi Morgan as Stephanie Jackson, Virginia Graham as Gift Shop Customer, Roddy McDowall as Fred Beery, Tammy Grimes as Christine, Robert Mandan as Woody Billingsley, Randolph Mantooth as Alan Billingsley, and Cathy Lee Crosby as Libby Hall.
43
44
18
19
"Disco Baby"Roger DuchownyRay JesselFebruary 3, 1979 (1979-02-03)
"Alas, Poor Dwyer"Barry Blitzer
"After the War"Carmen Finestra
"Ticket to Ride"Joyce Armor & Judie Neer
"Itsy Bitsy"Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein

Julie is driving everyone crazy since she is organizing her high school reunion on board ship:

  1. Julie's high school teacher is on board but is struggling with his alcoholism.
  2. A former boyfriend of hers is on board with her high school rival.
  3. The football quarterback is reunited with his former teammates.
  4. Another couple, who had moved to Canada for him to avoid the Vietnam War draft and recently returned under amnesty, meet another classmate who is in a wheelchair due to wounds received in the war.
  5. Doc romances one of Julie's classmates.
  6. Julie learns her recently divorced friend Wendy is on the cruise because an unknown admirer has sent her the cruise ticket.

Guest stars: Raymond Burr, Michael Cole, Kim Darby, Bob Denver, Conchata Ferrell, Christopher George, Lisa Hartman, Michael Lembeck, Kelly Monteith, John Rubinstein, Judi West, David Landsberg.

4520"Best of Friends"George TyneFred S. Fox and Seaman JacobsFebruary 10, 1979 (1979-02-10)
"Aftermath"Story by: Sue Masters and John Walsh , Teleplay By: Lee Aronsohn
"Dream Boat"Bruce Howard

Doc's old mentor from Johns Hopkins disapproves of his lifestyle while dealing with the loss of an arm in a car crash, not realizing his wife has become addicted to painkillers; a series of misunderstandings strains an engaged couple and the woman's best friend. A representative from the cruise ship Lorelei evaluates the Captain as a possible commanding officer for that ship.

Guest stars: Richard Anderson, Joyce Brothers, Hans Conried, Carol Lynley, Diana Muldaur, Ben Murphy, Donna Pescow, Mary Farrell, Starr Hester
4621"A Good and Faithful Servant"UnknownUnknownFebruary 17, 1979 (1979-02-17)
"The Secret Life of Burl Smith"
"Tug of War"

A vacationing chauffeur and his wealthy employer fall in love; a famous model causes love-smitten Gopher to fantasize that he is various flamboyant heroes; a separated couple vies for their son's affection; Reggie Jackson (as himself) can't convince anyone on board that he is who he says he is.

Note: This is a 90-minute episode.

Guest stars: John Mills, Hayley Mills, Juliet Mills, Telma Hopkins, David Hedison, Celeste Holm, Keith Mitchell.
4722"Love Me, Love My Dog"Roger DuchownyBarry BlitzerFebruary 24, 1979 (1979-02-24)
"Poor Little Rich Girl"Ben Joelson and Art Baer
"The Decision"Henry Colman

A terrier "protects" its mistress from the advances of a gentleman; a waitress inherits a fortune and finds her new life, and her former fiancé's renewed interest, a big adjustment; Isaac laments his ill-fated love affairs.

Guest stars: Debbie Allen, Dennis Cole, Fannie Flagg, Maren Jensen, Gene Rayburn, Cricket, Noah Keen.
4823"Funny Valentine"George TyneFred Grandy and Bernie KopellMarch 3, 1979 (1979-03-03)
"The Wallflower"Ben Joelson and Art Baer
"A Home is Not a Home"John V. Hanrahan and Tom Dagenais

A wallflower is secretly followed by a shy milquetoast; Stubing is charmed by a fortune-teller; two honeymooning retirees are unexpectedly joined by their overprotective children.

Guest stars: Warren Berlinger, Elinor Donahue, Patty Dworkin, Samantha Eggar, Arthur Godfrey, Minnie Pearl, Zane Lasky, Dorrie Thomson.
4924"Ages of Man"Richard KinonLsn O'KunMarch 10, 1979 (1979-03-10)
"Bo 'n Sam"Ben Joelson and Art Baer
"Families"Howard Albrecht and Sol Weinstein

Julie falls for an older man while an adolescent boy falls for her; two rival publishers clash while their children become romantic; the crew's plans for a present for their captain's anniversary keep hitting a huge snag.

Guest stars: Paul Burke, Arlene Dahl, Patrick Labyorteaux, Leslie Nielsen, Mark Shera, Philip Charles MacKenzie, Michael Tucci, Ellen Bry, James Dobson, James Hackett, Bill Smillie
5025"Murder on the High Seas"Richard KinonMargie PetersMarch 17, 1979 (1979-03-17)
"Sounds of Silence"Joyce Armor and Judie Neer
"Cyrano de Bricker"Howard Albrecht and Sol Weinstein

A rocker meets and falls in love with a deaf girl; a gambler in marital trouble gets Doc to tell his wife how he feels; Isaac mistakes a conversation by two writers about an upcoming mystery-murder novel as an actual plot to kill the captain.

Guest stars: Sonny Bono, Charlie Callas, Arte Johnson, Peter Lawford, Jill St. John, Dana Wynter, Sheila Lenham, James Dobson.
5126"April's Return"George TyneLee AronsohnMay 5, 1979 (1979-05-05)
"Super Mom"Tom Dunsmuir
"I'll See You Again"Lee Aronsohn

An old war buddy of the captain's is reunited with a long-lost love from that period; a couple on their second honeymoon have their four children with them; April (Charo), now a successful singer with the cruise line, tries her hand at cruise directing, without much success.

Other Guest stars: Cyd Charisse, Anne Meara, Craig Stevens, Jerry Stiller, Katy Kurtzman, Corey Feldman, Stephen Schnetzer, Speedy Zapata, Greg Robblee.
5227"Third Wheel"Gordon FarrLee AronsohnMay 12, 1979 (1979-05-12)
"Grandmother's Day"Ann Gibbs and Joel Kimmel
"Second String Mom"Lee Aronsohn

Gopher's parents visit but the father feels like a third wheel; a couple with five already grown children find out they will have a new addition to the family; two sisters are less than friendly to their new stepmother.

Guest stars: Ken Berry, Robert Cummings, Nanette Fabray, Beth Howland, Ethel Merman, Barry Nelson, Michele Tobin, Shelly Juttner.

Season 3 (1979–80)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
53
54
1
2
"Carol and Doug's Story"Roger DuchovnyBen Joelson & Art BaerSeptember 15, 1979 (1979-09-15)
"Peter and Alicia's Story"Ray Jessel
"Julie's Story"Lee Aronsohn
"Buddy and Portia's Story"Lan O'Kun

This wedding cruise takes place up the Alaska and British Columbia coastline:

  • The couple getting married (Mark Harmon, Lisa Hartman) have to deal with his interfering ex-girlfriend Natalie (Caren Kaye).
  • The groom's divorced parents (Ray Milland, Eleanor Parker) quarrel while he is suffering from terminal cancer and she has to declare bankruptcy. Both try to keep their problems from one another.
  • Julie is deciding on accepting Jack's (Tony Roberts) proposal (from Season 2 episode "Julie Falls Hard") while fending off the advances of the best man of this wedding (Donny Most).
  • The grandfather of the bride (Lorne Greene) and the aunt of the groom (Audra Lindley) fall in love and get married.

Other guest stars: Robert Lussier, Stephanie Steele, and Julia Duffy.

553"The Grass Is Always Greener"Alan RafkinJan JesselSeptember 22, 1979 (1979-09-22)
"Three Stages of Love"Tom Dunsmuir
"Oldies But Goodies"Rob Dames & Bob Fraser

A woman and her man-hunting daughter arrive on the ship, the mother is attracted to a disabled man but their relationship is hampered by his snobby and obnoxious aide. Julie thinks she's opted for the wrong career when she meets her happily married friend who took the cruise director course with her, especially when she feels that Capt. Stubing is overly friendly to the woman. A man feels that he and his wife are experiencing the three stages of love.

Guest stars: Amanda Blake, Karen Morrow, Barry Sullivan, Werner Klemperer, Eddie Mekka, Lani O'Grady, Joan Hackett, Adam Rich.
564"Doc, Be Patient"James SheldonHaskell BarkinSeptember 29, 1979 (1979-09-29)
"Dance with Me"James SheldonCarmen Finestra
"Going My Way"Alan RafkinBen Joelson & Art Baer

A vacationing doctor cares for an ailing Doc, and he falls for her; A former dancer asks her reluctant ex-partner to teach with her at her school in Germany—much to the annoyance of his new and younger partner; After being stood up, a woman brings her cab driver along on the cruise.

Guest stars: Starr Danias, Arlene Golonka, Buddy Hackett, Carol Lawrence, John Meehan, Susan Sullivan.
575"The Audit Couple"Jack ArnoldRob Dames & Bob FraserOctober 6, 1979 (1979-10-06)
"The Scoop"Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein
"My Boyfriend's Back"Joyce Armor & Judie Neer

An IRS agent Viola (Phyllis Diller) comes on board to audit the Captain. A celebrity Jackie (Joyce DeWitt) tries to avoid a tabloid reporter (Ray Buktenica) trying to uncover her secret. Newlyweds Danny and Patricia (Richard Kline, Jennifer Salt) discover their ex Jay (Lyle Waggoner) is also on the cruise and wants to win her back.

Other guest stars: Shane Butterworth, David Matthau, Virginia Hawkins (uncredited). Richard Kline and Joyce DeWitt also starred in Three's Company .
586"Gopher's Greatest Hits"Alan RafkinLee AronsohnOctober 13, 1979 (1979-10-13)
"One Rose a Day"Henry Colman
"The Vacation"Ann Gibbs and Joel Kimmel
Gopher agrees to take over for a sick performer but he finds out that his vocal cords are not the most entertaining factor in his act. Two sisters (Joanna Cassidy & Jaye P. Morgan) who usually take the cruise together are joined by one sister's husband Byron (Conrad Janis). When he finds out about the prior trips they have taken, he learns more about trust in the institution of marriage. When a widow Janet (Martha Scott) meets the man Henry (Don Ameche) responsible for sending her a remembrance even after her husband's death, she is in for a heartrending surprise.
597"The Reunion"George TyneBen Joelson and Art BaerOctober 20, 1979 (1979-10-20)
"Haven't I Seen You?"Lee Aronsohn
"Crew Confessions"Bob Fraser and Rob Dames
Isaac has trouble on the high seas when the Love Boat crew discovers he has included some racy tales about them in his new novel. A man (Don Knotts) who closely resembles a celebrity starts to enjoy his new identity when a strikingly beautiful passenger (Julie Newmar) showers him with love. A husband and wife (Jane Wyatt and Jean Pierre Aumont) are reunited after being separated during World War II.
608"Play by Play"James SheldonBarry BlitzerOctober 27, 1979 (1979-10-27)
"Cindy"Michael Norell
"What's a Brother For?"Tom Dunsmuir
Gopher plays fairy godmother to a girl (Melissa Sue Anderson) vacationing with the proverbial wicked step-family (Carolyn Jones, Rhonda Bates, & Lila Kent) and gets her an audition with the Prince of Pop (Frank Sinatra Jr.). A competing couple (Christopher George, Linda Day George) do athletic feats to see who is the weaker sex. A man (Tom Hallick) traveling with his invalid brother (Patrick Wayne) meets a lovely woman (Joan Van Ark) but his budding romance with her is nearly ruined by his feeling of neglecting his brother – which the brother does little to discourage.
619"Trial Romance"Gordon FarrTony WebsterNovember 3, 1979 (1979-11-03)
"Never Say Goodbye"Lee Aronsohn
"A New Woman"Howard Albrecht and Sol Weinstein

The Captain and Vicki (Jill Whelan) are reunited now that he has confirmation of what they have long suspected. An older woman (Gale Storm) who wants to "get with it" seeks advice from Julie, but the coaching backfires when Rose falls for Doc leaving one suitor behind (Louis Nye). He on the other hand mistakes Julie's attempts to fix him up with the lady as affection for him and feels uncomfortable with too young an admirer. A man and a woman (Vic Tayback and Jo Ann Pflug) who were on the same deadlocked jury meet again. Unfortunately, the two can't stand each other because of personal idiosyncrasies, but make the most of the situation on the high seas.

Also guest starring Sandra Deel.
62
63
10
11
"Critical Success"Roger DuchownyBen Joelson & Art BaerNovember 10, 1979 (1979-11-10)
"The Love Lamp Is Lit"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"Take My Boyfriend, Please"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"Rent a Family"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"The Man in Her Life"Margie Peters

This takes place during a charity cruise involving The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders.

  • A bachelor executive hires actors to pose as his family to impress his boss and wife who don't know of his status. He however falls for one of the cheerleaders.
  • A beautiful movie star is on board to be the chairperson for the ship's charity cruise. However, once on board, she runs into the dean of American film and drama critics who have never given Miss Logan a good review. Once the two get together it's a contest of digs, and a surprise happening between the two.
  • One of the cheerleaders gets her friends to spend time with a persistent suitor to get him out of her hair. However, when one of them begins spending too much time with him, she starts to re-evaluate her relationship.
  • A man and a woman search for a supposedly hidden treasure on board.

Guest stars: Bill Daily, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr., Jackie Earle Haley, John Hillerman, Gunilla Hutton, Patsy Kelly, Roz Kelly, Larry Linville, Dina Merrill, Ginger Rogers, Natalie Schäfer, Stephen Shortridge, William Windom

6412"The Brotherhood of the Sea"George TyneJay GrossmanNovember 17, 1979 (1979-11-17)
"Letter to Babycakes"Howard Merrill
"Daddy's Pride"Lee Aronsohn

To keep Julie from finding out about her surprise birthday party, Gopher, Isaac, and Doc invent a phony fraternity to keep her busy and devise frat-like procedures for her to join. This interferes with her romance with a passenger (Christopher Connelly). A womanizer (Demond Wilson) has his friend (Jimmie Walker) take responsibility when his girlfriend (Telma Hopkins) finds a letter from another woman in his jacket. A young gymnast's (Nancy McKeon) whole cruise is taken up by her father-coach (Alex Cord).

Other guest stars: Sydney Goldsmith, Stephen Manley and Sid Gould as Sidney The Waiter.
6513"Not Now, I'm Dying"Alan RafkinHaskell BarkinNovember 24, 1979 (1979-11-24)
"Too Young to Love"Roger DuchownyStory by: Lee Aronsohn
Teleplay by: Gordon Farr
"Eleanor's Return"Alan RafkinRay Jessel

A woman whom Stubing likes (Barbara Rush) comes on board but before he could make a move she hooks up with another man (Jon Cypher). A friend of Doc's (Barbi Benton) comes on board with her boyfriend (Dack Rambo). Now she wants a commitment but the guy keeps on making excuses to the point of faking an illness. Doc tries to help her by calling his bluff but discovers he truly is sick. And an underage couple (Timothy Patrick Murphy and Cristen Kauffman) comes on board to lose their virginity together. The girl's father (Frank Aletter) who's an exec of the line tells Stubing to make sure nothing happens between them. And Stubing lays that task on Gopher.

Also guest starring Sid Gould.
6614"The Stimulation of Stephanie"Allen BaronBen Joelson and Art BaerDecember 1, 1979 (1979-12-01)
"Life Begins at 40"Lee Aronsohn
"The Next Step"Story by: Bob Fraser & Rob Dames and Gordon Farr
Teleplay by: Gordon Farr
A lady about to turn 40 (Jo Anne Worley) has planned her upcoming wedding down to every detail except one – the groom. She hopes to find one on the cruise. A semi-retired NFL star (Rosey Grier) is trying to contemplate his post-NFL future with his wife (Melba Moore). A college professor (Dick Martin) trying to evaluate sexual stimulation with his student (Char Fontane) does not see that he is the one stimulating her. In the meantime, Doc romances a passenger (Judy Landers).
6715"The Harder They Fall"Richard KinonCarmen FinestraDecember 8, 1979 (1979-12-08)
"The Spider Serenade"Fred Grandy
"Next Door Wife"Tony Webster
Gopher falls for a married, but separated, lady (Jill St. John). A man (James MacArthur) traveling with his fiancée (Susan Buckner) finds his ex-wife (Joanna Pettet) in the cabin next door. Two cruise line execs (Milton Berle, Alan Hale Jr.) were former middleweights who knocked out the referee. They decide to settle things once and for all, to the disgust of their wives (Nancy Kulp, Sheila MacRae). Unfortunately, history repeats itself as they succeed in knocking out Stubing. Also starring Robert Sampson.
6816"Making the Grade"Gordon FarrBen Joelson and Art BaerDecember 15, 1979 (1979-12-15)
"The Gift"Don Segall
"Doc's 'Ex' Change"Marc Sheffler

A 12-year-old resents the romance between his mother (Jessica Walter) and his teacher (Richard Gautier); a financially troubled man (Sonny Bono) finds $2,000 in a borrowed coat; Doc and his ex-wife (Juliet Prowse) realize they're still married.

Other guest stars: Kaye Ballard, Ronee Blakley, Red Buttons, Johnny Timko
6917"April's Love"George TyneTony WebsterJanuary 12, 1980 (1980-01-12)
"We Three"Ben Joelson and Art Baer
"Happy Ending"Tony Webster
The crew are quite suspicious of April's (Charo) manager-fiancé (Forrest Tucker). A divorcing script-writing couple (Don Adams and Juliet Mills) are trying to finish their script but the man is having second thoughts about the divorce. A woman (Marjorie Lord) and her adopted daughter (Laurie Walters) find themselves on the cruise with the daughter's birth father (Ross Martin) but the girl was told both her birth parents were deceased.
70
71
18
19
"Kinfolk"Roger DuchownyLee AronsohnJanuary 19, 1980 (1980-01-19)
"Sis and the Slicker"Lee Aronsohn
"Moonlight and Moonshine"Lee Aronsohn
"Too Close for Comfort"Lee Aronsohn
"The Affair"Lan O'Kun

A singer (Donny Osmond) is ashamed of his family, who arouses the curiosity of a novelist; two passengers (Robert Guillaume, Pam Grier) cheat on their mates; Captain Stubing invites the crew into his suite when their quarters are flooded.

