BDSM is a variety of often erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other related interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves to be practising BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture often is said to depend on self-identification and shared experience.
A dominatrix, or domme, is a woman who takes the dominant role in BDSM activities. A dominatrix can be of any sexual orientation, but this does not necessarily limit the genders of her submissive partners. Dominatrices are popularly known for inflicting physical pain on their submissive subjects, but this is not done in every case. In some instances erotic humiliation is used, such as verbal humiliation or the assignment of humiliating tasks. Dominatrices also make use of other forms of servitude. Practices of domination common to many BDSM and other various sexual relationships are also prevalent. A dominatrix is typically a paid professional (pro-domme) as the term dominatrix is little-used within the non-professional BDSM scene.
Human sexual activity, human sexual practice or human sexual behaviour is the manner in which humans experience and express their sexuality. People engage in a variety of sexual acts, ranging from activities done alone to acts with another person in varying patterns of frequency, for a wide variety of reasons. Sexual activity usually results in sexual arousal and physiological changes in the aroused person, some of which are pronounced while others are more subtle. Sexual activity may also include conduct and activities which are intended to arouse the sexual interest of another or enhance the sex life of another, such as strategies to find or attract partners, or personal interactions between individuals. Sexual activity may follow sexual arousal.
In BDSM, a safeword is a code word, series of code words or other signal used by a person to communicate their physical or emotional state, typically when approaching, or crossing, a physical, emotional, or moral boundary. Some safewords are used to stop the scene outright, while others can communicate a willingness to continue, but at a reduced level of intensity.
Bondage, in the BDSM subculture, is the practice of consensually tying, binding, or restraining a partner for erotic, aesthetic, or somatosensory stimulation. A partner may be physically restrained in a variety of ways, including the use of rope, cuffs, bondage tape, or self-adhering bandage.
Sexual roleplay is roleplay that has a strong erotic element. It may involve two or more people who act out roles in order to bring to life a sexual fantasy and may be a form of foreplay and be sexually arousing. Many people regard sexual roleplay as a means of overcoming sexual inhibitions. It may take place in the real world, or via an internet forum, chat-room, video-game, or email—allowing for physically or virtually impossible erotic interests to be enacted.
Male dominance, or maledom is a BDSM practice where the dominant partner is male. A sexually dominant male in BDSM practices is also known as a maledom. Maledoms can be professional as well as non-professional. The term ProDom is used for a professional male dominant who earns money by working as a professional dominant as part of the sex industry. A maledom who role-plays a paternal figure is also known as Daddy Dom.
Female submission or femsub is an activity or relationship in which a woman submits to the direction of a sexual partner or has her body used sexually by or for the sexual pleasure of her partner. The expression is often associated with BDSM, where submission to such activity is usually voluntarily and consensual. Submission usually involves a degree of trust by the woman in her partner. The dominant partner is usually a man, but can also be another woman, or there can be multiple dominant partners simultaneously. The submissive woman may derive sexual pleasure or emotional gratification from relinquishing control to a trusted dominant partner.
Discipline in BDSM is the practice in which the dominant sets rules which the submissive is expected to obey. When rules of expected behaviour are broken, punishment is often used as a means of disciplining.
BDSM is a variety of erotic practices involving dominance and submission, roleplaying, restraint, and other interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves as practicing BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture is usually dependent on self-identification and shared experience. Interest in BDSM can range from one-time experimentation to a lifestyle.
Erotic sexual denial is a popular form of sexual activity whereby sexual gratification for one or both partners is delayed or "denied" sexual experiences in order to increase erotic arousal and/or tension. It is commonly used as sex play within the context of a mild dominance and submission relationship, though it can also be a solo practice. When used in the context of dominance and submission, the dominant partner is often encouraged to prioritize their own sexual pleasure over that of their submissive partner. The submissive partner receives gratification from providing sexual pleasure to their partner and from the feelings of vulnerability and tension that come from having their own sexual pleasure controlled by another. The prohibited sexual experience can be narrowly or broadly defined for a specific or indeterminate length of time, depending on the practitioner. The experience withheld can be any favored or desired sexual activities, such as specific acts or positions, provided it is something the practitioner wants.
Cock and ball torture (CBT) is a sexual activity involving the application of pain or constriction to the male genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as genital piercing, wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball-busting, genital flogging, urethral play, tickle torture, erotic electrostimulation, kneeing or kicking. The recipient of such activities may receive direct physical pleasure via masochism, or emotional pleasure through erotic humiliation, or knowledge that the play is pleasing to a sadistic dominant. Many of these practices carry significant health risks.
Edging, sometimes also referred to as gooning or surfing, is a sexual technique whereby an orgasm is controlled. It is practiced alone or with a partner and involves the maintenance of a high level of sexual arousal for an extended period without reaching climax. Orgasm control involves either sex partner being in control of the other partner's orgasm, or a person delaying their own orgasm during sexual activity with a partner or through masturbation. Any method of sexual stimulation can be used to experience controlled orgasm.
This glossary of BDSM terms defines terms commonly used in the BDSM community.
Dominance and submission (D/s) is a set of behaviors, customs, and rituals involving the submission of one person to another in an erotic episode or lifestyle. It is a subset of BDSM. This form of sexual contact and pleasure has been shown to please a minority of people.
Erotic humiliation or sexual humiliation is a consensual psychological humiliation performed in order to produce erotic excitement or sexual arousal. This can be for either the person(s) being humiliated and demeaned or the person(s) humiliating, or both. It is sometimes performed before spectators, including through pornography and webcam modeling. It may be part of BDSM and other sexual roleplay, or accompanied by the sexual stimulation of the genitals of one or both parties in the activity.
In BDSM, limits refer to issues that participants in a play scene or dynamic feel strongly about, usually referring to prohibited activities. Participants typically negotiate an outline of what activities will and will not take place. The participants describe what they desire, do not desire, will and will not tolerate, including the determination of limits. For example, it is common to set a safeword and to establish certain types of play as prohibited.
Animal roleplay is a form of roleplay where at least one participant plays the part of a non-human animal. As with most forms of roleplay, its uses include play and psychodrama.
In BDSM, Master/slave, M/s or sexual slavery is a relationship in which one individual serves another in a consensual authority-exchange structured relationship. Unlike Dominant/submissive structures found in BDSM in which love is often the core value, service and obedience are often the core values in Master/slave structures. The participants may be of any gender or sexual orientation. The relationship uses the term "slave" because of the association of the term with ownership rights of a master to their slave's body, as property or chattel. While male "masters" will usually be referred to as "Master", whether or not female Masters are referred to as "Master" or "Mistress" may depend upon whether they identify as following the leather subculture or BDSM path, or simply preference.
The terms top, bottom, and switch are used to describe roles during a sexual act, or they may more broadly denote a psychological, social, or sexual identity, or indicate one's usual preference. The terms top, bottom, and switch are also used in BDSM, with slightly different meanings. In BDSM, a top is the person doing something to someone else, and a bottom is the person receiving that act. In both contexts, the terms top and bottom refer to active and passive roles, not to who is physically on top in a particular sexual act. A switch is someone who can act as both a top and bottom. The older term versatile is sometimes used instead of switch.
