True self and false self

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The true self (also known as real self, authentic self, original self and vulnerable self) and the false self (also known as fake self, idealized self, superficial self and pseudo self) are a psychological dualism conceptualized by English psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott. [1] Winnicott used "true self" to denote a sense of self based on spontaneous authentic experience and a feeling of being alive, having a real self with little to no contradiction. [2] "False self", by contrast, denotes a sense of self created as a defensive facade, [1] which in extreme cases can leave an individual lacking spontaneity and feeling dead and empty behind an inconsistent and incompetent appearance of being real, such as in narcissism. [1]

Contents

Characteristics

In his work, Winnicott saw the "true self" as stemming from self-perception in early infancy, such as awareness of tangible aspects of being alive, like blood pumping through veins and lungs inflating and deflating with breathing—what Winnicott called simply being. [3] Out of this, an infant begins to guarantee that these elements are constant, and regards its life as an essential reality. After birth, the baby's spontaneous, nonverbal gestures derive from that instinctual sense, [1] and if responded to kindly and with affirmation by the parents, become the basis for the continuing development of the true self.

However, when what Winnicott was careful to describe as good enough parenting—i.e., not necessarily perfect [4] —was not in place, the infant's spontaneity was in danger of being encroached on by the need for compliance with the parents' wishes/expectations. [5] The result could be the creation of what Winnicott called the "false self", where "other people's expectations can become of overriding importance, overlaying or contradicting the original sense of self, the one connected to the very roots of one's being". [6] The danger he saw was that "through this false self, the infant builds up a false set of relationships, and by means of introjections even attains a show of being real", [7] while, in fact, merely concealing a barren emptiness behind an independent-seeming façade. [8]

The danger was particularly acute where the baby had to provide attunement for the mother/parents, rather than vice versa, building up a sort of dissociated recognition of the object on an impersonal, not personal and spontaneous basis. [9] But while such a pathological false self stifled the spontaneous gestures of the true self in favour of a lifeless imitation, Winnicott nevertheless considered it of vital importance in preventing something worse: the annihilating experience of the exploitation of the hidden true self itself. [3]

Precursors

Helene Deutsch, a colleague of Freud, had previously described "as if" personalities, pseudo-relationships substituting for real ones. [10] Winnicott's analyst, Joan Riviere, had also explored the concept of the narcissist's masquerade, which is essentially a superficial assent concealing a subtle hidden struggle for control. [11] Freud's own late theory of the ego as the product of identifications [12] came close to viewing it only as a false self; [13] while Winnicott's true/false distinction has also been compared to Michael Balint's "basic fault" and to Ronald Fairbairn's notion of the "compromised ego". [14]

Erich Fromm, in his 1941 book The Fear of Freedom distinguished between original self and pseudo self—the inauthenticality of the latter being a way to escape the loneliness of freedom; [15] while much earlier existentialists such as Søren Kierkegaard had claimed that "to will to be that self which one truly is, is indeed the opposite of despair"—the despair of choosing "to be another than himself". [16]

Karen Horney, in her 1950 book, Neurosis and Human Growth , based her idea of "true self" and "false self" through the view of self-improvement, interpreting it as real self and ideal self, with the real self being what one currently is and the ideal self being what one could become. [17] (See also Karen Horney § Theory of the self).

Later developments

The second half of the twentieth century saw Winnicott's ideas extended and applied in a variety of contexts, both in psychoanalysis and beyond.

Kohut

Kohut extended Winnicott's work in his investigation of narcissism, [18] seeing narcissists as evolving a defensive armor around their damaged inner selves. [19] He considered it less pathological to identify with the damaged remnants of the self, than to achieve coherence through identification with an external personality at the cost of one's own autonomous creativity. [20]

Lowen

Alexander Lowen identified narcissists as having a true and a false, or superficial, self. The false self rests on the surface, as the self presented to the world. It stands in contrast to the true self, which resides behind the facade or image. This true self is the feeling self, but for the narcissist the feeling self must be hidden and denied. Since the superficial self represents submission and conformity, the inner or true self is rebellious and angry. This underlying rebellion and anger can never be fully suppressed since it is an expression of the life force in that person. But because of the denial, it cannot be expressed directly. Instead it shows up in the narcissist's acting out. And it can become a perverse force. [21]