Other guest stars: Loni Anderson, Eve Arden, Randall Carver, Rich Little, Denise Nicholas, Slim Pickens, Richard Paul, Marion Ross and Richard Roundtree. Note: Pam Grier is listed as "Pamala Grier" in the opening credits.
7220"Rent a Romeo"Roger DuchownyR.S. AllenJanuary 26, 1980 (1980-01-26)
"Matchmaker, Matchmaker"Anitra Earle
"Y' Gotta Have Heart"R.S. Allen
Doc's attempts to spend time alone with his lady (Misty Rowe) are impeded by her emotionally unstable sister (Vicki Lawrence) so he gets a playboy friend (Joe Namath) to romance her. Vicki supports a boy (Mark James) who is trying to reunite his divorced parents (Ja'net DuBois, Cleavon Little); a woman (Brett Somers) prescribes a slow pace for her husband (Phil Harris), who is recovering from surgery.
7321"The Remake"Richard KinonLee AronsohnFebruary 2, 1980 (1980-02-02)
"The Perfect Match"Eric Gethers
"The Captain's Ne'er Do Well Brother"Casey Keller and Richard Albrecht
The Captain is not very thrilled to have his black-sheep brother Marshall (O.D. Warbux) on the cruise, especially when he romances a wealthy oil magnate (Diane Ladd). A woman (Connie Stevens) follows a handsome man (Kent McCord) on board because she is convinced he is the perfect man to father her baby. Julie's widowed aunt (Florence Henderson) becomes convinced she sees her late husband's double (James Broderick).
7422"Not So Fast, Gopher"Gordon FarrGordon FarrFebruary 9, 1980 (1980-02-09)
"Haven't We Met Before?"Fred S. Fox and Seaman Jacobs
"Seoul Mates (aka Foreign Exchange)"Story by: Tony Webster and Lee Aronsohn
Teleplay by: Tony Webster

Gopher's widowed mother (Ethel Merman) tries to hide her grief from her son; a comic (Johnny Yune) falls for a reporter (Momo Yashima) doing a story on him; a waiter (Nicholas Hammond) pretends to be a banker to win over a jet-setter (Hayley Mills).

Also guest starring The Hudson Brothers: Bill Hudson, Brett Hudson, and Mark Hudson, Gene Rayburn
7523"Another Time, Another Place"Allen BaronHenry ColmanMarch 1, 1980 (1980-03-01)
"Doctor Who"Evelyn Marienberg
"Gopher's Engagement"Harvey Bullock
A mother (Audrey Meadows) thinks Gopher would make a good suitor for her daughter (Maureen McCormick); a woman (Phyllis Davis) mistakes a professor (Arte Johnson) for a sex expert (Bert Parks); a journalist (Dennis Morgan) does not know his high-school friend (Jane Wyman) is a nun.
7624"Hey, Jealous Lover"Roger DuchownyRay JesselMarch 15, 1980 (1980-03-15)
"Tres Amigos"Tony Webster
"Dumb Luck"Ben Joelson and Art Baer

Julie helps a brilliant, but plain-looking woman become a glamor queen. Vicki and a young passenger try to help out a stowaway and a very jealous man accuses crew members of making passes at his wife.

Guest stars: Shelley Hack, Kevin Tighe, Ronnie Scribner, Tony Ramirez, Jennifer Darling, John Gabriel, James Gregory, Jayne Meadows
7725"Celebration"Richard KinonHarvey BullockMarch 29, 1980 (1980-03-29)
"Captain Papa"Story by: Lee Aronsohn
Teleplay by: Ruth Brooks Flippen
"Honeymoon Pressure"Sylvia Hecht

The crew tries to impress a social worker (Lois Nettleton) aboard to determine if Stubing is a good parent; a mobster leader's (Frank Campanella) daughter and her husband (Eve Plumb, Sal Viscuso) honeymoon in the shadow of two bodyguards (Norman Alden, Richard Bakalyan); Isaac suspects a free-spending bank guard (Noah Beery Jr.) who is traveling with his wife (Alice Faye). Note: Richard Bakalyan is credited as Dick Bakalyan.

Also guest starring Alice Nunn.
7826"Vicki's First Love"George TyneLou PatrickApril 5, 1980 (1980-04-05)
"High Cost of Loving"R.S. Allen
"Accident Prone"Jill Baer and Rick Shaw

An accident victim (Alan Feinstein) and the woman (Britt Ekland) who caused it keep their distance; Vicki tries to look shapely to catch a singer's (Rex Smith) eye; a palimony victim (Steve Kanaly) wants to avoid new relationships.

Other guest stars: Catherine Campbell, Robin Eisenman, Shauna Sullivan
7927"The Invisible Maniac"George TyneHarvey BullockApril 19, 1980 (1980-04-19)
"September Song"R.S. Allen
"Peekaboo"Harvey Bullock

A model (BernNadette Stanis) uses Isaac to make her husband (Clifton Davis) jealous; a lawyer (David Hasselhoff) wants to marry a colleague (Shelley Fabares) who is afraid to commit due to the ten-year difference in their ages; a woman (Peggy Cass) thinks a carefree attitude will save her marriage from boredom.

Other guest stars: Gordon Jump, Jane Withers and Ann B. Davis
8028"No Girls for Doc"UnknownUnknownMay 3, 1980 (1980-05-03)
"Marriage of Convenience"
"The Caller"
"Witness for the Prosecution"

A widow must make a serious decision about her friend, a woman being bothered by a mystery caller. The male members of the crew are shocked when Doc swears off women, so challenge him to a bet. A man who has had a gorgeous young woman in protective custody falls for her.

Note: This is a 90-minute episode.

Guest stars: James MacArthur, Mildred Natwick, Helen Hayes, Maurice Evans, John McCook, Christopher Norris, Larry Wilcox, Catherine Bach, Martin Short

Season 4 (1980–81)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
811"Sergeant Bull"Roger DuchownyCarmen FinestraOctober 25, 1980 (1980-10-25)
"Friends and Lovers"Steve Hattman & Dave Hackel
"Miss Mother"Ann Gibbs & Joel Kimmel
A young woman (Shelley Smith) falls for a nice man (Dennis Cole) but is afraid to tell him she is pregnant. Three army buddies (Nipsey Russell, Harvey Lembeck and Jack Somack) come to regret reuniting with their old sergeant (Vic Tayback) when he begins running the reunion like a boot camp, so they fix him up with a housekeeper (Doris Roberts). Gopher gets Julie to pose as his girlfriend to impress his old college fraternity friend (Tom Hanks), but complications develop between the two co-workers.
82
83
2
3
"The Family Plan"Roger DuchownyFred S. Fox & Seaman JacobsNovember 1, 1980 (1980-11-01)
"The Promoter"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"May the Best Man Win"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"Forever Engaged"Tony Webster
"The Judges"Tony Webster

This trip revolves around a "Marriage-a-Thon" special of 50 couples set to make their vows. The cruise begins in the US Virgin Islands and ends in Los Angeles. Sights include Curaçao and the Panama Canal. The promoter of the marriage cruise is trying to reconcile with his wife, but when he makes a crooked deal with one of the couples, he is in danger of losing his wife to Captain Stubing. Doc tricks Gopher into being a contestant judge but then discovers the other two judges are attractive women who vie for Gopher's attention. Another couple has a reputation for being perpetually engaged. Julie's old friend Marv is supposed to be the best man in the mass wedding, but the groom runs off with an ex-girlfriend. Marv has the burden of telling the bride about her groom, only to fall in love with her himself. A groom's father and bride's mother attempt to talk their children out of marrying, only to fall in love themselves. The pinnacle of the voyage is the beautiful mass wedding. Gopher finds himself in hot water in Curaçao when he runs a pharmaceutical errand for Doc, who sent him so he could be alone with the attractive female judges. Gopher gets even in the closing scene.

Guest stars: Darren McGavin, Debbie Reynolds, Peter Graves, Brian Kerwin, Erin Moran, Charlene Tilton, Donny Most, Rue McClanahan, Ted Knight, Ann Jillian, Dawn Wells, Kathie Browne
844"The Major's Wife"Roger Duchowny Pat Fielder November 8, 1980 (1980-11-08)
"The Oilman Cometh" R.S. Allen & Harvey Bullock
"Target Gopher"Fred S. Fox & Seaman Jacobs
"Strange Honeymoon" R.S. Allen & Harvey Bullock

The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders come aboard. Gopher loses his job because the promoter becomes jealous when the cheerleader that he is interested in likes Gopher and not him. A Saudi oil sheik mistakes his gift from the promoter's assistant to be one of the cheerleaders. A man and his bride-to-be share the honeymoon with his best man. An Air Force officer and his Japanese-born wife find themselves confronted by his ex-girlfriend.

Note: This is a 90-minute episode.

Guest stars: David Cassidy, Al Corley, Robert Culp, Pat Harrington, Nobu McCarthy, Mark Pinter, Jo Ann Pflug.
85
86
5
6
"The Mallory Quest" Richard Kinon Stephen Kandel & Harvey BullockNovember 15, 1980 (1980-11-15)
"Julie, the Vamp"R.S. Allen & Harvey Bullock
"The Offer"R.S. Allen

On a Caribbean cruise, famous author Mallory (Pernell Roberts) invites several people to help find his nephew with the promise of a huge reward. His aggravated wife (Gayle Hunnicutt) leaves him and finds comfort with Doc. One of the participants (Skip Stephenson) is about to donate a kidney to his brother but is being followed by his brother's fiancée (Maren Jensen). Another member (Jimmie Walker) is trying to find his dream girl on the cruise. The boyfriend (Peter Lupus) of another member of the quest (Connie Stevens) is suspicious of Mallory's motives. A jealous woman (Lani O'Grady) accuses Julie of trying to steal her fiancé (Bart Braverman), whom Julie had known in college. As the quest for Mallory's nephew (Gregg Robblee) continues, the people involved become suspicious and eventually make Mallory confess his real motives. A repentant Mallory tries to reconcile with his wife. A mysterious man (Sorrell Booke) begins following them. The kidney donor and the fiancėe become attracted to each other. Julie's friend and his girlfriend continue to drive her crazy.

Other guest stars: Dick Van Patten, Walter Slezak, Patti Macleod, James Dobson.
877"The Horse Lover"Roger DuchownyUnknownNovember 22, 1980 (1980-11-22)
"Secretary to the Stars"
"Julie's Decision"

In preparation for a steeplechase race in Mexico, one of the racers (Allen Ludden) spends more time with his horse than with his wife (Betty White), who finds comfort in the man's business partner (David Doyle). A Hollywood actress (Loni Anderson) disguises herself as her secretary to obtain privacy but ends up falling for a reporter (Charles Frank) sent to interview her. A wealthy racer (Robert Stack) falls for Julie and proposes to her. Gopher and Isaac stable a horse on board. The Village People (as themselves) also have a horse in the race.

Note: This is a 90-minute episode.
888"The Baby Alarm"Ray AustinLan O'KunNovember 29, 1980 (1980-11-29)
"Tell Her She's Great"Tony Webster
"Matchmaker, Matchmaker Times Two"Fred S. Fox and Seaman Jacobs
Isaac gets the crew to bolster his stagestruck aunt's (Isabel Sanford) ego, which turns her into an outrageous prima donna and upsets his uncle (Mel Stewart). Two sets of parents (Farley Granger, Joan Lorring, Terry Moore and Troy Donahue) go overboard trying to spark a romance between their respective children (Lorenzo Lamas and Melissa Sue Anderson). An unwed mother's (Susan Howard) infant son has an unusual way of showing his disapproval to men who try to romance her.
899"She Stole His Heart"Richard KinonJack TurleyDecember 6, 1980 (1980-12-06)
"Return of the Captain's Brother"Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller
"Swag and Mag"Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein

A kleptomaniac (Joan Van Ark) meets a psychiatrist (Stephen Keep Mills) who tries to help her but when they fall for each other, he keeps his distance. A television star (Ron Ely) whom Vicki adores comes on board with his girlfriend-agent (Erin Gray) but has to deal with an overbearing passenger (William Boyett). The Captain's brother comes on the cruise to introduce the woman he is going to marry (Arlene Dahl), but an ex (Zsa Zsa Gabor) follows, determined to win him back.

Also guest starring Sonny Wilde as the Captain's youngest brother.
9010"Boomerang"Richard KinonLou PatrickDecember 13, 1980 (1980-12-13)
"Captain's Triangle"Ken Hecht
"Out of This World"Jill Baer and Christopher Vane
Gopher and a passenger (Tom Smothers) believe a librarian (Helen Reddy) is actually a space alien. A model (Pamela Sue Martin) pretending to be a married woman learns a lesson from two bachelors (Guich Koock and Barry Van Dyke). The Captain's ex-girlfriend (Sue Anne Langdon) tries to seduce him even though she is married to a former captain friend of his (Monte Markham).
9111"That's My Dad"Allen BaronHudson Hickman & Alfred MonacellaDecember 20, 1980 (1980-12-20)
"The Captain's Bird"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"Captive Audience"Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller

The Captain gets Vicki a parrot for Christmas, but it hasn't been trained to talk, and Gopher's and Isaac's efforts to train it prove disastrous. A stowaway (Meeno Peluce) convinces the crew that a playboy passenger (Dirk Benedict) is his father. An estranged father and son (Allan Jones and Jack Jones) resist their wives' (Dorothy Lamour & Laraine Stephens) efforts to reunite them.

Other guest stars: Beth Scheffel and Robert Aguayo.
9212"Doc's Dismissal"Richard KinonTony Webster & Richard Albrecht & Casey KellerJanuary 3, 1981 (1981-01-03)
"The Frugal Pair"Fredi Towbin
"The Girl Next Door"Christopher Vane & Jill Baer

A couple celebrating their 40th anniversary fight nearly break apart. A woman fed up with her husband's constant ogling of other women attempts to use Doc to make him jealous, with unfortunate consequences. A man suspecting his girlfriend of cheating convinces the woman in the cabin next door that he is a CIA agent tracking down KGB operatives.

Guest stars: Lew Ayres, Janet Gaynor, Alex Cord, Jessica Walter, Sal Viscuso, Lynda Goodfriend, Denise DuBarry, Stephen Shortridge, Bobby Justin (uncredited).
9313"Isaac's Secret"Bob SweeneyLloyd J. SchwartzJanuary 10, 1981 (1981-01-10)
"Seal of Approval"Madora McKenzie & Andy Ruben
"The Curse of the Dumbrowskis"Ray Allen & Harvey Bullock

Isaac is afraid to tell his former teacher (Lillian Gish) that he is just a bartender, so Gopher gets him to pose as the ship's first officer. Shirley the Seal goes overboard when she spots her trainer (Donald O'Connor) with another woman (Georgia Engel). A woman (Florence Henderson), convinced of her impending death, tries to find a new wife for her husband (Jeffrey Tambor).

Other guest stars: Christina Hart and Reb Brown
9414"From Here to Maternity"Howard MorrisFred S. Fox and Seaman JacobsJanuary 17, 1981 (1981-01-17)
"Jealousy"Sid Morse
"The Trigamist"Tony Webster

A judge finds herself attracted to the man whom she had placed on probation for polygamy. Vicki is jealous when her father is attracted to a beautiful passenger. An expectant couple pesters Doc while he tries to court another passenger.

Guest stars: Murphy Cross, Michael Young, Nancy Walker, George Gobel, Rebecca Holden, Pat Crowley.
9515"First Voyage, Last Voyage"Roger DuchownySi RoseJanuary 17, 1981 (1981-01-17)
"April the Ninny"Art Baer and Ben Joelson
"The Loan Arranger"Jay Grossman

April (Charo)'s becomes a nanny to the two children of a TV sportscaster. A loan shark sends a man to collect an outstanding debt from a passenger. A young woman traveling with her parents meets and falls in love with a man, but she does not know that she is dying from leukemia.

Guest stars: Larry Linville, Rachel Jacobs, Alex Woodard, Kathleen Nolan, Maureen McCormick, Richard Kline, Lisa Hartman, Erik Stern, Jay Thomas, Dody Goodman, Ty Hardin.
9616"Gopher's Bride"Richard KinonLen Janson and Chuck MenvilleJanuary 24, 1981 (1981-01-24)
"Love with a Married Man"Sid Morse
"Not Tonight, Jack!"R.S. Allen and Harvey Bullock

Isaac and Doc compete for the affection of a girl (Marie Laurin) to whom they have been writing joke love letters under Gopher's name. A couple (Dana Wynter, Paul Burke) drift apart overwork habits. The man whose wife is too busy for him finds another love (Susan Oliver). A man (Patrick Wayne) is displaced after his furious girlfriend (Trish Stewart) discovers they were to share quarters.

Other guest stars: Pamela Jean Bryant and Paul Gale.
9717"Lose One, Win One"Jack ArnoldSid MorseJanuary 31, 1981 (1981-01-31)
"The $10,000 Lover"Jill Baer and Christopher Vane
"Mind My Wife"Sid Morse
A woman (Dorian Lopinto) traveling with her fiancé (Sam Chew Jr.) meets a man (Steve Marachuk) who claims to have known her from high school. A man (Ron Palillo) is on the verge of setting a record for having intimate relations with the most women but finds true love with a fellow passenger (Gina Hecht), causing distress for the keeper of stats for the world-record book (James Darren). Doc must fend off the advances of the love-starved wife (Jill St. John) of his best friend from college (Jim McKrell).
9818"Aquaphobic"Roger DuchownyR.S. Allen and Harvey BullockFebruary 7, 1981 (1981-02-07)
"Humpty Dumpty"Ruth Brooks Flippen
"The Starmaker"Ted Lange and Jean Ford

Isaac tries to impress a visiting concert promoter with his singing skills and convinces three maids (the Pointer Sisters) to act as his backup. A former football star has a romance with Julie. A man is forced by his wife to take a cruise to overcome his fear of water.

Guest stars: Ruth, Anita, and June Pointer, Jason Hervey, Suzanne Kent, Louis Nye, Audra Lindley, David Hasselhoff, and Jeff Cooper.
9919"Return of the Ninny"Roger DuchownyArt Baer and Ben JoelsonFebruary 14, 1981 (1981-02-14)
"Split Personality"Tony Webster
"Touchdown Twins"Lee Goldstein

April (Charo) and her charges accidentally find themselves on board while her employer and his new fiancée set sail. Gopher's college friend tries to please both his boss and the boss' daughter, not knowing they are father and daughter. A man falls for the mother of his old college friend.

Other Guest stars: Michael Lembeck, Larry Linville, Samantha Eggar, Vincent Van Patten, Rachel Jacobs, Laurette Spang, Ralph Bellamy, Alex Woodard, Natasha Martell, Philip Brown.
10020"Quiet, My Wife's Listening"Harry MastrogeorgeTony WebsterFebruary 21, 1981 (1981-02-21)
"Eye of the Beholder"Sid Morse
"The Nudist from Sunshine Gardens"Evelyn Marienberg

A self-pitying blind woman is romanced by a gentle farmer. A man traveling with his new girlfriend is convinced that his estranged wife has planted bugs in his cabin. Gopher's attempts to prohibit a woman from sunbathing nude are blocked by a lawyer who feels her rights are being denied.

