BDSM is a variety of often erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other related interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves to be practising BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture often is said to depend on self-identification and shared experience.
Conventional sex, colloquially known as vanilla sex, is sexual behavior that is within the range of normality for a culture or subculture, and typically involves sex which does not include elements of BDSM, kink, fetishism, and/or happens within a marriage or relationship.
In BDSM culture, a play party is a social event in which attendees socialize with like-minded people and engage in BDSM activities. Generally there is an area for drinking and socializing, an area for changing into more appropriate attire, and an area for "play" or sexually arousing activities.
Leather subculture denotes practices and styles of dress organized around sexual activities that involve leather garments, such as leather jackets, vests, boots, chaps, harnesses, or other items. Wearing leather garments is one way that participants in this culture self-consciously distinguish themselves from mainstream sexual cultures. Many participants associate leather culture with BDSM practices and its many subcultures. For some, black leather clothing is an erotic fashion that expresses heightened masculinity or the appropriation of sexual power; love of motorcycles, motorcycle clubs and independence; and/or engagement in sexual kink or leather fetishism.
The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF) is an American sex-positive advocacy and educational organization founded in 1997. NCSF has over one hundred coalition partners, and over sixty supporting members. NCSF advocates on behalf of adults involved in alternative lifestyles with respect to sexuality and relationship composition, specifically for tolerance and non-discrimination of those so identified, as well as education for adults involved in such lifestyles. The organization's main office is in Baltimore, Maryland.
Erotic sexual denial is a popular form of sexual activity whereby sexual gratification for one or both partners is delayed or "denied" sexual experiences in order to increase erotic arousal and/or tension. It is commonly used as sex play within the context of a mild dominance and submission relationship, though it can also be a solo practice. When used in the context of dominance and submission, the dominant partner is often encouraged to prioritize their own sexual pleasure over that of their submissive partner. The submissive partner receives gratification from providing sexual pleasure to their partner and from the feelings of vulnerability and tension that come from having their own sexual pleasure controlled by another. The prohibited sexual experience can be narrowly or broadly defined for a specific or indeterminate length of time, depending on the practitioner. The experience withheld can be any favored or desired sexual activities, such as specific acts or positions, provided it is something the practitioner wants.
Gloria Brame is an American sexologist, writer and sex therapist based in Athens, Georgia. She is a member of the American College of Sexologists, and clinical sexologist. Her sex therapy practice specializes in consensual BDSM, sexual fetishism and sexual dysfunction.
This glossary of BDSM defines terms commonly used in the BDSM community.
Cuffs is a student group at Iowa State University that was formed in 2000 to discuss issues related to bondage, discipline, domination and sadomasochism.
In human sexuality, kinkiness is the use of sexual practices, concepts or fantasies that are not conventional. The term derives from the idea of a "bend" in one's sexual behaviour, to contrast such behaviour with "straight" or "vanilla" sexual mores and proclivities. It is thus a colloquial term for non-normative sexual behaviour. The term "kink" has been claimed by some who practice sexual fetishism as a term or synonym for their practices, indicating a range of sexual and sexualistic practices from playful to sexual objectification and certain paraphilias. In the 21st century the term "kink", along with expressions like BDSM, leather and fetish, has become more commonly used than the term paraphilia. Some universities also feature student organizations focused on kinks, within the context of wider LGBTQ concerns.
Conversio Virium (CV), one of the oldest university student-run BDSM education groups in the United States, is the central Columbia University student organization that represents the college's collective population who engage in consensual BDSM and related activities. CV is a not-for-profit group that advocates strongly for freedom of sexual self-expression and is particularly concerned with creating a safe and welcoming environment for young people to explore their interest in alternative sexual practices, especially consensual sexual dominance and submission (D/s). CV participates in many of New York City's sexuality community events alongside similar organizations such as The Eulenspiegel Society.
Feminization or feminisation, sometimes forced feminization, and also known as sissification, is a practice in dominance and submission or kink subcultures, involving reversal of gender roles and making a submissive male take on a feminine role, which includes cross-dressing. Subsets of the practice include "sissy training" and variations thereof, where the submissive male is "trained" to become feminine.
Breast torture is a BDSM activity in which sexual stimulation is provided through the intentional application of physical pain or constriction to the breasts, areolae or nipples of a submissive. It is a popular activity among the kink community. The recipient of such activities may wish to receive them as a result of masochism or they may have a desire to please a dominant who is sadistic. Those involved may also be motivated by breast fetishism. Mild breast torture such as light impact play on the breasts is also occasionally used outside of the BDSM context to provide stimulation and pleasure during conventional sex.
Peter Thomas Acworth is a British web entrepreneur based in San Francisco. He founded Kink.com, an internet pornography producer that focuses on BDSM and fetish themes. According to the San Francisco Bay Guardian, Acworth's work has been guided by "Kink's principles of intimate, conversational, playful, and mutually enjoyable interactions", and he has expressed the belief that "a product line should come from an individual's actual fantasies."
FetLife is a social networking website that serves people interested in BDSM, fetishism, and kink. It distinguishes itself from competitors by emphasizing itself as a social network rather than a dating site.
Kink.com is an independent San Francisco–based bondage internet pornography company that runs a group of websites devoted to BDSM and related fetishes. Kink.com, along with Kink Studios, LLC, Hogtied.com and Behindkink.com are DBAs for Cybernet Entertainment LLC, the parent company that operates the studio.
Madison Young is an American filmmaker, author, performance artist, feminist activist, and former adult film performer and award-winning erotic filmmaker. Young is a prominent figure in the feminist porn movement and is known for their work as a queer and kink-focused educator and an advocate of sex workers' rights.
Kink is a 2013 American documentary film directed by Christina Voros and produced by James Franco about the BDSM website Kink.com. The film was originally released in January 2013 and had a staggered release worldwide in 2013 and 2015.
Lord Morpheous is a Canadian sex educator, author and photographer based in New York. He is the author of How to Be Kinky: A Beginner’s Guide to BDSM, How to Be Kinkier: More Adventures in Adult Playtime and Bondage Basics: Naughty Knots and Risque Restraints You Need to Know. Morpheous' work is archived in the Sexual Representation Collection of the University of Toronto's Mark S. Bonham Centre for Sexual Diversity Studies, at the Leather Archives and Museum in Chicago, and at the National Archives of Canada. Morpheous has taught a variety of workshops on rope bondage, the aesthetics of bondage, fetish photography, advanced and beginner BDSM, and workshops catered to professional dominants and submissives. He is also the founder of Morpheous’ Bondage Extravaganza, an annual rope bondage themed art installation.
Cynthia Slater was an American sex educator, HIV/AIDS activist, and dominatrix. She was the co-founder of the second BDSM organization founded in the United States, a San Francisco, California based BDSM education and support group known as the Society of Janus, which she founded with Larry Olsen in August 1974.