Masterson

James F. Masterson argued that all the personality disorders crucially involve the conflict between a person's two selves: the false self, which the very young child constructs to please the mother, and the true self. The psychotherapy of personality disorders is an attempt to put people back in touch with their real selves. [22]

Symington

Symington developed Winnicott's contrast between true and false self to cover the sources of personal action, contrasting an autonomous and a discordant source of action – the latter drawn from the internalisation of external influences and pressures. [23] Thus for example parental dreams of self-glorification by way of their child's achievements can be internalised as an alien discordant source of action. [24] Symington stressed however the intentional element in the individual's abandoning the autonomous self in favour of a false self or narcissistic mask – something he considered Winnicott to have overlooked. [25]

Vaknin

As part of what has been described as a personal mission to raise the profile of the condition, [26] psychology professor (and self-confessed narcissist) Sam Vaknin has highlighted the role of the false self in narcissism. The false self replaces the narcissist's true self and is intended to shield him from hurt and narcissistic injury by self-imputing omnipotence. The narcissist pretends that his false self is real and demands that others affirm this confabulation, meanwhile keeping his real imperfect true self under wraps. [27]

For Vaknin, the false self is by far more important to the narcissist than his dilapidated, dysfunctional true self; and he does not subscribe to the view that the true self can be resuscitated through therapy. [28]

Miller

Alice Miller cautiously warns that a child/patient may not have any formed true self, waiting behind the false self facade; [29] and that as a result freeing the true self is not as simple as the Winnicottian image of the butterfly emerging from its cocoon. [30] If a true self can be developed, however, she considered that the empty grandiosity of the false self could give way to a new sense of autonomous vitality. [31]

Orbach: false bodies

Susie Orbach saw the false self as an overdevelopment (under parental pressure) of certain aspects of the self at the expense of other aspects – of the full potential of the self – producing thereby an abiding distrust of what emerges spontaneously from the individual himself or herself. [32] Orbach went on to extend Winnicott's account of how environmental failure can lead to an inner splitting of mind and body, [33] so as to cover the idea of the false body – falsified sense of one's own body. [34] Orbach saw the female false body in particular as built upon identifications with others, at the cost of an inner sense of authenticity and reliability. [35] Breaking up a monolithic but false body-sense in the process of therapy could allow for the emergence of a range of authentic (even if often painful) body feelings in the patient. [36]

Jungian persona

Jungians have explored the overlap between Jung's concept of the persona and Winnicott's false self; [37] but, while noting similarities, consider that only the most rigidly defensive persona approximates to the pathological status of the false self. [38]

Stern's tripartite self

Daniel Stern considered Winnicott's sense of "going on being" as constitutive of the core, pre-verbal self. [39] He also explored how language could be used to reinforce a false sense of self, leaving the true self linguistically opaque and disavowed. [40] He ended, however, by proposing a three-fold division of social, private, and of disavowed self. [41]

Richard Rohr

Richard Rohr explores the spiritual dimensions of the concept of True self and False self in his book Immortal Diamond.

Criticisms

Neville Symington criticised Winnicott for failing to integrate his false self insight with the theory of ego and id. [42] Similarly, continental analysts like Jean-Bertrand Pontalis have made use of true/false self as a clinical distinction, while having reservations about its theoretical status. [43]

The philosopher Michel Foucault took issue more broadly with the concept of a true self on the anti-essentialist grounds that the self was a construct – something one had to evolve through a process of subjectification, an aesthetics of self-formation, not something simply waiting to be uncovered: [44] "we have to create ourselves as a work of art". [45]

Literary examples

See also

Related Research Articles

The psychology of self is the study of either the cognitive, conative or affective representation of one's identity, or the subject of experience. The earliest form of the Self in modern psychology saw the emergence of two elements, I and me, with I referring to the Self as the subjective knower and me referring to the Self as a subject that is known.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Donald Winnicott</span> English pediatrician and psychoanalyst

Donald Woods Winnicott was an English paediatrician and psychoanalyst who was especially influential in the field of object relations theory and developmental psychology. He was a leading member of the British Independent Group of the British Psychoanalytical Society, President of the British Psychoanalytical Society twice, and a close associate of British writer and psychoanalyst Marion Milner.