Guest stars: Leslie Uggams, David Hedison, Dick Martin, Barbi Benton, Peter Haskell, Mary Ann Mobley, Judith Chapman, Thelma Carpenter.
10121"Clothes Make the Girl"Earl BellamyLan O'KunFebruary 28, 1981 (1981-02-28)
"Black Sheep"Fred Grandy and Jan Gough Grandy
"Hometown Doc"Haskell Barkin

Isaac's shady uncle (Demond Wilson) is shadowed by a government agent (Robert Ginty). A crew member (Larry Breeding) pretends to be a rich passenger to please the mother (Lee Meriwether) of his love interest (Kyle Aletter). Doc's old friend (Randolph Powell) introduces Doc to his fiancée (Cindy Morgan) but tells him that he's not going to practice medicine in their hometown, so Doc decides to resign and fill the role himself.

Other guest stars: Steve Doubet, Vernee Watson-Johnson and John Beradino
10222"Sally's Paradise"Earl BellamyR.S. Allen and Harvey BullockMarch 7, 1981 (1981-03-07)
"I Love You Too, Smith"Fred Grandy
"Mama and Me"R.S. Allen and Harvey Bullock

Gopher has a love-hate relationship with a customs official who is traveling with her boyfriend. A young man is reunited with an old girlfriend, but his mother has someone else in mind for him at home. The manager of the gift shop has her hands full with all three of her fiancés on board.

Guest stars: Joanna Pettet, Christopher Pennock, Eddie Mekka, Joan Prather, Sylvia Sidney, Juliet Mills, Gary Conway, Pedro Armendariz Jr., Kenneth Kimmins.
10323"The Duel"Ray AustinEvelyn MarienbergMarch 14, 1981 (1981-03-14)
"Two for Julie"Barbara Allyn
"Aunt Hilly"Lou Patrick
Two toymaking engineers (Ken Kercheval and Dack Rambo) traveling with their boss (Don Ameche) vie for Julie's affections. Captain Stubing's aunt (Olivia de Havilland) and uncle (Joseph Cotten) visit to meet Vicki. Doc is challenged to a duel by a man (Alejandro Rey) whose girlfriend (Linda Cristal) is sweet on Doc.
10424"That Old Gang of Mine"Richard KinonR.S. Allen and Harvey BullockApril 11, 1981 (1981-04-11)
"Love with a Skinny Stranger"R.S. Allen and Harvey Bullock
"Vicki and the Gambler"Sid Morse

A woman dating a man who was once obese now has to deal with a romantic rival. A professional gambler makes friends with Vicki. A group of aging crooks meets to plan one last heist (Jack Gilford played a similar character in the 1967 film Who's Minding the Mint? , for which R.S. Allen and Harvey Bullock also wrote).

Guest stars: Kaye Ballard, Gene Barry, Jack Gilford, Vicki Lawrence, Charles Siebert, Jesse White, Cindee Appleton.
105
106
25
26
"This Year's Model"Roger DuchownyRichard Albrecht and Casey KellerMay 2, 1981 (1981-05-02)
"The Model Marriage"Tony Webster
"Vogue Rogue"Barry Blitzer
"Too Clothes for Comfort"Richard Albrecht and Casey Keller
"Original Sin"Barry Blitzer

On a special cruise to Acapulco for a fashion festival, designers Geoffrey Beene, Halston, Bob Mackie, and Gloria Vanderbilt play themselves. A husband and wife who own a model agency spar over the use of one of the models who has captured the Captain's eye. A cosmetics king searching for a unique woman to represent his new product finds two competing candidates. Julie stands in for a model friend who has fallen in love. A couple searches for missing designer clothes while trying to keep their marriage secret from the woman's father.

Other guest stars: Robert Vaughn, Anne Baxter, Mike Connors, McLean Stevenson, Debra Clinger, Elke Sommer, Morgan Brittany, Jayne Kennedy, Cristina Ferrare, Dick Shawn, Bobby Short, Richard Gilliland, Camilla Sparv.
10727"Maid for Each Other"Howard MorrisTony WebsterMay 9, 1981 (1981-05-09)
"Lost and Found"Henry Colman
"Then There Were Two"Tony Webster

Gopher's aunt (Jane Powell), afraid to tell him she is no longer wealthy and has to work as a maid for another passenger (Mary Wickes), meets a charming passenger (Howard Keel). A playboy (Joe Namath) schemes against his best friend (Fred Willard) to claim a cash windfall. An abandoned infant needs an emergency blood transfusion.

Other guest stars: Gary Burghoff, Karen Grassle, Belinda J. Montgomery.
10828"Tony and Julie"Richard KinonBen Joelson and Art BaerMay 16, 1981 (1981-05-16)
"Separate Beds"Si Rose
"America's Sweetheart"Richard Albrecht and Casey Keller

Julie butts heads with a male passenger. A young actress comes on board and makes a fool of Vicki. An estranged husband and wife end up in the same cabin.

Guest stars: Anthony Andrews, Alison Arngrim, William Christopher, Nancy Kulp, Ronnie Schell, Toni Tennille, Lindsay Bloom.

Season 5 (1981–82)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
109
110
1
2
"The Expedition"Roger DuchownyBen Joelson & Art Baer and Jill Baer & Christopher VaneOctober 10, 1981 (1981-10-10)
"Julie's Wedding"Ben Joelson & Art Baer and Tony Webster
"The Mongala"Ben Joelson & Art Baer and Jill Baer & Christopher Vane
"Julie's Replacement"Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller and Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"The Three R's"Donald Ross
"The Professor's Wife"Ben Joelson & Art Baer and Jill Baer & Christopher Vane

Julie prepares to marry her fiancé during a stopover in Sydney, with Vicki as a bridesmaid, Capt. Stubing set to give her away and the guys as ushers; an anthropologist gives a golden opportunity to a disgraced former colleague but neglects his wife; a rancher holds a secret from a fellow passenger while catching the eye of a pretty girl; Gopher and Doc vie for the affections of the new cruise director. Isaac finds a problem with the crew's wedding gift for Julie; a love triangle pits two women against each other over an eligible rancher; the Mongala, an evolutionary missing link discovered by two anthropologists, is caged in the bowels of the ship; the crew tours the Australian animal preserve where Julie's fiancé works.

Guest stars: Anthony Andrews, Patrick Duffy, Michelle Phillips, Delvene Delaney, Donna Dixon, Elizabeth the Koala, José Ferrer, Harry Morgan, Gary Frank, Jenilee Harrison, Katherine Helmond, Tiny the Kangaroo, Queenie Ashton, Patrick Ward, Brendan Lunney.
1113"Two Grapes on the Vine" Bob Sweeney Jesse Dizon & Don HabermanOctober 17, 1981 (1981-10-17)
"Aunt Sylvia"Tony Webster
"Deductible Divorce"Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller

In the Virgin Islands, a wine-tasting competition is held, and Julie's aunt helps her friend scheme to snag the contest's wealthy sponsor; a judge starts a shipboard fling without getting to know his new partner well; a married couple who gets divorced every year for tax purposes takes the cruise; Vicki pines over a pro football player.

Note: This is a 90-minute episode.

Guest stars: Lee Bergere as Vince Van Durling, Carol Channing as Aunt Sylvia Duvall, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr. as Elliott Banning, Michael Goodwin as Kevin Butler, Robert Guillaume as Allan Curtis, Tanya Tucker as Annie Butler, Leslie Uggams as Marion Blake, Robert Walden as Jeff Thatcher, Betty White as Betsy Boucher, and Pat Haden as himself (Los Angeles Rams quarterback).
1124"The Incredible Hunk"Howard MorrisRay JesselOctober 24, 1981 (1981-10-24)
"Isaac, the Marriage Counselor"Tony Webster
"Jewels & Jim"Haskell Barkin

A teacher tries to hide his side job as a male stripper from a PTA member; Isaac's advice leads a husband astray, and his attempts to fix the problem only make matters worse; the captain suspects a known burglar in a theft of expensive jewels.

Guest stars: Henny Backus as Mrs. Landers, Jim Backus as Mr. Landers, Marla Gibbs as Janet Dalton, Brian Kerwin as Hank Austin, Christopher Norris as Shelley, Joan Van Ark as Lila Chandler, Flip Wilson as Frank Dalton, and Michael Zaslow as Jim Pickett.
1135"Country Blues"Don WeisR.S. Allen & Harvey BullockOctober 31, 1981 (1981-10-31)
"Daddy's Little Girl"Joan Brooker & Alexandra Stoddart
"Jackpot".S. Allen & Harvey Bullock

Gopher finds some money and fantasizes how he'll spend it; a folk singer meets an old friend who's now a politician and traveling with a female companion; a woman traveling with her father meets a veterinarian.

Guest Stars: Mason Adams as Richard Simmons, Frank Bonner as Dr. Jonathan Hunt, Florence Henderson as Annabelle Folker, Carol Lawrence as Barbara Gosford, James Noble as Martin "Blinky" Corell, and Randi Oakes as Marcy Crane.
1146"Chef's Special" Richard Kinon Henry ColmanNovember 7, 1981 (1981-11-07)
"Beginning Anew"Len Janson
"Kleinschmidt"R.S. Allen & Harvey Bullock

A new female cook lends a hand to the busy chef, who is not too happy with the arrangement; a bumbling German detective (Bernie Kopell) watches a lady's jewels; an embittered old sea dog meets a former girlfriend.

Guest Stars: Leslie Easterbrook as Edie Franklin, Jay Johnson as Chef Claude, Trisha Noble as Gertrude Turner, Richard Basehart as Stan Ellis, and Joan Fontaine as Jennifer Langley.
1157"The Lady from Laramie"Jack ArnoldFred S. Fox & Seaman JacobsNovember 14, 1981 (1981-11-14)
"Vicki Swings"Lou Patrick
"Phantom Bride"Paul Haggis & Michael Maurer

A male escort traveling with a companion meets a widow from Wyoming; a married couple checks into the honeymoon suite to find the "Phantom Bride"; Vicki pretends to be older to attract an 18-year-old boy away from another girl.

Guest Stars: Cesare Danova as Fedalio Cevini, Nancy Dussault as Libby Crawford, Buddy Hackett as Julian Garfield, Patrick Labyorteaux as Todd Andrews, Irlene Mandrell as Andrea, Juliet Mills as Kate Garfield, and Marti Stevens as Miss Singleton.
116
117
8
9
"Farnsworth's Fling"Richard KinonFred S. Fox & Seaman JacobsNovember 21, 1981 (1981-11-21)
"Three in a Bed"Fred S. Fox & Seaman Jacobs
"I Remember Helen"Fred S. Fox & Seaman Jacobs
"Merrill, Melanie & Melanesia"Ray Jessel
"Gopher Farnsworth Smith"Ben Joelson & Art Baer

A dying tycoon (Lloyd Bridges) charters the ship to re-evaluate his relatives.

The crew is in Australia to work on one of the cruise line's ships based there. A wealthy man named William Farnsworth (Lloyd Bridges) has decided to invite his whole family for a reunion. However, he wants to see who among them he should keep in his will. Among them is his niece, Marcia (Jessica Walter), who is not exactly fond of him, because she believes that because of him her father became penniless. She brings along a friend, Jessica (Linda Evans), who has a knack for getting wealthy men to marry her to get him to marry her so that she could get what Marcia thinks she deserves. He asks his niece, Jenny (Morgan Fairchild) and her husband Bud (Grant Goodeve), to come but they are divorced so they have to pretend that they are still married. After her fiancé (Alan Fletcher) calls, he comes aboard and refuses to leave and when he is told there are no more cabins, he stays with them. Farnsworth's secretary and niece, Eloise (Beth Howland) gets him a replacement valet, Wayne (Jim Nabors) who's not exactly what he is used to. Wayne and Eloise get close. Gopher thinks he might be related to Farnsworth and could be entitled to his fortune. Stubing meets an old flame's daughter, Melanie (Margaret Laurence) and when he has to go, she decides to join him and he keeps his distance because he cannot seem to separate her from her late mother. Julie cannot help but think about Tony Selkirk (Anthony Andrews), the guy she nearly married but he chose not to get married because he was dying.

Guest Stars: Lloyd Bridges as William Otis Farnsworth, Jessica Walter as Marcia Farnsworth-Smith, Linda Evans as Jessica Halberson, Morgan Fairchild as Jenny Boyer, Grant Goodeve as Bud Boyer, Anthony Andrews as Tony Selkirk (archive footage), Beth Howland as Eloise Farnsworth, Jim Nabors as Wayne Bouton (the Valet), Elizabeth the Koala as herself, Graham Kennedy as Port Vila Jeweller, Margaret Laurence as Melanie Kalani, Madeline Kalani (flashback), Patti MacLeod as Hazel Farnsworth, and Ethel Merman as Roz Smith (Gopher's mother).

Other Guests: Alan Fletcher as Martin Blake, Brendan Lunney as David Selkirk, and Russell Newman as Frank Farnsworth.
11810"Radioactive Isaac" Robert Scheerer Everett Greenbaum and Elliott ReidNovember 28, 1981 (1981-11-28)
"Gladys and Agnes"Sid Morse
"Love, Honor, and Obey"Arnold Kane

After 20 years of marriage, a couple of bickers over renewing wedding vows; a reluctant old maid is tricked into romance by her sister; Isaac's dental work has strange side effects.

Guest stars: Bernard Fox as Henry Whitewood, Darrow Igus as Brandon Ames, Audra Lindley as Agnes Larrabee, Anne Meara as Rose Vitelli, Marion Ross as Gladys Johnson, Jerry Stiller as Tony Vitelli, Berlinda Tolbert as Patty Phelps, Fred Holliday as Father Brendan Riley.
11911"He's My Brother"Bruce BilsonTony WebsterDecember 5, 1981 (1981-12-05)
"Zeke and Zelda"Christopher Vane & Jill Baer
"Teach Me Tonight"Jerry Winnick

A man seeks revenge on his brother, "Dr. Adam Bricker"; an elderly couple evicted from their home tries to scam a free cruise; a plain woman meets the suave author of the trashy romance novel she is reading (called Passion at Dawn).

Guest stars: Daryl Anderson as Michael Scott, Jack Bannon as Fred Bricker, Milton Berle as Zeke "Van Buren," Elinor Donahue as Mrs. Van Buren, Herb Edelman as Howard Van Buren, Elaine Joyce as Nancy Bricker, Martha Raye as Zelda "Van Buren", Susan Richardson as Emily Parker.
12012"Take a Letter, Vicki"Richard KinonRoy BattocchioDecember 12, 1981 (1981-12-12)
"The Floating Bridge Game"Marlene Perry & Mel Shields
"The Joy of Celibacy"Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein

Vicki's overzealous approach to her new duties annoys the crew; a group of bridge players schemes to get a former member back; a casanova plays hard-to-get-to-defrost a frigid female.

Guest stars: Robert Alda as Dr. Frank Leonhardt, Lucille Benson as Doris, Jan Clayton as Ethel, Nanette Fabray as Shirley Simpson, Rose Marie as fourth bridge player, Jim Stafford as Barry Styles, and Carlene Watkins as Linda Trent.
12113"Doc Takes the Fifth"Bruce BilsonTony Webster and Jill Baer & Christopher VaneJanuary 2, 1982 (1982-01-02)
"Safety Last"Joel S. Hecht & Joseph Neustein
"A Business Affair"Haskell Barkin

Doc weds a concert cellist but finds she didn't marry him for love; an overly cautious safety inspector learns it may be too risky to play it safe; a high-strung executive falls for his female vice president.

Guest stars: Don Adams as Sidney Williams, Britt Ekland as Alice Robbins, Irena Ferris as Tania Bricker, Robert Fuller as Ralph Kirby, Judy Norton-Taylor as Lydia Foster, and Kai Wulff as Mikhail.
12214"Good Neighbors" Jerome Courtland Tony WebsterJanuary 9, 1982 (1982-01-09)
"Captain's Portrait"Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein
"Familiar Faces"John Whelpley

A persistent passenger tries to win over a reluctant neighbor; the captain frets over the painting of his portrait; an aspiring lawyer fears being recognized by a figure from his wild days.

Guest stars: Dean Butler, Arlene Golonka, Henry Jones, Mary Elizabeth McDonough, Lee Meriwether, Sonny Shroyer.
12315"I Don't Play Anymore"Bob SweeneyLan O'KunJanuary 23, 1982 (1982-01-23)
"Gopher's Roommate"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
"Crazy for You"Christopher Vane & Jill Baer

A famed pianist fights through pain to finance a maid's operation; Gopher must deal with an old buddy who is now a woman; a psychologist suspects a claimant of faking his quirky disability.

Guest stars: Joanna Cassidy, James MacArthur, Pat McCormick, Donna Pescow, Mackenzie Phillips, Dick Shawn.
12416"Green, But Not Jolly"Richard KinonTony WebsterJanuary 30, 1982 (1982-01-30)
"Past Perfect Love"Haskell Barkin
"Instant Family"Donald Ross

Julie's hair turns green; two people are brought together by visions of reincarnation; a single mother's devotion to her special-needs son threatens a budding romance.

Guest stars: Bert Convy, Lynda Day George, John Phillip Law, Tanya Roberts, Corey Feldman.
12517"The Return of the Captain's Lady"Howard MorrisSid MorseFebruary 6, 1982 (1982-02-06)
"Love Ain't Illegal"Jack and Carole Mendelsohn
"The Irresistible Man"R.S. Allen & Harvey Bullock

The captain commemorates his tenth year with the cruise line and proposes to an old flame; business associates double-cross each other in various ways; the appeal of a rebuked suitor soars when scintillating rumors circulate.

Guest stars: Linwood Boomer, Lydia Cornell, Pat Crowley, Phyllis Davis, Patricia Klous, Robert Mandan, Dick Martin.
12618"His Girls Friday"Robert ScheererMarlene Perry & Mel ShieldsFebruary 13, 1982 (1982-02-13)
"A Wife for Wilfred"Fred S. Fox & Seaman Jacobs
"The Girl Who Stood Still"Rick Lenz

A businessman takes his prudish secretary on a business trip, then he meets an attractive blonde and has difficulty firing the former to hire the latter; another man offers the crew $10,000 if they can find him a pretty wife and several women vie for his attention, while the crew tries to win the money; a mother tries to reunite her teenage daughter with a childhood sweetheart, only the girl is self-conscious about developing scoliosis.

Guest stars: Judy Landers, Rue McClanahan, Vera Miles, Denise Miller, Jimmy Osmond, Tom Smothers, Connie Stevens, Dick Van Patten.
12719"Live It Up"Richard KinonHoward Albrecht and Sol WeinsteinFebruary 20, 1982 (1982-02-20)
"New York A.C."Mike Marmer
"All's Affair in Love and War"Lan O'Kun

Three divorced men try to prevent each other from marrying, but one of them rekindles a romance with his ex-wife; a woman pleads with her lover to leave his wife; Captain Stubing experiences dizzy spells.

