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BDSM is a variety of often erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other related interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves to be practising BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture often is said to depend on self-identification and shared experience.
Human sexual activity, human sexual practice or human sexual behaviour is the manner in which humans experience and express their sexuality. People engage in a variety of sexual acts, ranging from activities done alone to acts with another person in varying patterns of frequency, for a wide variety of reasons. Sexual activity usually results in sexual arousal and physiological changes in the aroused person, some of which are pronounced while others are more subtle. Sexual activity may also include conduct and activities which are intended to arouse the sexual interest of another or enhance the sex life of another, such as strategies to find or attract partners, or personal interactions between individuals. Sexual activity may follow sexual arousal.
The fundamental principles for the exercise of BDSM require that it be performed with the informed consent of all parties. Since the 1980s, many practitioners and organizations have adopted the motto safe, sane and consensual, commonly abbreviated SSC, which means that everything is based on safe activities, that all participants are of sufficiently sound mind in their conduct, and that all participants do consent. It is mutual consent that makes a clear legal and ethical distinction between BDSM and such crimes as sexual assault and domestic violence.
Bondage, in the BDSM subculture, is the practice of consensually tying, binding, or restraining a partner for erotic, aesthetic, or somatosensory stimulation. A partner may be physically restrained in a variety of ways, including the use of rope, cuffs, bondage tape, or self-adhering bandage.
In BDSM culture, a play party is a social event in which attendees socialize with like-minded people and engage in BDSM activities. Generally there is an area for drinking and socializing, an area for changing into more appropriate attire, and an area for "play" or sexually arousing activities.
Risk-aware consensual kink is an acronym used by some of the BDSM community to describe a philosophical view that is generally permissive of certain risky sexual behaviors, as long as the participants are fully aware of the risks. This is often viewed in contrast to safe, sane, and consensual which generally holds that only activities that are considered safe, sane, and consensual are permitted.
Sadism and masochism, known collectively as sadomasochism, are the derivation of pleasure from acts of respectively inflicting or receiving pain or humiliation. Practitioners of sadomasochism may seek sexual pleasure from their acts. While the terms sadist and masochist refer respectively to one who enjoys giving and receiving pain, some practitioners of sadomasochism may switch between activity and passivity.
Discipline in BDSM is the practice in which the dominant sets rules which the submissive is expected to obey. When rules of expected behaviour are broken, punishment is often used as a means of disciplining.
This glossary of BDSM terms defines terms commonly used in the BDSM community.
Dominance and submission (D/s) is a set of behaviors, customs, and rituals involving the submission of one person to another in an erotic episode or lifestyle. It is a subset of BDSM. This form of sexual contact and pleasure has been shown to please a minority of people.
A dungeon monitor, sometimes referred to as a dungeon master or simply DM, is a person charged with supervising a playspace at BDSM events such as play parties and fetish clubs. A dungeon monitor may be of any sex or gender, and may normally identify as any role. On duty, their authority is absolute. If a Dungeon Monitor orders a play scene to stop, it must be stopped immediately. Dungeon Monitors are usually people with significant experience and/or explicit education in BDSM and safer sex practices, and who also have verifiable training both in BDSM safety practices and first aid techniques. They often wear a special uniform, hat or armband, but there is no standard for determining who is a Dungeon Monitor.
Erotic humiliation is a consensual psychological humiliation performed in order to produce erotic excitement or sexual arousal. This can be for either the person(s) being humiliated and demeaned or the person(s) humiliating, or both. It is sometimes performed before spectators, including through pornography and webcam modeling. It may be part of BDSM and other sexual roleplay, or accompanied by the sexual stimulation of the genitals of one or both parties in the activity.
Play, within BDSM circles, is any of the wide variety of "kinky" activities. This includes both physical and mental activities, covering a wide range of intensities and levels of social acceptability. The term originated in the BDSM club and party communities, indicating the activities taking place within a scene. It has since extended to the full range of BDSM activities.
In BDSM, limits refer to issues that participants in a play scene or dynamic feel strongly about, usually referring to prohibited activities. Participants typically negotiate an outline of what activities will and will not take place. The participants describe what they desire, do not desire, will and will not tolerate, including the determination of limits. For example, it is common to set a safeword and to establish certain types of play as prohibited.
Consent within BDSM is when a participant gives their permission for certain acts or types of relationships. It bears much in common with the concept of informed consent and is simultaneously a personal, ethical and social issue. It is an issue that attracts much attention within BDSM, resulting in competing models of consent such as safe, sane and consensual and risk-aware consensual kink. Observers from outside the BDSM community have also commented on the issue of consent in BDSM, sometimes referring to legal consent which is a separate and largely unrelated matter. However, the presence of explicit consent within BDSM can often have implications for BDSM and the law and, depending on the country the participants are in, may make the differences between being prosecuted or not.
Animal roleplay is a form of roleplay where at least one participant plays the part of a non-human animal. As with most forms of roleplay, its uses include play and psychodrama.
In BDSM, Master/slave, M/s or sexual slavery is a relationship in which one individual serves another in a consensual authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures. The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term "slave" because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave's body, as property or chattel. While male "masters" will usually be referred to as "Master", whether or not female Masters are referred to as "Master" or "Mistress" may depend upon whether they identify as following the leather subculture or BDSM path, or simply preference.
Sexual consent is consent to engage in sexual activity. In many jurisdictions, sexual activity without consent is considered rape or other sexual assault.
Criminalization of consensual BDSM practices is usually not with explicit reference to BDSM, but results from the fact that such behavior as spanking or cuffing someone could be considered a breach of personal rights, which in principle constitutes a criminal offense. In Germany, Netherlands, Japan and Scandinavia, such behavior is legal in principle. In Austria the legal status is not clear, while in Switzerland some BDSM practices can be considered criminal.
Hurt Me Plenty is a 2014 video game by independent developer Robert Yang. Described as a "short educational game" by its creator, Hurt Me Plenty simulates a BDSM interaction where players negotiate and perform spanking on a virtual partner, with the player required to respect the boundaries agreed with the partner to replay the game. Upon release, Hurt Me Plenty received positive reviews, with praise directed to the game's tender and mutual representation of sex and communication, noting the game's potential use as a medium for education about consent and boundaries. In 2016, Yang released a revised and updated version of Hurt Me Plenty as part of Radiator 2, a compilation of his previous games.
References
- ↑ "Beyond Safe Words: When Saying 'No' in BDSM Isn't Enough". Broadly. 10 December 2015. Archived from the original on 30 May 2016. Retrieved 22 April 2016.
- ↑ Clark, Tracy (29 January 2012). "When safe words are ignored". Salon.com . Archived from the original on 27 April 2013. Retrieved 29 April 2013.
- ↑ Gilmour, Paisley (17 September 2018). "Everything you need to know about using safewords". Cosmopolitan. Retrieved 28 December 2020.
- ↑ Bauer, R. (28 October 2014). Queer BDSM Intimacies: Critical Consent and Pushing Boundaries. Springer. ISBN 9781137435026. Archived from the original on 23 November 2016. Retrieved 22 November 2016– via Google Books.
- ↑ David J. Ley (2 February 2021). "Consensual Non-Consent: Exploring Challenging Boundaries". Psychology Today. Retrieved 3 January 2023.
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