Guest stars: Edd Byrnes, Ron Ely, Fabian, Annette Funicello, Jill St. John, Bobby Sherman.
128
129
20
21
"The Musical"Roger DuchownyRay JesselFebruary 27, 1982 (1982-02-27)
"My Aunt, the Worrier"Tony Webster
"The Show Must Go On"Ray Jessel
"The Pest"Ben Joelson and Art Baer
"My Ex-Mom"Ray Jessel

The crew and guests stage musical numbers.

Guest stars: Cab Calloway, Carol Channing, Van Johnson, Ethel Merman, Ann Miller, Della Reese.
130
131
22
23
"Klondike Carnival"Roger DuchownyFred Grandy and Jan Gough GrandyMarch 6, 1982 (1982-03-06)
"The Viking's Son"Fred Grandy and Jan Gough Grandy
"Separate Vacations"Fred Grandy and Jan Gough Grandy
"The Experiment"Fred Grandy and Jan Gough Grandy
"Getting to Know You"Harvey Bullock

The Pacific Princess competes with another ship while cruising to Alaska; Captain Stubing enters a dog-sled race against the other ship's captain, who is angry that his son is working for Stubing; a man and woman spend the entire cruise in their cabin to get acquainted; a newly separated couple find they cannot handle being apart; a scientist obsesses over his love potion and neglects his girlfriend.

Guest stars: Priscilla Barnes as Swedish masseuse/trainer Brittany Sorenson, Douglas Barr as Dave Pursinger, Sonny Bono as Steve Bloom, Tom Bosley as Harry Meacham, Woody Brown as Trig Norquist, Mary Crosby as Megan Lewis, John James as Dr. Skip van Damme, Ted Knight as Captain Gunner Norquist, Michele Lee as Dorothy Meacham, Charlotte Rae as Ellen van Bowe, and Charles Nelson Reilly as Jesse Dobson.

"Klondike Carnival" is also known sometimes as "Pride of the Pacific". This episode was dedicated to the memory of R.S. "Ray" Allen, who passed away during Season 5, on October 17, 1981.
13224"Isaac Gets Physical"Bob SweeneyRichard Albrecht and Casey KellerMarch 20, 1982 (1982-03-20)
"She Brought Her Mother Along"Fred S. Fox and Seaman Jacobs
"Cold Feet"Ray Jessel and Cynthia Thompson

Isaac avoids a physical exam to hide a congenital condition that could jeopardize his job, while the nurse develops a crush on him; a young woman's older boyfriend turns out to be her mother's former lover; Julie's cousin wants to dump his fiancée.

Guest stars: Shirley Hemphill, Connie Needham, Gene Barry, Betsy Palmer, Richard Dean Anderson, Linda Blair.
13325"Burl of My Dreams"Richard KinonJill Baer and Christopher VaneMarch 27, 1982 (1982-03-27)
"Meet the Author"Mike Marmer
"Rhymes, Riddles, and Romance"Ray Jessel and Cynthia Thompson

Vicki is infatuated with Gopher; a publisher falls for an author's niece; two try to cheat each other in a treasure hunt.

Guest stars: Georgia Engel, Alan Hale, Jared Martin, Joanna Pettet, Paul Williams.
13426"Does Father Know Best?"Ted LangeJulie Fleischer and Jeffrey DavisApril 10, 1982 (1982-04-10)
"Pal-I-Mony-O-Mine"Donald Ross
"An 'A' for Gopher"An 'A' for Gopher

A companion befriends a doctor's ex-girlfriend; Gopher falls for a former teacher; a father learns a lesson.

Guest stars: Lloyd Bochner, Kevin Brophy, Lynne Moody, Denise Nicholas-Hill, Susan Strasberg, Ben Vereen, Kristina Wayborn.
13527"April in Boston"Richard KinonBen Joelson and Art BaerMay 1, 1982 (1982-05-01)
"Breaks of Life"Mike Marmer
"Saving Grace"Christopher Vane and Jill Baer

April Lopez (Charo) is back again, this time as a Spanish tutor to Bradford York (David Hedison), the proper headmaster of a New England boys' boarding school. Brad was widowed four years earlier and wouldn't approve of her chanteuse habits, which may go on display when the planned entertainer cancels and Stubing presses Julie to find a replacement. Lonely widow Grace Bostwick plans to throw herself overboard, but a white-suited man named Gabriel claims to be her guardian angel and may be able to stop her. After ten years of marriage, newly divorced George and Gwen Finley are vacationing together on the same cruise. But their enjoyment is cut short when both of them suffer injuries and wind up in the infirmary together.

Guest stars: Jayne Meadows, Charo, David Hedison, Hugh O'Brian, Jane Powell, Gene Rayburn, Max Showalter.
13628"A Dress to Remember"Robert ScheererHoward Albrecht and Sol WeinsteinMay 8, 1982 (1982-05-08)

An expensive dress involved in each of this episode's storylines. A model sponsored by a diet doctor is the target of the doctor's rival; the captain helps a poor flower merchant reconnect with her long-lost daughter; a man dresses as a woman to avoid his murderous former father-in-law; Gopher and Isaac fret over the care of the dress, afraid their jobs may be at stake.

Guest stars: Markie Post, Kelly Monteith, Lyle Waggoner, Eleanor Parker, Catherine Parks, Bob Denver, Brianne Leary, Forrest Tucker.
13729"Mothers Don't Do That"Jerome CourtlandRichard Albrecht and Casey KellerMay 15, 1982 (1982-05-15)
"Substitute Lover"Fredi Towbin
"Marrying for Money"Cynthia Thompson and Ray Jessel

A woman's attempt to reconnect with her estranged son goes wrong when he finds what she wrote in her diary; the crew thinks a woman is trying to murder her millionaire husband; an old friend of Julie's pretends to be a woman's pen pal to get close to her.

Guest stars: Eva Gabor, Arte Johnson, Caren Kaye. Audrey Landers, Eddie Mekka.

Season 6 (1982–83)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
138
139
1
2
"Venetian Love Song" Richard Kinon Mike MarmerOctober 2, 1982 (1982-10-02)
"Down for the Count"Tony Webster
"Arrividerci, Gopher"Sid Morse
"The Arrangement"Mike Marmer

The crew goes to Italy: The ship cruises to Rome, Capri, and Venice. Teresa and Dominic decide to separate. Maria discovers her lover is an aristocrat.

  • Dominic (Ernest Borgnine) and Teresa (Shelley Winters), originally from Italy, are bickering to the point of possible separation.
  • Their daughters Carmen (Candice Azzara) and Francesca (Meredith Baxter) are also aboard. Francesca meets a man (David Birney), unaware he's a gigolo.
  • Granddaughter Maria (Marie Osmond), who's been promised to another guy back home, meets a local (John James) and is attracted to him.
  • Gopher meets a local woman (Christopher Norris) who says he reminds her of someone she knows. While on shore, the man, who's the spitting image of Gopher, kidnaps him and assumes his identity.

Guest stars: Rossano Brazzi

1403"The Anniversary Gift" Ted Lange Jerry WinnickOctober 16, 1982 (1982-10-16)
"Honey Bee Mine"Buddy Atkinson
"Bewigged, Bothered and Bewildered"Harvey Bullock
A couple celebrating their 20th anniversary (Robert Mandan and Lynn Redgrave) find that even with grown children, she still wants another baby. Julie tries to keep her ex-roommate (Randi Oakes) who has a history of hitting on her boyfriends from hitting on her current beau (Richard Bergman) so she tells her that Gopher is her latest. Gopher goes along even though he is in love with someone else. The Captain's high school classmate (Phyllis Diller) is on board but he is self-conscious about his baldness so he wears a toupee when she is around.
1414"The Same Wavelength" Robert Scheerer Lan O'KunOctober 23, 1982 (1982-10-23)
"Winning Isn't Everything"Joan Brooker & Alexandra Stoddart
"A Honeymoon for Horace"Buddy Atkinson
A psychic (Connie Stevens) comes on board to entertain the passengers and she meets a man (Charles Siebert) who's unsure if he wants to remain with the wife from whom he is currently separated. A friend of Stubing's (David Doyle) comes on board with his son (Matthew Labyorteaux) whom he doesn't see much of. Father can't help but boast of his son's accomplishments, but the son later reveals to Vicki that his accomplishments are not true. And an elderly couple who are engaged (Jack Gilford and Nancy Walker) come on board and the guy is nervous about taking the plunge.
1425"Command Performance" Jerome Courtland Roy BattocchioOctober 30, 1982 (1982-10-30)
"Hyde and Seek"Ted Lange & Jean Ford
"Sketchy Love"Lloyd Turner & Howard Liebling

A young girl (Kim Richards) who is infatuated with Gopher pretends to be her older sister. An artist (Morgan Brittany) meets an unhappily married guy (Skip Stephenson). And the ship's comic (Dan Rowan) runs into the wife (Marion Ross) and daughter (Eve Plumb) he left years ago.

Guest stars: Dana Andrews, Janet Blair
1436"The Groupies"Don WeisMike MarmerNovember 6, 1982 (1982-11-06)
"The Audition"Sid Morse
"Doc's Nephew"Jesse Dizon & Don Haberman

A psychiatrist (Richard Deacon) who specializes in group therapy goes on board for a little vacation but one of his groups joins him. And they still want him to help them. And when two of them (Elaine Joyce and Jerry Van Dyke) get attracted to each other, they don't know what to do. An actor (Tristan Rogers) runs into the writer of a soap (Susan Lucci) who rejected him. She wonders if he has something up his sleeve. Doc's girlfriend (Michelle Phillips) joins him, as does his nephew (Willie Aames). The young man makes a move on her, prompting Doc to challenge him.

Guest stars: Morey Amsterdam, Rose Marie

Note: Morey Amsterdam and Rose Marie appeared on The Dick Van Dyke Show from 1961 to 1966.
144
145
7
8
"The Spoonmaker Diamond"Robert ScheererMike MarmerNovember 13, 1982 (1982-11-13)
"Papa Doc"Mike Marmer
"The Role Model"Catherine Bacos
"Julie's Tycoon"Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller

The crew sails on the Stella Solaris to Greece and Turkey:

  • The priceless Spoonmaker Diamond is stolen from the Topkapi Museum.
  • Travel agent Dana Pierce (Polly Bergen) wants to check out the locales for business purposes.
  • Emmett and Ella Stokes (Harvey Korman and Nancy Dussault) insist they have seen fellow passenger Mark Hayward (Mike Connors) before, but he repeatedly denies it.
  • Crusading reporter Joe Novak (Kiel Martin) is quietly dating Sabrina Drake (Jan Smithers), whose mother Amanda Drake (Alexis Smith) he libeled in his columns. When Doc finds out that Sabrina is pregnant, he gives serious consideration to marrying her and being the unborn child's surrogate father.
  • Photographer Cliff Jacobs (David Hedison) runs into his ex-wife Monica Brandon (Linda Evans) on board and wants her to model for him, but she won't do it until he has a definite assignment.
  • Years ago, Julie sponsored a Greek male child named Gregori Papanopolis (Lorenzo Lamas) through a world relief organization. Now that she's visiting Greece, she looks him up and finds that he is a wealthy businessman. They spend time getting reacquainted.
  • Inspector Akmed Sadu (Jamie Farr) of Interpol boards the ship and demands that Captain Stubing detain several passengers, including Hayward, whom Sadu seems to know.
  • Cliff and Monica renew their romance. Meanwhile, Cliff wants Vicki to model for him on an ongoing basis, which could start a career for her.
  • Dana shows Mark the diamond that she bought at the bazaar, but Emmett and Ella Stokes see her. One passenger has a narrow escape from a car crash.
  • Sabrina contemplates Doc's marriage proposal, and he tells her that she's pregnant. Doc pinch-hits for Merrill in showing Amanda around the Istanbul Museum but is interrupted by Joe Novak, who demands to speak to her, alone.
  • Gregori proposes marriage to Julie.
  • Emmett Stokes and Mark Hayward's real association is revealed and the Spoonmaker Diamond changes hands.

Guest stars: Craig Stevens

1469"Thanksgiving Cruise: Too Many Dads"Richard KinonRay Jessel & Cynthia ThompsonNovember 20, 1982 (1982-11-20)
"Love Will Find a Way"Ann Gibbs & Joel Kimmel
"The Best of Friends"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
It is Thanksgiving, and among the passengers is a woman (Wendy Schaal) who wants to introduce her fiancé (Jim Knaub) to her parents (Lorne Greene and Dorothy McGuire) but she neglected to tell them that he is a paraplegic. A father (Richard Hatch) and his son (Christian Jacobs) are trying to get away from the boy's natural father (Michael Lembeck) who wants to take him away. And the crew is bickering with each other to the point that they're not speaking with each other.
14710"The Man in the Iron Shorts"Jerome CourtlandStory by: Arnold Kane
Teleplay by: Harvey Bullock
November 27, 1982 (1982-11-27)
"The Victims"Sid Morse
"Heavens to Betsy"Harvey Bullock
Gopher returns from vacation with a new girlfriend Gail Cowler (Taylor Miller), who is a history teacher. He also has a trunk carrying a suit of armor, which he dons to impress her. But when Isaac tries to help him get out of the suit, he breaks the bolt and traps Gopher inside. Captain Stubing's longtime friend Joan Heinsley (Ruth Warrick) was widowed in a drunk driving crash, years earlier. The pain of losing her husband never completely healed and now intensifies as her daughter Vanessa (Denise Miller) falls for Webb Jones Junior (Laurence Lau), the son of the drunk driver who took Joan's husband's life. Reverend David Ruland (Robert Pine) leads a mission study society on board the cruise, but two of his members, Betsy Dunbar (Janine Turner) and Laura Tenley (Sharon Gabet) are smitten with him.
14811"The Tomorrow Lady"Richard A. WellsStory by: Roy Kammerman
Teleplay by: Harvey Bullock
December 4, 1982 (1982-12-04)
"Father, Dear Father"Larry Markes & Sidney Reznick
"Still Life"Harvey Bullock
Glen Leciter (Howard Duff) meets Alice Bailey (Greer Garson), a woman who, by her admission, is a "good guesser." He plans to use her clairvoyant gift to win big in the stock market. Sarah Curtis (Kim Darby) wants to get to know bachelor Ken Miller (Lawrence Pressman) better because she thinks he's a single parent. Ken borrows his friend Tom MacDonald's (Jim Stafford) daughter Libby (Louanne), who is a budding actress, to act the part of his daughter and impress Sarah. When Isaac experiences hearing loss, Doc diagnoses the problem as a temporary middle ear infection in both ears. But, Isaac fears that the hearing loss may be permanent.
14912"Baby Talk"Robert ScheererHaskell BarkinDecember 11, 1982 (1982-12-11)
"My Friend, the Executrix"Tony Webster
"Programmed for Love"Donald Ross
Connie Pierce (Donna Pescow) feels left out when her husband Steve (Grant Goodeve) takes a liking to Jan Willis (Angela Cartwright), who is to be their baby's surrogate mother. Julie's recently widowed Aunt Sylvia (Carol Channing) visits with her friend Betsy Boucher (Betty White), who has been named the executrix of the estate and obsessively nags Sylvia to conserve money. Ruth Gaylor (Karen Morrow) falls for inventor Franklin Trumbauer (Peter Marshall), who doesn't notice her because he's too busy attending to his ever-present creation: a robot named Bix.
15013"The Christmas Presence"Richard KinonDavid & Michele SwiftDecember 18, 1982 (1982-12-18)
On a Christmas cruise, a senior citizen named Angelarum Dominicus (Mickey Rooney) is present in the lives of several other passengers. The crew members argue over how to decorate the ship for the holidays while Captain Stubing grows impatient. Jim and Lori Markham (Donny Osmond and Maureen McCormick) are taking their first vacation in years, with him being frustrated by her workaholic tendencies that keep them apart. Sisters Regina and Bernadette (Teresa Wright and Jan Rooney) chaperone the members of the Good Shepherd Boys' Choir en route to their home in Acapulco. The nuns don't know they're carrying gold stolen by Charlie Dobbs (Keenan Wynn) and Henry Beemus (Henry Gibson) to its final destination.
15114"Paroled to Love"Robert ScheererTony WebsterJanuary 8, 1983 (1983-01-08)
"First Impressions"Jan Gough Grandy
"Love Finds Florence Nightingale"Ben Joelson & Art Baer
This cruise is supposed to have some celebrities among the passengers. But the PR employees (Debbie Reynolds and Marilyn Michaels) booked them on a different cruise. So they end up impersonating celebrities. A celebrity (Carole Cook), doing research for her role as Florence Nightingale by working as Doc's nurse, meets a passenger (Forrest Tucker) who doesn't like show business types. A man (Richard Kline) who was accused of a crime but acquitted, goes on the cruise with the lawyer (Vicki Lawrence) who defended him. Making admissions to each other, she reveals she loves him and he reveals he committed the crime he was charged with.
15215"The Captain's Replacement"Bob SweeneyTony WebsterJanuary 15, 1983 (1983-01-15)
"Sly as a Fox"Buddy Atkinson
"Here Comes the Bride – Maybe"F. Michael Johnson
Capt. Stubing mentors Captain Donahue (McLean Stevenson), whom Gopher thinks is out to take command of the Pacific Princess. Ben Phillips (Frank Bonner) and Henry Greg (Arte Johnson) seem to be aggressively competing for the affection of Mary Frances Bellflower (Shelley Fabares), who claims that they're only after her foxhound. Doc's longtime friend Erica Dupont (Jenilee Harrison) works on the cruise to help her mother pay for her wedding to wealthy fiancé Robert Wallingford (Stephen Shortridge), who, along with his socially snobbish parents Harold and Margaret (William Windom) and (Jane Wyatt), thinks she's wealthy as well. But then Harold and Margaret turn up on the same cruise, leading Erica to try to hide from them.
15316"Doc's Big Case"Bob SweeneyBarry BlitzerJanuary 22, 1983 (1983-01-22)
"Senior Sinners"Harvey Bullock
"A Booming Romance"Roy Kammerman

Doc's medical school chum, Dr. Elliot Norton (James Noble), gives Vicki some information for an article on Doc. Norton's soon besieged with requests for interviews, leaving Doc feeling very insecure about his accomplishments, which pale in comparison. Tom Niver (Raymond St. Jacques) and Faye Phillips (Theresa Merritt) are seniors living together without being married. They introduce his son Jeffrey (Brian Stokes Mitchell) to her daughter Velma (Telma Hopkins), both of whom object to their parents' domestic arrangement. Computer genius Ross (Alan Young) meets longtime friend Kathy Brighton (Holland Taylor) aboard the ship, but is afraid of losing her to masculine passenger Bob Williams (Adam West). While taking Kathy on a tour of the ship, Ross finds something startling in the cargo hold.

Guest star: Tori Spelling
15417"Gopher's Daisy"Richard KinonMark MarmerJanuary 29, 1983 (1983-01-29)
"Our Son, the Lawyer"Jerry Winnick
"Salvaged Romance"Kevin Hartigan
Gopher buys a Daisy exercise machine to improve his physique but doesn't want the other crew members to know about it. Meanwhile, an attractive girl (Chanelle Lea) keeps sneaking into his cabin while he's out. Doc, Isaac, and Julie are confused by the sounds of his exercising and by the girl's comings and goings. They eventually jump to the wrong conclusion that he's having a very physical affair with the girl. Long-married Lou and Harriet Stevens (James Coco and Doris Roberts) bicker a great deal. Their 25-year-old son Jonathan (Adam Arkin) is a divorce lawyer who announces plans to move out of the family homestead and into a bachelor pad, leaving Harriet traumatized. She reacts so emotionally that it leads her and Lou to contemplate divorce, and both of them want Jonathan to represent them. Society matron Allison Newman (Joan Rivers)'s romance with junk dealer Max Glutovsky (Alex Rocco) is threatened due to the lingering insecurity she feels from her first husband divorcing her after she underwent a successful mastectomy.
155
156
18
19
"Isaac's Aegean Affair"Alan RafkinChristopher Vane & Jill BaerFebruary 5, 1983 (1983-02-05)
"The Captain and the Kid"Fred S. Fox & Seaman Jacobs
"Poor Rich Man"Fred S. Fox & Seaman Jacobs
"The Dean and the Flunkee"Fred S. Fox & Seaman Jacobs

The crew is in Greece working a cruise a college is having its graduation ceremony aboard:

  • Dean Burton (Eddie Albert) is attracted to a teacher Priscilla (Shirley Jones) who rebuffs him because he won't give a student a make-up test so he can graduate. Making matters worse, the student and a couple of his friends are hounding the principal about the makeup test.
  • A prodigy Charles (Jimmy McNichol) is attracted to Vicki, which doesn't make the Captain happy.
  • The valedictorian (Parker Stevenson), whose education was provided by his Greek aunt (Eva Marie Saint) whom he assumed is wealthy, learns she's just a woman of humble means. When she arrives on board, he does not tell anyone who she is, not even his girlfriend (Lisa Whelchel).
  • Isaac meets a woman who is estranged from her husband (Debbie Allen). Vicki falls in love, while a beloved crew member decides to leave the ship.

Guest stars: Leigh McCloskey, William R. Moses

15720"The Zinging Valentine"Richard KinonBen Joelson & Art BaerFebruary 12, 1983 (1983-02-12)
"The Very Temporary Secretary"Joseph A. Goodson
"Final Score"Lan O'Kun
A woman who delivers singing telegrams (Claudia Lonow) ends up stuck aboard after delivering a "Dear John" message to a passenger (Donny Most). A temp agency owner (Don Adams) takes the place of the secretary scheduled to sail with a magazine editor (Fannie Flagg). An NFL quarterback (John Amos)'s attempt to get close to an English professor (Jayne Kennedy) keeps getting penalty flags.
15821"The Captain's Crush"Ted LangeBen Joelson & Art BaerFebruary 19, 1983 (1983-02-19)
"Out of My Hair"Haskell Barkin
"Off-Course Romance"Jill Baer & Christopher Vane
Movie star Janine Adams (Joan Collins), who has been divorced from nine husbands, boards the Princess for a cruise without knowing that a tabloid reporter is in tow to write a story about her love life. When Capt. Stubing develops feelings for her, speculation arises that he could become her tenth husband. Lydia Harris (Delta Burke) plans to marry her wealthy fiancé Lawrence Jurgens (Jeffrey Tambor) in Acapulco, but her ex-lover/ex-hairdresser Ron (Richard Gilliland) is on the same cruise and is determined to win her back. Frustrated golf widow Kathy Costello (Stella Stevens) takes the cruise alone, while her husband Joe (Monte Markham) plays in a tournament. Kathy is reunited with her former lover Ted Cole (Ron Ely) after a separation of ten years.
15922"Abby's Maiden Voyage"Jerome CourtlandBarbara AllynFebruary 26, 1983 (1983-02-26)
"He Ain't Heavy"Ted Lange & Jean Ford
"I Like to Be in America"Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller

After being let go by her employer, April Lopez (Charo) plans to move back home to Mexico. She wants to become an American citizen but always gets nervous and crumbles during the oral exam. A passenger, Judge Kramer (Esther Rolle), is summoned to help her take the citizenship test. George and Phyllis Cowens (Don Porter and Barbara Billingsley) treat their adopted son Jimmy (Michael J. Fox) to a cruise as a high school graduation gift. Jimmy mistreats Gregory Steven Leonard (Gregg Henry), one of the ship's waiters. Animosity develops quickly between the two, who soon learn that they have a connection. Inexperienced young Abby Foster (Mary Beth McDonough) wants to have her first time with a man and meets handsome fellow passenger Neil Holmes (Brodie Greer). But whenever they become intimate, she breaks up laughing and kills the mood.

Guest stars: Constance Forslund
16023"Vicki's Dilemma"Jack ArnoldHenry ColemanMarch 5, 1983 (1983-03-05)
"Discount Romance"Roy Battocchio
"Loser and Still Champ"Lan O'Kun
Vicki hooks up with a young passenger Mark (Glenn Scarpelli) who gives her some pills he claims are supplements. After the boy gets ill, Doc deduces it's from drug use. When the pills are found on Vicki, the boy's mother Andrea (Elinor Donahue) accuses Vicki of giving her son the drugs. Gopher's uncle Jimmy (Red Buttons), a salesman, sets up a little shop in his cabin which undermines the ship's gift shop. He takes a liking to the woman Shirley (June Allyson) in charge of the gift shop, whose job could be in jeopardy because she's not making any sales. A guy Tom (Patrick Wayne) traveling with his girlfriend Stacy (Ann Turkel) feels emasculated because she's better at the things he likes to do.
16124"So Help Me Hannah"Kim FriedmanMike MarmerMarch 12, 1983 (1983-03-12)
"The Maid Cleans Up"Daryl Busby & Gerry Kroll
"C.P.R., I.O.U."Hudson Hickman & Alexander Marrant
A woman (Mary Martin)'s ability to dispense advice irritates the Captain as well as the father Jarvis (Max Showalter) of a young man who wants to pursue his path Kent (Timothy Patrick Murphy). A maid Dee Dee (Judy Landers) goes on the cruise to win the heart of her employer Gregory (Ben Murphy). Will the budding relationship be doomed by his girlfriend Meredith (Caren Kaye)? Gopher's CPR course comes in handy after a retired passenger (Milton Berle), who feels his son Dwaine (Steven Keats) isn't working hard enough at the family plumbing business, has a heart attack.
16225"Going to the Dogs"Bob SweeneyBen Joelson & Art BaerMarch 26, 1983 (1983-03-26)
"Putting on the Dog"Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller
"Women's Best Friend"Tony Webster
"Whose Dog Is It Anyway"Christopher Vane & Jill Baer

A contest is held on board to determine which dog will be on the cover of dog food containers:

  • A woman (Catherine Bach) thinks a dog belonging to another passenger (Dirk Benedict) is one she lost some time ago.
  • Isaac's Aunt Tanya (Isabel Sanford) enters her pet and is pampering him so much, her husband Charles (Mel Stewart) feels neglected.
  • Gopher and Isaac get a dog (Tundra the Wonder Dog), enter him in the contest, seem to have trouble training him, and sell him to Vicki.
  • A mail clerk from the dog food company (Ray Buktenica) poses as the company president Jack (Gordon Jump), who's really in Las Vegas with another woman. Things get complicated when the clerk connects with a passenger Wendy (Heather Thomas) and has a surprise visit from his "wife" (Jo Anne Worley).

Guest stars: Chuck McCann, Moore's Mongrel Revue

Notes: This is a 90-minute episode.

16326"The Professor Has Class"Richard KinonTony WebsterApril 2, 1983 (1983-04-02)
"When the Magic Disappears"Dan Kallis
"We, the Jury"Mike Marmer

Professor Roscoe Weber (Sam Jaffe), a 91-year-old Nobel Prize winner for psychology, doesn't realize that his adoring former pupil, Professor Helen Burton (Bettye Ackerman), has been hired by his university to replace him. Expert magician The Great Stellini (Dick Van Patten) disapproves of his daughter Christina (Mary-Margaret Humes)'s suitor, novice magician Joey Gardiner (Barry Van Dyke), who he thinks wants to steal his secrets. Minnie Dunlop (Anne Meara) used to be Harlan Weatherly (Jerry Stiller)'s landlady before his damage to the apartment drove her to file a lawsuit against him. The crew holds a simulated small claims court for Minnie and Harlan.

Note: Both Sam Jaffe & Bettye Ackerman and Anne Meara & Jerry Stiller were married in real life.
164
165
27
28
"Country Music Jamboree: Hits and Missus"Richard KinonUnknownApril 30, 1983 (1983-04-30)
"Return of Annabelle"
"Just Plain Folks Medicine"
"Caught in the Act"
"The Real Thing"
"Do Not Disturb"
"Lulu and Kenny"

Aboard a country music jamboree cruise:

  • Gopher thwarts an incognito Dottie West's plans for a restful weekend. He also borrows kitchen implements without asking from Chef Loomis (Pat Buttram) so the crew can create an opening act for the jamboree.
  • Singer Holly Hartman (Jessica Walter) discovers her husband Danny (Mel Tillis) is writing songs under a pseudonym for chart-topping singer C.G. Thomas (Tanya Tucker).
  • Annabelle Folker (Florence Henderson) returns with a golfer boyfriend Ted Myler (Bert Convy) and three orphans (Neil Billingsley, Angela Lee Sloan, and Michael Evans) whose parents died en route to one of her concerts. The orphans try to upset Ted, so he'll bow out and enable Annabelle to spend more time with them.
  • Effie Skaggs (Minnie Pearl) upsets Doc and Capt. Stubing by handing out bottles of her homemade folk remedy "Aunt Effie's Elixir," thus practicing medicine without a license.
  • Jeannie Davis's (Beth Howland)' jewelry attracts the attention of outspoken jeweler Henry Bullard (Sherman Hemsley), who knows that it's real. Jeannie is desperate to keep this news from her husband, Bill (Steve Kanaly) because revealing the secret could jeopardize their marriage.
  • Plus-sized Kenny Creek (Kenny Price) and Lulu Dixon (Lulu Roman) take full advantage of the food served on board. Ted gives Annabelle an ultimatum: either the kids fly home or he does. Effie gets sick but refuses to let Doc examine her.

Guest stars: Misty Rowe

16629"The Fountain of Youth"Robert ScheererUnknownMay 7, 1983 (1983-05-07)
"Bad Luck Cabin"
"Uncle Daddy"
Decades ago, Dwight Scoffield (David Wayne) bilked Henry Harper in a land deal. Taking a cruise with granddaughter Stacy (Michelle Tobin), Dwight encounters Henry (Ted McGinley), who claims a fountain of youth is responsible for his not aging in the past fifty years. Newlyweds Cora (Lynda Goodfriend) and Edwin Winnaker (David Naughton) are booked into Cabin 213 on the Fiesta Deck, which Gopher claims is a bad luck cabin for all newlyweds. Sure enough, as soon as Cora and Edwin arrive, a string of bad luck begins for the couple. Isaac's widowed friend Gayle Davis (Tracy Reed) is on the cruise with her son, Bobby (Shavar Ross). Gayle has marriage on her mind, but Isaac isn't sure that he's ready for matrimony.

Season 7 (1983–84)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
167
168
1
2
"The Pledge" Robert Scheerer Lan O'KunOctober 1, 1983 (1983-10-01)
"East Meets West"Christopher Vane & Jill Baer
"Dear Roberta"Lawrence Levy & Robert Spears
"My Two Dumplings"Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller

A woman with a heart condition falls for a man wanted in the U.S. for manslaughter. The police detective who tracked him down is also on the cruise. Doc meets a woman who spent much of her adult life in China and is more of a fan of Eastern than Western medicine. She even helps cure the Captain's back spasms. A man who writes a newspaper column under a fictitious woman's name meets a woman who blames the column for her recent divorce. A friend of Gopher's who is dating two women is on board to decide which one he truly loves, unaware that both women are also on the cruise.

Guest stars: Ursula Andress as Carole, Susan Anton as Leslie, Michael Constantine as Charlie, Linda Evans as Barbara, John Forsythe as Burt, Lee Horsley as Greg, Pat Klous as Laurie, Lee Majors as Robert, Erin Moran as Joanne
1693"Bricker's Boy"Jerome CourtlandStory by: Bernie Kopell & Fred GrandyOctober 8, 1983 (1983-10-08)
"Lotions of Love"Lloyd Turner & Howard Liebling
"The Hustlers"John Whelpley
Teleplay by: Tony Webster

A young man claims that he is Doc's son; an ad executive collaborates on a campaign with the daughter of his latest client; a professional escort of an older woman falls for another younger woman.

Guest stars: Chuck Connors as Roy, Lydia Cornell as Sandy, Constance Forslund as Fran, Brodie Greer as Andy O'Neal, Evelyn Keyes as Mrs. Parker, Ted McGinley as Gary Thomas, Vera Miles as Arlene Kemper, Timothy Patrick Murphy as David
1704"Youth Takes a Holiday"Robert ScheererDavid Ketchum & Tony DiMarcoOctober 15, 1983 (1983-10-15)
"Don't Leave Home Without It"Richard A. Goldman
"Prisoner of Love"Donald Ross

An Army captain sets her sights on Gopher; a married couple meets up with two swingers.

Guest stars: Gloria DeHaven, Jamie Farr, Beth Howland, Heather Locklear, Louis Nye, Charlotte Rae, Glenn Scarpelli, Cornel Wilde
1715"Rhino of the Year"Don WeisUnknownOctober 22, 1983 (1983-10-22)
"One Last Time"
"For Love or Money"

A divorcing couple decides they'll go another round before the final papers come; a do-gooder hires a sex therapist to help an impotent friend.

Guest stars: Mike Douglas, Paul Kreppel, Kevin McCarthy, Donna Pescow, Paul Sand, Stella Stevens
1726"Friend of the Family" Ted Lange Jerry WinnickOctober 29, 1983 (1983-10-29)
"Affair on Demand"Ronnie Cass & Donald Ross
"Just Another Pretty Face"Joan Brooker & Alexandra Stoddart

A man cons his wife into insisting he has an affair; a man orders an end to the romance between his daughter and his best friend.

Guest stars: Cathryn Damon, Florence Henderson, Gordon Jump, Kim Lankford, Robert Reed, Deborah Shelton, Clint Walker
173
174
7
8
"When Worlds Collide"Jerome CourtlandUnknownNovember 5, 1983 (1983-11-05)
"The Captain and the Geisha"
"The Lottery Winners"
"The Emperor's Fortune"

On a Japanese junket, a teacher impersonates a geisha to stay near the Captain; lottery winners carry their rags-to-riches routine to comic heights; a girl and her mother fall in love with two strangers. Guest stars: Tony Danza as Bud O'Hara, Mariette Hartley as Martha Chambers, Ted Knight as Barney Gordon, Harvey Korman as Harvey Willis, Jean Marsh as Celia Hoffman, Rita Moreno as Gladys Gordon, Nancy Morgan as Joanie Hoffman, John Ritter as Ben Cummins, James Shigeta as Bud's Father, and Heather Thomas as Lila Pearsall

  • Nancy Morgan and John Ritter were married during filming.
1759"Long Time No See"Don WeisRichard A. GoldmanNovember 12, 1983 (1983-11-12)
"Bear Essence"Mike Marmer
"Kisses and Makeup"Story by: Ben Joelson & Art Baer
Teleplay by: Hollace White & Stephanie Garman

A carnival owner gets mixed messages from a woman; a comedy duo falls for the same woman.

Guest stars: Crystal Bernard, Dean Butler, Howard Keel, Michael Lembeck, Christopher Mayer, Randi Oakes, Jan Smithers
17610"Julie and the Bachelor" Richard Kinon David Ketchum & Tony DiMarcoNovember 19, 1983 (1983-11-19)
"Set-up for Romance"Lloyd Turner & Howard Liebling
"Intensive Care"Jim Rogers

An executive is entangled in an affair between his co-worker and their boss; Doc and Gopher are smitten by a pretty nurse but her invalid charge interferes.

Guest stars: Tom Bosley, Patricia Carr, Bradford Dillman, Penny Fuller, Mark Harmon, Engelbert Humperdinck, Cristina Raines
17711"The World's Greatest Kisser"Ted LangeBuddy AtkinsonNovember 26, 1983 (1983-11-26)
"Don't Take My Wife, Please"Richard A. Goldman
"The Reluctant Father"Martin Donovan

A jilted fiancé hires a Mata Hari to find the crew member that ruined his wedding plans; a junior executive suffers in silence while his boss lusts after his bride. Guest stars: Kirstie Alley, Danielle Brisebois, William Christopher, David Doyle, Dan Haggerty, Cindy Hayes, Elaine Joyce, Parker Stevenson

  • Kirstie Alley and Parker Stevenson were dating during the filming of this episode and married in December after the episode aired.
17812"Dee Dee's Dilemma"Richard KinonHoward Albrecht & Sol WeinsteinDecember 3, 1983 (1983-12-03)
"Julie's Blind Date"Jill Baer & Christopher Vane
"The Prize Winner"Tony Webster

A woman (Markie Post), who is being sought by a private detective (Don Gordon) to testify in a messy divorce case, sneaks on board disguised as a young girl. With and without her disguise, she finds herself being pursued by a father (Geoffrey Scott) and his son (Clark Brandon), respectively. A guy (Walter Olkewicz) whom Julie (Lauren Tewes) was set up with is not exactly her type; but before she could dump him, he dumps her, and this bruises her ego. An author (Tom Poston) who recently won a literary prize, comes on board with his wife (Abby Dalton) and his assistant (Leslie Easterbrook). The assistant knows that the book he wrote was not entirely written by him and is using this knowledge to blackmail him into having an affair with her.

Guest stars: Clark Brandon as Jerry Howard, Abby Dalton as Ellen Baker, Leslie Easterbrook as Wendy, Don Gordon as Frank Fenimore, Walter Olkewicz as Leonard Gluck, Markie Post as Doris Holden / Dee Dee, Tom Poston as Daniel Baker, and Geoffrey Scott as Phil Howard.
17913"The Misunderstanding"Robert ScheererMichael GraceDecember 10, 1983 (1983-12-10)
"Love Below Decks"Story by: McLean Stevenson & Mike Marmer
"The End Is Near"Rick Shaw & Brian Pollock
Teleplay by: Mike Marmer

A retired actress (Claire Trevor) seeks help from her son-in-law (James Houghton) in effecting a reconciliation with her daughter (Morgan Brittany); a widowed passenger (Arlene Dahl) has a shipboard romance with the ship's engineer (Vic Tayback); two newlyweds (Delta Burke and Lou Richards) cause havoc as the husband is convinced the world is coming to an end.

Guest stars: Morgan Brittany, Delta Burke, Arlene Dahl, James Houghton, Lou Richards, Vic Tayback, Claire Trevor
18014"The Last Case"Richard A. WellsDavid AbramsDecember 17, 1983 (1983-12-17)
"Looking for Mr. Wilson"N/A
"Love on Strike"Story by: Ben Joelson & Art Baer
Teleplay by: Richard Albrecht & Casey Keller

A detective traveling with his secretary investigates the case of a vanished passenger; an engaged couple is harassed by his jilted fiancée.

Guest stars: Claude Akins, Didi Conn, Tony Dow, Grant Goodeve, John Hillerman, Allyn Ann McLerie, Wendy Schaal, Jeannie Wilson, R.J. Williams
18115"How Do I Love Thee?"Kim FriedmanMike MarmerJanuary 7, 1984 (1984-01-07)
"No More Alimony"Howard Albrecht & Sol Weinstein
"Authoress! Authoress!"Tony Webster

Captain Stubing reunites with an old friend (Rue McClanahan) but when she shows up for a cruise breakfast with bruises, he suspects her salesman husband (Dick Van Patten) is abusing her; a man named Alan Price (Alan Thicke) tries to rush his ex-wife Sheila (Michelle Phillips) into marrying her new fiance Lou (Fred Willard) so he will no longer have to pay alimony; Aunt Sylvia (Carol Channing) and her friend Betsy (Betty White) try to persuade a famous publisher (Cesar Romero) to print Betsy's memoirs.

Guest stars: Carol Channing as Aunt Sylvia Duvall, Rue McClanahan as Laura Thornton Hayes, Michelle Phillips as Sheila Price, Cesar Romero as John Drake, Alan Thicke as Alan Price, Dick Van Patten as George Hayes, Betty White as Betsy Boucher, and Fred Willard as Lou.

Also Starring: Christie Claridge as Cindy
18216"For Better or Worse"Richard KinonUnknownJanuary 14, 1984 (1984-01-14)
"The Buck Stops Here"
"Bet on It"

A gambling cruise for charity proves a chancy thing for a teacher (McLean Stevenson), two honeymooners (Leah Ayres and Shea Farrell), and the charity drive chairwoman (Celeste Holm).

Guest Stars: Leah Ayres as Nancy Sidon, Shea Farrell as Stewart Sidon, Celeste Holm as Florence Flanders, Richard Jaeckel as Frank Bannon, Jo Ann Pflug as Sally, and McLean Stevenson as Michael Borden.

Other Guests: Antony Ponzini as Al Dixon, Gil Mandelik as Croupier, and Sam Nickens as Ship Passenger (uncredited).
18317"Aunt Emma, I Love You"Don WeisUnknownJanuary 21, 1984 (1984-01-21)
"Hoopla"
"The First Romance"

Bound for an exhibition game, the Harlem Globetrotters become wary of their promoter; a painting ruins a second honeymoon.

Guest stars: Sid Caesar, Bert Convy, Irena Ferris, Darrow Igus, Rose Marie, Philip McKeon, Jimmy Blacklock, Lou Dunbar, Billy Ray Hobley, Curly Neal, Gator Rivers, and the Harlem Globetrotters ("Hoopla")
18418"Ace in the Hole"Richard KinonUnknownJanuary 28, 1984 (1984-01-28)
"Uncle Joey's Song"
"Father in the Cradle"

A photographer (Ted McGinley) joins the crew and when all the girls — especially two sisters (Julie Ronnie and K.C. Winkler) who Doc and Gopher are interested in — throw themselves at him, it makes the guys unhappy. The retired host of a children's show, “Uncle Joey” (Barnard Hughes), comes aboard and tries to help a traumatized boy (David Faustino), whose father died recently. A guy (Michael Spound) comes aboard to meet his mother (Lee Meriwether), who just got married but is not happy that the guy (Dean Paul Martin) she married is almost his age.

Guest stars: Barnard Hughes as Joseph Stobble, Dean Paul Martin as Brad Elliott, Ted McGinley as Ashley 'Ace' Covington Evans, Lee Meriwether as Jessica Chapman-Elliott, Michael Spound as Larry Chapman, and Carlene Watkins as Mrs. Susan Russell.

Other Guests: David Faustino as Scott Russell, Julie Ronnie as Jeannie Colby, K.C. Winkler as Caroline Colby, and David Armstrong as Passenger (uncredited).

Note: Ted McGinley is listed as a Guest Star in the opening credits, and introduced in the opening scene as the new ship’s photographer, and a longtime family friend to Gopher. In the final scene, Ace explains to the Captain that he will be taking full-time photography classes and be back in three weeks.
185
186
19
20
"Polly's Poker Palace"Richard KinonUnknownFebruary 4, 1984 (1984-02-04)
"Shop Ahoy"
"Double Date"
"The Hong Kong Affair"
"Two Tails of a City"

On a Hong Kong cruise: a Senator romances a woman until he learns the nature of her visit; two brothers date Julie and Vicki; a woman passenger is a shopaholic; a retired spy is on vacation and romances a woman passenger.

Guest stars: Herb Edelman as Robert Savage, Noel Harrison as Trevor Staines, Pamela Hensley as Kathy James, Gene Kelly as Charles Dane, Lee Majors II as Jimmy Adams, Frank Maxwell as Colonel Charles Holmsey, Leigh McCloskey as Peter Adams, Yvette Mimieux as Leni Martek, Ben Murphy as Matthew Saver, Donna Reed as Polly Sullivan, Brenda Vaccaro as Eleanor Savage, and Efrem Zimbalist Jr. as Senator Dan Whitman
18721"Ace's Valet"UnknownUnknownFebruary 25, 1984 (1984-02-25)
"Mother Comes First"
"Hit or Miss America"

Ace's parents send the family valet, Ernest Finley (Jeremy Brett), to be his valet on the ship, but Ace is afraid that Finley will embarrass him in front of the other crew members. Mrs. Rhodes (Marian Mercer) is afraid of growing old, so her daughter Jenny (Audrey Landers) tries to fix her up with eligible men, by recruiting Gopher to pose as an Eastern Indian named Punjab Singh. Isaac's high school friend, Cassie (Gloria Gifford), wants him to be her date for their upcoming reunion, but he only has eyes for Vanessa Williams, who is one of four Miss Americas on board. And Vanessa has an admirer of her own, Tyrone (Glynn Turman).

Miss America (Vanessa Williams) dazzles Isaac; A woman (Audrey Landers) seeks a date for her mother; A butler complicates Ace's job.

Guest Stars: Jeremy Brett as Ernest Finley, Audrey Landers Jenny Rhodes, Ted McGinley as Ashley 'Ace' Covington Evans, Marian Mercer as Mrs. Rhodes, Glynn Turman as Tyrone, and Vanessa Williams as herself (as Miss America 1984).

Other Guests: Gloria Gifford as Cassie Jones, Jean Bartel as herself (as Miss America 1943), Marian McKnight as herself (as Miss America 1957), and Nancy Fleming as herself (as Miss America 1961).
18822"The Lady and the Maid"Richard KinonUnknownMarch 3, 1984 (1984-03-03)
"Love Is Blind"
"The Babymakers"

A ship's maid (Luise Rainer) has resented her twin sister for decades; Barry (Kin Shriner) and Sheila (Jenilee Harrison) take a scientific approach to conception; Isaac and blind Darnell (LaVar Burton) compete for Terry Cook (Shari Belafonte).

Guest Stars: Don Ameche
18923"Side by Side"Richard KinonMike MarmerMarch 10, 1984 (1984-03-10)
"A Fish Out of Water"
"Rub Me Tender"

A teenage boy (Ross Harris (actor)) is preoccupied with his Grandma's (Glynis Johns) health. An awkward man (Ed Begley Jr.) meets an unusual woman (Mary Crosby) while snooping. Gopher hires a woman (Mandy Perryment) as a masseuse but doesn't have time to tell Merrill, who falls for her.

Guest Stars: Nita Talbot, Leigh Lombardi
19024"A Rose Is Not a Rose"UnknownUnknownMarch 17, 1984 (1984-03-17)
"Novelties"
"Too Rich and Too Thin"

A man impersonating a female singer gets double trouble when a passenger falls for the singer and Julie falls for him; a novelty salesman has difficulty separating business from pleasure.

Guest Stars: Don Adams, Jaime Lyn Bauer, Arte Johnson, Rich Little, and Audrey Meadows.
191
192
25
26
"Dreamboat"Robert ScheererUnknownMay 5, 1984 (1984-05-05)
"Gopher, Isaac & the Starlet"
"The Parents"
"The Importance of Being Johnny"
"Julie and the Producer"

A Hollywood movie company is filming a musical called Dream Boat on board the ship with plans to use both crew and passengers as extras. Starlet Shelley Rush (Melba Moore) desperately wants to audition for the production crew but can't seem to get their attention. Merrill falls for faded star Angela Lovett (Alexis Smith), while Vicki is enamored of Johnny Lovett (Jimmy Osmond), a rock star who has never acted before, is very apprehensive about his debut, and takes it out on Vicki by being rude to her. Producer Marty Chenault (Dean Jones) is the older brother of Jack Chenault, whom Julie almost married once.

Also guest starring: Ben Vereen, David L. Lander, Juliet Prowse
19327"Best Ex-Friends"Ted LangeUnknownMay 12, 1984 (1984-05-12)
"All the Congressman's Women"
"Three Faces of Love"

Isaac is taken with the new barmaid (Eugenia Wright), but it gets complicated when Gopher tells him to fire her. A movie makeup man (Sal Viscuso) tests his fiancée's (Heidi Bohay) fidelity. Meanwhile, a congressman (Sam Groom) brings his daughter (Tori Spelling) aboard the Pacific Princess after receiving letters threatening her young life, which comes between him and his fiancée (Phyllis Davis).

Guest Stars: (Heidi Bohay) as Suzy Rand, (Phyllis Davis) as Gayle Ludwig, (Sam Groom) as Congressman Blake Gibson, (Tori Spelling) as Penny Gibson, (Sal Viscuso) as Wendell Shamer, and (Eugenia Wright) as Tina Burrell.

Other Guests: (Fred Leaf) as Burt Reynolds look-alike.

Note: This was the final appearance of (Lauren Tewes), as she was fired before filming commenced for Season 8.

Season 8 (1984–85)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
1941"The Crew's Cruise Director"UnknownUnknownSeptember 22, 1984 (1984-09-22)
"What a Drag"
"Doc's Slump (Alaska Cruise)"

The crew is working a special Alaskan cruise:

  • All the passengers are women who are vying for a date with Engelbert Humperdinck.
  • Because Julie has married, the crew has a new cruise director, the terrorizing Bernice (Diane Ladd). Meanwhile, Julie's recently divorced sister Judy (Pat Klous) is aboard.
  • Harry (Bert Convy) fears he's inadequate for wife Jane (Patty Duke), the cruise's organizer. He and his friend Ralph (Arte Johnson) pose as women to follow Jane.
  • Doc's romance with Emily (Michelle Phillips) crumbles.

Also Guest Starring: Lydia Cornell as Bonnie, Rebecca Holden as Diane, Selma Archerd as Mrs. Carter, Anulka Dziubinska as Ginger, and Linda Stayer as Angie.

Notes: This is a 90-minute episode. Patty Duke is credited as Patty Duke Astin. Pat Klous is credited as Patricia Klous. Julie (Lauren Tewes) does not appear in this episode. Klous joins the cast, as does Ted McGinley as "Your Ship's Photographer," Ashley "Ace" Covington Evans.

195
196
2
3
"Vicki and the Fugitive"UnknownUnknownSeptember 29, 1984 (1984-09-29)
"Lady in the Window"
"Stolen Years"
"Dutch Treat"

The crew works a Netherlands voyage:

The Netherlands voyage concludes with heartbreak for Vicki. Also Guest Starring: Tim Robbins as young Erik.

1974"Ace Meets the Champ"UnknownUnknownOctober 6, 1984 (1984-10-06)
"Why Justin Can't Read"
"Call Me a Doctor"
Ace tries to impress an old girlfriend (Jennifer Holmes) by boxing the heavyweight champion (Dick Butkus). A father (James Noble) refuses to believe his son (Dick Billingsley) may be dyslexic, which the son's tutor (Jeannie Wilson) believes he may be. An overbearing mother (Doris Roberts) tells lies about her daughter (Tovah Feldshuh) to a fellow passenger (Louis Giambalvo).
1985"Only the Good Die Young"UnknownUnknownOctober 13, 1984 (1984-10-13)
"Honey Beats the Odds"
"The Light of Another Day"

An undercover FBI agent (Jack Riley) butters up a bookie (James Sloyan)'s girlfriend (Stephanie Faracy) to get the scoop on his operation. Believing that good people die young, a charming boy (Emmanuel Lewis) goes on a rampage of bad behavior. A blind passenger (Barbara Parkins) reunites with a passenger (John Bennett Perry), with whom she went to college and had a crush on.

Also Guest Starring: Vernee Watson-Johnson as Lydia Somers.
1996"Soap Gets in Your Eyes"UnknownUnknownOctober 20, 1984 (1984-10-20)
"A Match Made in Heaven"
"Tugs of the Heart"

A dead man (Bill Macy) must perform a selfless act to get into heaven, with an angel (Fritz Weaver) watching. Gopher is leery of a girl (Dianne Kay) who rejected his marriage proposal years ago. A soap opera fan (Jayne Meadows) confuses an actor (Charles Frank) for the villainous character he plays when he and her daughter (Susan Blanchard) get together.

Also Guest Starring: Juliet Mills as Blair Chapman; Nedra Volz as a passenger.
2007"And One to Grow On"UnknownUnknownOctober 27, 1984 (1984-10-27)
"Seems Like Old Times"
"I'll Never Forget What's Her Name"
Vicki has too much champagne on her 18th birthday, before learning of her father's history of alcoholism. Arthur (Richard Kline) tries to renew a relationship with his former fiancée Rose (Morgan Brittany) by pretending to have amnesia. Using information provided by a private detective (Alex Rocco), Deborah (Joan Van Ark) tracks down her college boyfriend Larry (Robert Reed).
2018"Aerobic April"UnknownUnknownNovember 3, 1984 (1984-11-03)
"The Wager"
"Story of the Century"

April Lopez (Charo) comes aboard as the ship's new aerobics instructor. Rich brothers (Ben Murphy and Charles Siebert) bet $1 million that they will not fall in love on the cruise. A reporter (Ralph Bellamy) pursues a woman (Dorothy McGuire) to get the story that she is aviator Amelia Earhart.

Also Guest Starring Gordon Jump as Nathan Wills, Mary Kate McGeehan as Anne Loring.
2029"The Last Heist"UnknownUnknownNovember 10, 1984 (1984-11-10)
"Starting Over"
"Watching the Master"
Judy's friend Beth (Deborah Adair) can't trust men after the rape and subsequent divorce until she meets fellow passenger Joe (Brodie Greer). Paula (Julia Duffy) wants her jewel-thief uncle David (Patrick Macnee) to retire, but he's after a diamond necklace belonging to Martha (Abby Dalton). Meanwhile, Paula falls for Andy (Douglas Barr). Hal (William Christopher), engaged to Doc's ex-wife Samantha, studies his every move as inspiration to be a perfect husband. This puts a crimp in Doc's fling with Gloria (Delta Burke).
20310"By Hook or by Crook"UnknownUnknownNovember 17, 1984 (1984-11-17)
"Revenge with Proper Stranger"
"Don't Get Mad, Get Even"
Depressed on what would have been her wedding anniversary, Judy falls for soft-spoken Mike Morell (Patrick Wayne), which worries Gopher, who harbors a gut feeling that Morell is not to be trusted. Doc's first patient Missy (Heidi Bohay) plans to have an affair and even the score with her loving husband Jack (William R. Moses), who had an accidental affair a few months earlier. Missy chooses Lester Erwin (Ken Kercheval), a loser who fancies himself a ladies' man. Consumer advocate Marvin Cooperman (Ray Buktenica) keeps taking his work home with him but balks when his wife Carol (Jan Smithers) considers taking a job with her former sorority sister Ellen Brown (Devon Ericson), a baked goods manufacturer who makes Marvin's favorite brownies.
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11
12
"My Mother, My Chaperone"UnknownUnknownNovember 24, 1984 (1984-11-24)
"The Present"
"The Death and Life of Sir Alfred Demerest"
"Welcome Aboard"

The crew journeys to London and Paris:

20613"Paying the Piper"UnknownUnknownDecember 1, 1984 (1984-12-01)
"Baby Sister"
"Help Wanted"

After twenty-three years of marriage, Shirley Enicker (Rue McClanahan) wants to live comfortably, rather than continue to be a penny pincher. Her frugal and cheap husband Howard (Donald O'Connor) doesn't like the changes that are in store for their marriage. Eve Springer (Vera Miles) is on board with her two daughters, Eleanor (Jaime Lyn Bauer) and Patty (Dana Plato). Eleanor doesn't like fast romances because she got burned one years ago, claiming it ruined her life. Eleanor overprotects Patty, trying to throw cold water on her shipboard fling with Peter Barkan (Christopher Knight). Merrill's friend's niece, Kim Carlisle (Michelle Johnson), is an energetic intern rotating through the different jobs on the ship. Unfortunately, she fails at all of them.

Note: Michelle Johnson appears as Kim in a recurring role throughout the season.
20714"Country Blues"UnknownUnknownDecember 8, 1984 (1984-12-08)
"A Matter of Taste"
"Frat Brothers Forever"
Country music singer-songwriter Billy Boy Bodine (Matt McCoy) cruises with his manager Cappy (Claude Akins). Cappy tries to come between Billy and adoring admirer Arlene Cort (Leah Ayres) because Billy writes his best music when he's depressed. Shipboard neighbors Simon Ashford (Farley Granger) and Valerie Frasier (Terry Moore) are interior designers engaged in cutthroat competition to win the contract to redecorate the ship, stopping at nothing to sabotage each other. Doc enjoys a visit from his fraternity brother Buzz McLaine (Roy Thinnes), who travels with his cousin Jim Dolan (Michael McGrady). But things are not what they seem.
20815"Santa, Santa, Santa"UnknownUnknownDecember 15, 1984 (1984-12-15)
"Another Dog Gone Christmas"
"Noel's Christmas Carol"

On a Christmas cruise, three men (Avery Schreiber, Ray Walston, and Scatman Crothers) are scheduled to play one jolly St. Nick. Vicki gives her dog (Tundra the Wonder Dog) to a lonely comic (Howard Morris). Carol Kelsey (Kim Lankford) asks Ace to pose as her fiancé and fool her mother (Anne Francis). Ace's friend Noel Kane (Shea Farrell) complicates things by falling for Carol.

Judy, Gopher, and Isaac each hire a Santa, who don't get along and try to outdo each other. To placate her mother, a woman asks Ace to pose as her fiancé. A has-been comic finds his career resurrected by an abandoned dog.

‘’Guest Stars:’’ Scatman Crothers as Malcolm, Shea Farrell as Noel Kane, Anne Francis as Mrs. Kelsey (credited as Anne Lloyd Francis), Michelle Johnson as Kim Carlisle, Kim Lankford as Carol Kelsey, Howard Morris as Billy Banks, Avery Schreiber as Patrick Turney, Tundra the Wonder Dog as Tundra (as Tundra), and Ray Walston as Max Phelps.

‘’Other Guests:’’ Justin Gocke as Mark, Cherilyn Milton as Mark's mother (credited as Mother), and Hector Hernandez as Steward.

‘’Others:’’ Stephen Shortridge (uncredited).
20916"Instinct"UnknownUnknownJanuary 5, 1985 (1985-01-05)
"Unmade for Each Other"
"BOS"
Shelley (Vic Tayback) and Leslie (Conrad Bain) are on a cruise to meet their matches chosen by a computer dating service. Discovering they were matched with each other, both meet Joan (Janet Leigh) and both pursue her. Isaac pretends to accept Lynda's (Berlinda Tolbert)'s self-help philosophy. Emelyne (Irlene Mandrell), who was supposed to travel with her boyfriend, discovers he's not coming and sent Neil (Bruce Penhall) to keep her company. Neil says her boyfriend is with her best friend, but she learns he's not being completely honest with her.
21017"Ace Takes the Test"UnknownUnknownJanuary 12, 1985 (1985-01-12)
"The Counterfeit Couple"
"The Odd Triple"
Donna and Gus Braddock (Teresa Ganzel and Christopher Mayer) want Ace to father their child. Strangers Barbara and Lyle (Erin Moran and Richard Gilliland) pose as newlyweds after a mix-up puts them in the honeymoon suite. Annette (Mary Ann Mobley) competes with her daughter, Susie (Crystal Bernard) for Gopher's company.
21118"Love on the Line"UnknownUnknownJanuary 26, 1985 (1985-01-26)
"Don't Call Me Gopher"
"Her Honor, the Mayor"
Corporate bigwig and workaholic John Stockton (Cesar Romero) meets charming but slightly evasive Marcy Banes (Jane Wyatt), not realizing she is the switchboard operator in his office building. Big-time advertising executive Janet Thompson (Katherine Moffat) reunites with her friend Gopher, whose adamant insistence that people call him Burl winds up alienating all his friends in the process. Newly elected mayor Frances Hardy (Shelley Fabares) is on the cruise with her campaign manager Barry Singer (David Hedison), but falls for Phil Haines (Robert Fuller), the city council president whom she beat for the elected office.
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213
19
20
"Girl of the Midnight Sun"Robert ScheererRay Jessel & Cynthia ThompsonFebruary 2, 1985 (1985-02-02)
"There'll Be Some Changes Made"Donald Ross
"Too Many Isaacs"Story by: Sid Morse
Teleplay by: Mike Marmer
"Mr. Smith Goes to Stockholm"Richard Goldman

A Scandinavian cruise on the Royal Viking Sky begins in London and travels through Oslo and Stockholm:

  • Grant Cooper (John Davidson), vice president of promotions for a suntan lotion, seeks a native Scandinavian female from dozens of applicants to be the company spokesperson. Greta Lund (Christopher Norris) impersonates a native Scandinavian in hopes of winning.
  • Lonely Mel Davis (Jack Klugman) thinks women don't like him because of his large nose. Planning to get cosmetic surgery in Stockholm, he meets Kay Webber (Susannah York). She falls in love with him but thinks he's planning a different kind of surgery.
  • Scientist Dr. Fabian Cain (Telly Savalas) creates a robot duplicate of Isaac and plans to use him for nefarious purposes. He's helped by aspiring actress Delia Parks (Janet Jackson), who may or may not be in love with Isaac.
  • Wealthy Swedish actress Helga Bjorsson (Priscilla Barnes) captivates Gopher.
  • Grant and Ace go to Greta's parent's home for a photo shoot with her.
  • Kay expresses concern to Doc about Mel's operation.
  • Dr. Cain tries out Isaac's robot double in public, while the real Isaac goes on a romantic boat ride with Delia.
  • Gopher leaves the cruise line to work with Helga.
21421"Ace Takes a Holiday"UnknownUnknownFebruary 9, 1985 (1985-02-09)
"The Runaway"
"Courier"
A courier (Michael Spound) refuses to remove the briefcase handcuffed to his wrist but still pursues a fellow passenger (Charlene Tilton). Irene (Florence Henderson) can't understand her daughter's (Tracy Nelson)'s hostility toward her stepfather (Peter Mark Richman). Ace is temporarily sidelined with an injured foot, replaced by Kim, and nursed to health by passenger Lisa (Marla Heasley).
21522"Getting Started"UnknownUnknownFebruary 16, 1985 (1985-02-16)
"Daughter's Dilemma"
"The Captain Wears Pantyhose"

The Captain fails Officer Deirdre Crichton (Cathy Lee Crosby) when she tests for a captaincy. Paul (Jimmy Osmond) is convinced that his father's surprise birthday present is a prostitute (Karen Kopins). Nancy (Tracy Reed) has a dislike for her father(Bernie Hamilton)'s on-board romance (Esther Rolle).

Also Guest Starring: Glenn Scarpelli as Boomer; James A. Watson Jr. as James.
21623"Vicki's Gentleman Caller"UnknownUnknownFebruary 23, 1985 (1985-02-23)
"Partners to the End"
"The Perfect Arrangement"
Captain Stubing isn't pleased when Marc Silverton (James MacArthur), an older man, charms Vicki. Business partners Lou Tangle (James Coco) and Stan Garner (David Doyle) have borrowed money from loan sharks to meet their company's payroll. Their plan to have Lou fake his death so they can collect the insurance money and pay back the sharks is complicated when fellow passenger Harriet Wolters (Ruta Lee) seems attracted to Lou. Bicoastal television personalities Jennifer Kearn (Cristina Raines) and Tom Whitlaw (Richard Hatch) have been married for six months but have spent little time together until their cruise.
21724"Judy Hits a Low Note"UnknownUnknownMarch 23, 1985 (1985-03-23)
"Love Times Two"
"The Problem with Papa"
Without an audition, producer Phil (James Houghton) hires Judy to sing in a commercial. Roger (Barry Van Dyke) is drawn to his wife Terry (Ellen Bry)'s best friend Courtney (Judy Landers). Louise (Jessica Walter) fears her father (John McIntire) is senile.
21825"Charmed, I'm Sure"UnknownUnknownMarch 30, 1985 (1985-03-30)
"Ashes to Ashes"
"No Dad of Mine"
Ace reunites with an old girlfriend (Morgan Brittany) who is now in a wheelchair. A couple (Jimmie Walker and Telma Hopkins) take advantage of the cruise to quit smoking. A man and woman (John Beck and Cathy Silvers) hide that they are relatives.
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220
26
27
"Caribbean Cruise: Call Me Grandma"UnknownUnknownMay 4, 1985 (1985-05-04)
"A Gentleman of Discretion"
"The Perfect Divorce"
"Letting Go"

The crew works a Caribbean voyage:

  • A British ex-military officer (Stewart Granger), escorting singing sensations Menudo, is tired of a woman (Lana Turner) who lies.
  • Jim and Dianne Tipton (Jared Martin and Hayley Mills) are bewildered by Doc and his visiting ex-wife Nancy (Elizabeth Ashley) being very much in love, especially since Doc attributes it to why they divorced.
  • Vicki falls for Curtis (Timothy Patrick Murphy), who is continually pampered by a mother (Anne Baxter) who refuses to see him as anything other than a child.
  • Larry (Andrew Stevens) is being set up for a sex-discrimination lawsuit by Anne (Linda Purl), who is disguised as a man.
  • Elizabeth falls for Thomas.
  • Anne continues to pose as a man while on the ship.
  • Jim and Dianne reconsider their relationship.
  • Curtis proposes to Vicki.

Note: This is Michelle Johnson's last episode as Kim.

Season 9 (1985–86)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
2211"A Day in Port"Kim FriedmanPaula A. RothSeptember 28, 1985 (1985-09-28)
"The Villa"Michael L. Grace
"The Racer's Edge"Jill Baer
"Love or Money"Mike Marmer

The ship gets a makeover and gains new dancers. Isaac gets a surprising visit from a former girlfriend who wants to renew with him. Introducing the Love Boat Mermaids. Their choreographer is Phylicia Ayers-Allen (a.k.a. Phylicia Rashad).

The Mermaids' choreographer charms Isaac; Gopher plays mediator; Doc looks after Gopher's girlfriend; Judy falls for a mysterious man.

The Love Boat Mermaids include: Debbie Bartlett as Susie – Love Boat Mermaid (credited as Deborah Bartlett); Tori Brenno as Maria – Love Boat Mermaid; Nanci L. Hammond as Jane – Love Boat Mermaid (credited as Nanci Lynn Hammond); Teri Hatcher as Amy – Love Boat Mermaid; Debra Johnson as Patti – Love Boat Mermaid; Macarena as Sheila – Love Boat Mermaid; Andrea Moenas as Starlight – Love Boat Mermaid (credited as Andrea Moen); and Beth Myatt as Mary Beth – Love Boat Mermaid.

Guest Stars: Phylicia Rashad as Lonette Becker (credited as Phylicia Ayers Allen), Conrad Bain as Charles Custers, Diane Ladd as Christa Johanson, John Ratzenberger as Marty Elder, Gordon Thomson as Nick Durrell, Ava Cadell as Dee Dee Winters (listed in final credits as Didi Winters), and Steven M. Gagnon as Paul (credited as Steve Gagnon).

Note: This episode introduced the Love Boat Mermaids; it also included a newer version of the introductory credits and the title theme song was now sung by Dionne Warwick.
2222"Your Money or Your Wife"UnknownUnknownOctober 5, 1985 (1985-10-05)
"Joint Custody"
"The Temptations"

Vicki is thrilled to let everyone know that she got the famous band the Temptations to perform during the cruise. A couple fights each other to gain custody of their son.

The Temptations board with their manager; a loan shark (Vic Tayback) bargains for a date; the captain becomes involved in a kidnapping.

Guest Stars: Franklin Cover as Marvin Brown, Penny Fuller as Catherine Gerra, Charlotte Rae as Milly Brown, Robert Reed as Carl Gerra, Michael Spound as Ted Belmond, Connie Stevens as Heidi Lester, Robert Jayne as Brian Gerard (credited as Bobby Jacoby), and Vic Tayback as Jack Hamilton.

The Temptations as Themselves – Musical Guests: Melvin Franklin as himself (as the Temptations), Richard Street as himself (as the Temptations), Ron Tyson as himself (as the Temptations), Otis Williams as himself (as the Temptations), and Ali-Ollie Woodson as himself (as the Temptations).
2233"Hidden Treasure"UnknownUnknownOctober 12, 1985 (1985-10-12)
"Picture from the Past"
"Ace's Salary"

A couple is looking for a rare stamp hidden somewhere on the boat. Ace and the crew campaign for a salary raise. A woman avoids Andy Warhol, wanting to forget the time she was in one of his movies.

Guest Stars: Milton Berle as Lionel Cooper, Tom Bosley as George Hammond, Peter Duchin as Peter Duchin, Andy Griffith as Larry Cooper, Cloris Leachman as Karen Cooper, Marion Ross as Mary Hammond, Raymond St. Jacques as Ramon, and Andy Warhol as Andy Warhol.

Other Guests: Lisa Dean Ryan as Spock and Vera Perez as B.F.D. Marion Ross and Tom Bosley played husband and wife on the hit ABC show Happy Days

In 1997, TV Guide ranked this episode #82 on its list of the 100 Greatest Episodes. [2]
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4
5
"German Cruise: The Villa"Richard KinonMichael L. GraceNovember 2, 1985 (1985-11-02)
"The Racer's Edge"Jill Baer
"Love or Money"Mike Marmer
"The Accident"Art Baer & Ben Joelson

German Cruise: Part 1 of 2. The crew is now in Germany and among the passengers is a woman (Alexis Smith), whose family estate was taken by a nemesis (Craig Stevens), who runs into an old flame (Mel Ferrer). Doc meets a woman (Susan Blakely), who's traveling with her brother (Ken Olandt), who doesn't warm up to Doc. Later, while they're out, Doc hits a man (Olandt) who appears to be seriously injured. Two sisters (Audrey Landers and Judy Landers), are looking to score a rich guy but, when one of them is attracted to Ace, the other tries to sabotage the relationship. And a biker (Jack Coleman), who just got married (Lisa Whelchel) and is retiring from competition, is being courted by his coach (Harry Morgan), who says he wants him to enter one last race so that the coach can get the job he's trying to get. On the Rivera: a former bike-racing coach (Harry Morgan) tries to lure a newlywed champion (Jack Coleman) out of retirement; a woman (Alexis Smith) wants to visit the family villa before it's sold; Doc feels bad about a young man (Ken Olandt)'s death; two sisters (Audrey Landers and Judy Landers) try to attract wealthy men.

Guest Stars: Susan Blakely as Nicole Phillips, Jack Coleman as Scott Barrett, Mel Ferrer as Jack Powers, Audrey Landers as Brenda Adams-Rosenberg, Judy Landers as Edie Adams-Rosenberg, Harry Morgan as Charly Fields, Ken Olandt as Don Phillips, Alexis Smith as Justina Downey, Craig Stevens as Viktor Lukas, and Lisa Whelchel as Kelly Barrett.

Other Guests: Patti MacLeod as Society Matron (credit only), Richard Wren as Carl Mueller, William Jackson as Alexander Dietrich (credited as William B. Jackson), Peter Kelly as Marcel Villemin, Barbara Ward as Gina, Charles Howard as man at Bar, Sisse Hasbo as Sophia, Ulrich Matschoss as Anton, and Gil Mandelik as Croupier (credit only).

Note: The Love Boat Mermaids did not appear.
2266"Forties Fantasy"UnknownUnknownNovember 16, 1985 (1985-11-16)

Gopher envisions the liner as a World War II troop ship en route to France.

Guest Stars: Charo as Lupe Zapata De Vega Valdez, Nathan Cook as Carl Tysdell, Leigh McCloskey as Charles "Chip" Reynolds, Stephanie Mills as Tara, and Erin Moran as Janet Reynolds.

Other Guests: John Zarchen as Martin and Michael Pniewski as Stefanowicz.
2277"Good Time Girls"UnknownUnknownNovember 23, 1985 (1985-11-23)
"The Iron Man"
"Soap War"

Three college girls (Carrell Myers, Toni Hudson, and Christie Claridge) are mistaken for prostitutes; fitness expert and health book author Andy (Charles Frank) suffers fainting spells during triathlon training and Doc tells him he has diabetes; Judy (Pat Klous) soap opera star aunt Sylvia's (Carol Channing) jealous friend Betsy (Betty White) auditions for a new part on their soap opera with Sylvia's lecherous co-star Roger (Louis Nye).

Judy's soap-star aunt boards; a health-book author finds out what ails him; three women court Ace.

Guest Stars: Carol Channing as Sylvia Bennett, Charles Frank as Andy Singer, Belinda Montgomery as Valerie Singer, Louis Nye as Roger Garrett, and Betty White as Betsy Boucher.

Other Guests: Carrell Myers as Denise, Toni Hudson as Rita, Christie Claridge as Sherry, Don Bovingloh as Howard, Joe Renteria as Ramon, Rose Parrah as Chi Chi, and Anthony Barton as Dean.
2288"Trouble in Paradise"UnknownUnknownNovember 30, 1985 (1985-11-30)
"No More Mister Nice Guy"
"The Mermaid and the Cop"

Julie McCoy asks Gopher for advice when her marriage starts to fall apart. Amy (Teri Hatcher), one of the Mermaid dancers, believes she was involved in a crime and is afraid that a Las Vegas cop who is being friendly to her might recognize her. Ace is forced to fire two employees.

Julie McCoy Chenault (Lauren Tewes) comes back; Ace must prove himself by firing two employees; A police detective woos mermaid Amy.

Guest Stars: Pamela Brull as Linda Hershel, Richard Hatch as Ryan Curly, Lauren Tewes as Julie McCoy Chenault, and David Wayne as Max Marshall.
2299"Roommates"UnknownUnknownDecember 7, 1985 (1985-12-07)
"Heartbreaker"
"Out of the Blue"

New roommates Vicki and Judy have to deal with their opposite habits. A multimillionaire makes everyone's dreams come true. A rich man promises to make wishes come true; Vicki and Judy become roommates; A pro golfer learns the truth about the woman he loves.

Guest Stars: Diana Canova as Christine Bradley, Jeff Conaway as Randy Jackson, Sandy Dennis as Gina Caldwell, and Harvey Korman as Cabot Fairfield.

Other Guests: Toni Lamond as Mrs. Burton and Warren Munson as Edgar Fairchild.
23010"Father of the Bride"UnknownUnknownJanuary 11, 1986 (1986-01-11)
"The Best Man"
"Members of the Wedding"

Love is in the air with a wedding on board. Ace is attracted by the bride that ran away, and the groom is getting closer to her sister. Passengers involved in a shipboard wedding include the nearly bankrupt father of the bride, the best man, and a wedding party-crasher.

Guest Stars: Lydia Cornell as Jackie Ryan Proctor, Fannie Flagg as Laurie Ryan, Robert Mandan as Ernie Ryan, Denver Pyle as Eric Springer, and Morgan Stevens as Kurt Duncan.

Other Guests: John Scott Clough as Matthew Springer (listed as Matt Springer), Elaine Wilkes as Lori Ryan, Archie Hahn as Eldon Lundy, Lou Richards as Andrew Proctor (listed as Doctor Proctor), and Danny Goldman as George Thurlow.
23111"Dare Devil"UnknownUnknownJanuary 18, 1986 (1986-01-18)
"Picture Me as a Spy"
"Sleeper"

Ace's cabin has been searched and he suspects spy teamwork. Doc's new patient is sleepwalking. A woman is scared by her boyfriend's risky stunts. Ace photographs a spy and his daughter; A girl challenges a daredevil (Peter Scolari); Doc helps a senator (Alan Thicke) and his wife.

Guest Stars: Courteney Cox as Carol, Herb Edelman as Dr. Ivan Petrovska (credited as Herbert Edelman), Peter Scolari as Frank Hobbs, Shelley Smith as Phyllis Townsend, Alan Thicke as Senator Bob Townsend, and Kristina Wayborn as Anna Petrovska.

Other Guests: Yakov Smirnoff as Dmitri Kostov.
23212"Hippies and Yuppies"UnknownUnknownJanuary 25, 1986 (1986-01-25)
"Frat Wars"
"Return of the Lambdas"

When a fraternity has the turnover of one of their relics from one chapter to another, the chapter receiving the relic feels the chapter currently in possession of it is not worthy to be part of the fraternity, so the recipient chapter leader (Tim Ryan) tries to make it appear that they violated several of the fraternity's laws so that they would be thrown out. He even sends a girl (Karen L. Scott) to seduce and distract the leader (Steven Eckholdt) of the other group, who seems to keep them in check. And two couples, who were also in the fraternity 20 years ago and were hippies then, meet and while one of them (Larry Wilcox and Carlene Watkins) is still hippie, the other one is now more yuppie (Melanie Chartoff and James Houghton), so they feel as if they don't have anything in common anymore.

Rival fraternities vie to impress the head of their national alumni association; Old college pals find they have different lifestyles.

Guest Stars: Melanie Chartoff as Betty Bell, James Houghton as Buddy Bell, Gordon Jump as Grant Woodrow, Carlene Watkins as Rebecca Davis, and Larry Wilcox as Larry Davis.

Other Guests: Steven Eckholdt as Eric Matthews, Karen L. Scott as Connie Disch, Tim Ryan as Nolan Dickford (aka Timothy Ryan Meinelschmidt), Robbie Rist as Zit, Stephen Lee as Hockstein, Claud Mann as Carnegie, and Daniel Roebuck as S. C. U. Lambda.
23313"Miss Mom"UnknownUnknownFebruary 1, 1986 (1986-02-01)
"Who's the Champ"
"Gopher's Delusion"

Judy thinks a writer (Ben Murphy) of children's books is perfect for her picky cousin (Ellen Bry), who is also pregnant; A pro wrestler (Tim Rossovich) forbids his sister (Jennifer Holmes) to associate with his opponent (Bruce Jenner); Gopher is accidentally hypnotized and given a post-hypnotic suggestion that he's the captain.

Guest Stars: Ellen Bry as Gretchen Sommers, Hulk Hogan as himself, Jennifer Holmes as Linda Sharkey, Caitlyn Jenner as Lover Boy Bob (credited as Bruce Jenner), Ben Murphy as Nathan Paul, and Tim Rossovich as Thomas "The Mangler" Sharkey.

Other Guests: Patrick Cronin as Eddie Dumont, Neil Thompson as The Amazing Zimmerman, and Jim Holmes as Camera Man.
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235
14
15
"Egyptian Cruise: Parts 1 & 2"UnknownUnknownFebruary 8, 1986 (1986-02-08)

Part 1 of 2. Cruising the Nile – the Captain and his friend's widow (Jean Stapleton) share memories; A producer (John Astin) wants a starlet (Deborah Adair) to play Cleopatra; A woman (Catherine Oxenberg) eyes the gold ankh that Doc was given at a bazaar; A busy man (James Sloyan) may lose his schoolteacher wife (Valerie Harper) to a former student.

On the Nile: Stubing meets a widow; Two agents want Doc's souvenir; A couple faces facts; A reporter upsets an actress.

Guest Stars: Deborah Adair as Deborah Grant, John Astin as Michael Sawyer, Joseph Campanella as Nabil El Masri, Chad Everett as Wayne Richmond, Valerie Harper as Laurel Peters, Catherine Oxenberg as Carrie Barton, John Putch as Jason Matthews, Grant Show as Christopher Stuart, James Sloyan as Greg Peters and Jean Stapleton as Helen Branigan.

Other Guests: René Assa as Ahmed and Ken Lewis as Steward.

Note: The Love Boat Mermaids did not appear.
23616"Hello, Emily"UnknownUnknownFebruary 15, 1986 (1986-02-15)
"The Tour Guide"
"The Winning Number"

A widow (Marion Ross) has her eyes on the Captain. A freshly appointed tour guide (Teri Copley) has to deal with a group of demanding senior citizens. A recent lottery winner (Noah Beery Jr.) becomes greedy.

A wealthy businesswoman (Marion Ross) flirts with Stubing; A tour guide loses her group; An $ 8 million lottery winner becomes a boor.

Guest Stars: Noah Beery Jr. as Daryl Wilcox, Teri Copley as Donna Louise Bedford, Virginia Mayo as Virginia Wilcox, Marion Ross as Emily Haywood and Barry Van Dyke as Brandon Cobb.

Other Guests: Martin Hewitt as Kirby Haywood, Isabelle Walker as Karen Haywood, Iris Adrian as Emma Baxter, and Helen Kleeb as Mildred Wiley.
23717"The Second Time Around"UnknownUnknownFebruary 22, 1986 (1986-02-22)
"Hello, Spencer"
"Runaway, Go Home"

The Captain welcomes back a widow (Marion Ross), who has romantic plans for her new cruise. Larry Gatlin is trying to help a runaway (Quinn Cummings).

Stubing proposes to Emily (Marion Ross); A teenage stowaway who meets Larry Gatlin and the Gatlin Brothers; A phony agent who dupes a comedian.

Guest Stars: Quinn Cummings as Anny, Larry Gatlin and The Gatlin Brothers as Themselves – Musical Guests (credited as The Gatlin Brothers), Marion Ross as Emily Haywood, Michael Winslow as Spencer Wilson, Larry Gatlin as himself, Steve Gatlin Rudy Gatlin as himself.
23818"The Art Lover"UnknownUnknownMarch 1, 1986 (1986-03-01)
"Couples"
"Made for Each Other"

Gopher is afraid of getting fired, after breaking a very valuable art piece. Newlyweds (Mary Cadorette and Dean Butler) realize that they have nothing in common besides sex. Gopher breaks a passenger's (Jose Ferrer) priceless statue; Judy is labeled a home-wrecker; Ace snaps a telling shot of two couples.

Guest Stars: Dean Butler as Brent Harper, Mary Cadorette as Darlene Harper, José Ferrer as Simon Beck, Caren Kaye as Paula Mercer, Vicki Lawrence as Betty Logan, David Spielberg as Marc Mercer, Alana Stewart as Miss Enty and Fred Willard as Nil Logan.

Other Guests: Bert Rosario as Julio.
23919"Second Banana"UnknownUnknownMarch 8, 1986 (1986-03-08)
"The Prodigy"
"What Goes Around Comes Around"

An artist (Donald O'Connor) and his orangutan give their last performance during the cruise. Doc falls for a radio psychologist; A gambler (Thomas Bray) risks love; A woman wants to retire her spouse's (Donald O'Connor) orangutan.

Guest Stars: Thom Bray as Lowell Mandell, CJ the Orangutan as Tanny the Orangutan, Patti Davis as Brenda (credited as Patricia Davis), Gloria DeHaven as Mary Halbert, Nancy Dussault as Dr. Dorothee Davis, and Donald O'Connor as Leo Halbert.

Other Guests: Vincent Di Paolo as Passenger (uncredited).
24020"Gothic Romance"UnknownUnknownMarch 15, 1986 (1986-03-15)
"Whatever Happened to Crazy Joe Flash?"
"We'll Meet Again"

Searching for inspiration, a romance novelist (Morgan Brittany) fantasizes that Ace is courting her; A rock star (Joe Regalbuto) tries to act like a regular guy and finds romance with another passenger (Donna Pescow); A couple (Jayne Meadows and Bill Macy) who regularly take the cruise and have the same cabin, for ten years, are really married to other people and sneaking away for the cruise. A disguised rock star faces rejection; A novelist sees Ace as the hero of her next book; Two lovers celebrate their 10th anniversary.

Guest Stars: Jayne Meadows as Janice (credited as Jayne Meadows Allen), Morgan Brittany as Katherine Wilde, Bill Macy as Myles, Donna Pescow as Joyce Anderson, Joe Regalbuto as Herb Hanson / Crazy Joe Flash, and Michael Young as Henry Gordon.
24121"The Will"UnknownUnknownMarch 22, 1986 (1986-03-22)
"Deja Vu"
"The Prediction"

A millionaire is after a mysterious woman who turned out to be his wife. A psychic (Eva Gabor) makes a very scary prediction. A psychic predicts doom; A woman and an old beau are reunited by her dead husband's design; A man discovers that he was once married. Guest Stars: Eva Gabor as Leila Kane, Mimi Kuzyk as Nancy Brown, Garrett Morris as Gary Samuels, Roxie Roker as Rhonda Whitney, and Patrick Wayne as Jim Stanton / Ed Brown.

Note: Nanci L. Hammond as Jane – Love Boat Mermaid (credited as Nanci Hammond, instead of Nanci Lynn Hammond as in previous episodes).
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22
23
"Spain Cruise: The Matadors"UnknownUnknownMay 3, 1986 (1986-05-03)
"Mrs. Jameson Comes Out"
"Love's Labor Found"
"Marry Me, Marry Me"

Spain cruise: The grandson (Lorenzo Lamas) of a famous matador (Cesar Romero) wants to write rather than become a bullfighter; A woman (Sada Thompson), who spent 20 years in prison, hopes to be reunited with her daughter (Melissa Sue Anderson); A passenger (Adrian Zmed) is seeing both Judy and Vicki without their knowledge; Isaac helps a pregnant unmarried stowaway (Olivia Brown). A matador clashes with his grandson; A released convict seeks her daughter; Isaac finds a stowaway; A man woos two women.

Note: The crew is on vacation in Genoa, Italy, before returning to work and sailing on the Vistafjord around Spain and Portugal. Part 1 includes stops in Barcelona, Ibiza, and Malaga. Part 2 starts in Malaga and includes a stop in Lisbon.

Guest Stars: Melissa Sue Anderson as Dana Colton, Olivia Brown as Lois Hendrix, Mary Crosby as Helen Elaine, Lorenzo Lamas as Antonio Belmonte, William R. Moses as Mark Davis, Cesar Romero as Carlos Belmonte, Sada Thompson as Laura Jameson, and Adrian Zmed as Eddy Conrad.

Other Guests: Mykelti Williamson as James Russell (credited as Mykel T. Williamson) (credit only), Robin Harlan as Beautiful Girl (credit only), Peter Forbes-Robertson as Doctor (credit only), Denise Gallup as Twin #1 (credit only), and Dian Gallup as Twin #2 (credit only). Note: These five Other Guests are credited in Part 1 and Part 2, but only appear in Part 2.

Note: Chiquito de la Calzada appeared as Musician (uncredited) in Part 1 only.

Note: The Love Boat Mermaids did not appear.
24424"My Stepmother, Myself"UnknownUnknownMay 17, 1986 (1986-05-17)
"Almost Roommates"
"Cornerback Sneak"

Captain Stubing's happiness is darkened by Vicki's jealousy. The crew learns that they have to share their cabins. Stubing's pending marriage upsets Vicki; A veteran football player faces being cut; A cook (Michael Winslow) has two roommates. Guest Stars: Marion Ross as Emily Heywood, Geoffrey Scott as John Jackson / John 'Hatchet Man' Hatcher, Trish Van Devere as Amanda Dailey (new owner of the San Jose Friars), Vanessa Williams as Pearl, and Michael Winslow as Spencer Wilson (also introduced as Assistant Cruise Director by Gopher in beginning dialogue).

Other Guests: Sam Scarber as Bubba Powell.

Note: Nanci L. Hammond as Jane – Love Boat Mermaid (credited as Nanci Hammond, instead of Nanci Lynn Hammond as in previous episodes).
24525"Happily Ever After"UnknownUnknownMay 24, 1986 (1986-05-24)
"Have I Got a Job for You"
"Mr. Smith Goes to Minikulu"

The Captain might reconsider his marriage to Emily (Marion Ross). Gopher has second thoughts about an offer to manage an island resort when Isaac leaves the project. Stubing has prenuptial jitters; Ace is prepared to take over as purser if Gopher accepts an offer to manage a tropical resort.

Guest Stars: Clive Revill as Slade Collins, Marion Ross as Emily Heywood / Emily Stubing, Renée Taylor as Monica Douglas and Michael Winslow as Spencer Wilson.

Other Guests: Jan Peters as Minister.

Note: Nanci L. Hammond as Jane – Love Boat Mermaid (credited as Nanci Hammond, instead of Nanci Lynn Hammond as in previous episodes).

Note: This was the series finale. Some special episodes followed, and are sometimes referred to as Season 10, but are not usually included in the series syndication re-runs.

Specials (1986–90)

No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air date
2461"The Shipshape Cruise"UnknownUnknownNovember 21, 1986 (1986-11-21)

An overweight diet doctor hires a fitness instructor to promote her nutrition program; a man tells his significant other that he wants to see other women; Doc runs into an ex (Stephanie Beacham) while he is on his honeymoon.

Ted McGinley is now the ship's yeoman purser, Ashley "Ace" Covington Evans, and Lauren Tewes rejoins the cast as cruise director Julie McCoy.

Guest Stars: Marion Ross as Emily Stubing, Stephanie Beacham as Elaine Riskin, Heidi Bohay as Jerry Sullivan Bricker, Cathy Lee Crosby as Carol Darnell, Katherine Helmond as Harriet Darnell Stevens, Jennifer Holliday as Dr. Charlene Thomas, Steve Lundquist as Steve Riskin, Dack Rambo as Boyd Hughes, and Stephanie Williams as Doris Johnson.

Other Guests: Julius Harris as Minister, and Lana Clarkson as Angela.

Note: Fred Grandy left the show to successfully run for a seat in the United States House of Representatives. Grandy, a Republican representing Iowa's 6th congressional district, went on to serve four consecutive terms (1987–1995).

Pat Klous did not appear in this episode.
2472"The Christmas Cruise – Part 1"UnknownUnknownDecember 25, 1986 (1986-12-25)

Part 1 of 2. Mother and daughter cons work a Christmas cruise; depression overcomes a comic portraying Santa; a couple is reunited after 11 years; the new Mrs. Stubing wonders what to get her husband for Christmas.

Guest Stars: Marion Ross as Emily Stubing, John Byner as Arthur Burkley, Leslie Caron as Mrs. Duvall, Anthony Franciosa as David Morgan, Jennifer Caron Hall as Heather Duvall, Gina Lollobrigida as Carla Lucci, and Peter Scolari as Wellington Davis Rothmeyer.

Other Guests: Judith Barsi as Christmas Angel, Efrain Figueroa as Bartender, Ruben Moreno as Maitre D', Janet Maylie as Maid, Peter Love as Cabin Boy, Cindy Adlesh as Bikini Girl #1, Renee Gentry as Bikini Girl #3, Eva LaRue as Bikini Girl #4, Stacy Lindholm as Bikini Girl #5, Meilani Paul as Bikini Girl #2 (credited as Meilani Figalan), Patty Robinson as Bikini Girl #6 and Lorin Jean Vail as Bikini Girl #7.

Others: Bert Parks as Rich Businessman (uncredited).
2483"The Christmas Cruise – Part 2"UnknownUnknownDecember 25, 1986 (1986-12-25)

Conclusion. Heather wonders if Wellington will still love her when he finds out about her; a chance meeting between David and the morose Santa helps them both make a fateful decision; Mrs. Stubing struggles to find a present for Merrill.

Guest Stars/Other Guests: Same as Part 1.
2494"Who Killed Maxwell Thorn?"UnknownUnknownFebruary 27, 1987 (1987-02-27)

A billionaire who had secretly given free cruises to six strangers is reported missing, and Ace suspects that one of the cruise recipients murdered him; Emily (Marion Ross) searches for fulfillment as someone other than the captain's wife.

Guest Stars: Marion Ross as Emily Stubing, Lloyd Bochner as George Tillman, Arlene Dahl as Jessica York, Peter Graves as Leonard Culver, Julie Harris as Irene Culver, Jenilee Harrison as Sarah York, Roger E. Mosley as Jeffrey T. Gilbert, John Rubinstein as Allan Davis, Connie Stevens as Margret Grant, Alan Thicke as Robert McBride, Jayne Meadows as Jayne Meadows (credited as Jayne Meadows Allen), Steve Allen as Steve Allen, Army Archerd as himself, Selma Archerd as Selma Archerd, Barbi Benton as Barbi Benton, Milton Berle as himself, Barbara Billingsley as June Cleaver, Tom Bosley as Howard Pfister, Ruth Buzzi as Ruth Buzzi, Carol Channing as Tante Sylvia, Charo as April Lopez, Bert Convy as Bert Convy (credited as Bert Convey), Elinor Donahue as Betty Anderson, Tony Dow as Wally Cleaver, Florence Henderson as Carol Brady, Gordon Jump as Maître d, Don Knotts as Don Knotts, Judy Landers as Judy Landers, Tina Louise as Tina Louise, Patti MacLeod as Patti MacLeod, Robert Mandan Robert Mandan, Jerry Mathers as Beaver Cleaver, Christopher Norris as herself, Louis Nye as Louis Nye, Tom Poston as Tom Poston, Juliet Prowse as Juliet Prowse, Robert Reed as Mike Brady, Charles Siebert as Dr. Stanley Riverside, Gale Storm as Gale Storm, Vic Tayback as Vic Tayback, Charlene Tilton as Secretary, Leslie Uggams as Leslie Uggams, Jo Anne Worley as Jo Anne Worley, and Jane Wyatt as Margaret Anderson.

Others: David Doyle as Repairer #1 and Arte Johnson as Repairer #2.
2505"The Love Boat: A Valentine Voyage"UnknownUnknownFebruary 12, 1990 (1990-02-12)

A Valentine's Day episode, centered on a suspended police lieutenant trailing a group of jewel thieves and Captain Stubing and Vicki mourning Emily's sudden death and eventually returning to Barbados (where the Stubings honeymooned) to find closure. Also: The new cruise director sets her eyes on a passenger who is a TV star, but another ship employee is interested in her. Doc has to care for the pregnant wife of the ship's chief executive.

Guest Stars: Steve Bond as Kirk, Tom Bosley as Lt. Logan, Julia Duffy as Myrna Foley, Roddy Piper as Maurice Steiger, Shanna Reed as Nina Morgan, Joe Regalbuto as Tony Blanchard, Ted Shackelford as Paul Royce, Kim Johnston Ulrich as Kelly

Home media

The following DVD sets were released by CBS Home Entertainment: [3]

DVD setEpisodesRelease date
The Love Boat: Season 1, Volume 112March 4, 2008
The Love Boat: Season 1, Volume 212August 12, 2008
The Love Boat: Season 2, Volume 113January 27, 2009
The Love Boat: Season 2, Volume 212August 4, 2009
The Love Boat: Season 3, Volume 114January 17, 2017
The Love Boat: Season 3, Volume 214January 17, 2017

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References

  1. Aired on Friday instead of Saturday, http://www.ultimate70s.com/seventies_history/19781117/television
  2. "Special Collector's Issue: 100 Greatest Episodes of All Time". TV Guide (June 28 – July 4). 1997.
  3. DVD release info Archived 2012-05-20 at the Wayback Machine at TVShowsOnDVD.com