Object relations theory is a school of thought in psychoanalytic theory and psychoanalysis centered around theories of stages of ego development. Its concerns include the relation of the psyche to others in childhood and the exploration of relationships between external people, as well as internal images and the relations found in them. Adherents to this school of thought maintain that the infant's relationship with the mother primarily determines the formation of their personality in adult life. Attachment is the bedrock of the development of the self, i.e. the psychic organization that creates one's sense of identity.

Self psychology, a modern psychoanalytic theory and its clinical applications, was conceived by Heinz Kohut in Chicago in the 1960s, 70s, and 80s, and is still developing as a contemporary form of psychoanalytic treatment. In self psychology, the effort is made to understand individuals from within their subjective experience via vicarious introspection, basing interpretations on the understanding of the self as the central agency of the human psyche. Essential to understanding self psychology are the concepts of empathy, selfobject, mirroring, idealising, alter ego/twinship and the tripolar self. Though self psychology also recognizes certain drives, conflicts, and complexes present in Freudian psychodynamic theory, these are understood within a different framework. Self psychology was seen as a major break from traditional psychoanalysis and is considered the beginnings of the relational approach to psychoanalysis.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Narcissism</span> Excessive preoccupation with oneself

Narcissism is a self-centered personality style characterized as having an excessive preoccupation with oneself and one's own needs, often at the expense of others. Narcissism, rooted in Greek mythology, has evolved into a psychological concept studied extensively since the early 20th century, highlighting its relevance across various societal domains.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Ego ideal</span> Freudian concept

In Freudian psychoanalysis, the ego ideal is the inner image of oneself as one wants to become. It consists of "the individual's conscious and unconscious images of what he would like to be, patterned after certain people whom ... he regards as ideal."

In psychology, narcissistic injury, also known as narcissistic wound or wounded ego, is emotional trauma that overwhelms an individual's defense mechanisms and devastates their pride and self-worth. In some cases, the shame or disgrace is so significant that the individual can never again truly feel good about who they are. This is sometimes referred to as a "narcissistic scar".

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Susie Orbach</span> British psychotherapist and author

Susie Orbach is a British psychotherapist, psychoanalyst, writer and social critic. Her first book, Fat is a Feminist Issue, analysed the psychology of dieting and over-eating in women, and she has campaigned against media pressure on girls to feel dissatisfied with their physical appearance. She was married to the author Jeanette Winterson. She is honoured in BBC'S 100 Women in 2013 and 2014. She was the therapist to Diana, Princess of Wales during the 1990s.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Karen Horney</span> German psychoanalyst (1885–1952)

Karen Horney was a German psychoanalyst who practiced in the United States during her later career. Her theories questioned some traditional Freudian views. This was particularly true of her theories of sexuality and of the instinct orientation of psychoanalysis. She is credited with founding feminist psychology in response to Freud's theory of penis envy. She disagreed with Freud about inherent differences in the psychology of men and women, and like Adler, she traced such differences to society and culture rather than biology.

The concept of excessive selfishness has been recognized throughout history. The term "narcissism" is derived from the Greek mythology of Narcissus, but was only coined at the close of the nineteenth century.

Healthy narcissism is a positive sense of self that is in alignment with the greater good. The concept of healthy narcissism was first coined by Paul Federn and gained prominence in the 1970s through the research of Heinz Kohut and Otto Kernberg. It developed slowly out of the psychoanalytic tradition, and became popular in the late twentieth century.

Self-realization is a term used in Western philosophy, psychology, and spirituality; and in Indian religions. In the Western understanding, it is the "fulfillment by oneself of the possibilities of one's character or personality". In Jainism, self realization is called Samyak darshan in which a person attains extrasensory and thoughtless blissful experience of the soul. In the Hindu understanding, self-realization is liberating knowledge of the true self, either as the permanent undying Purusha or witness-consciousness, which is atman (essence), or as the absence (sunyata) of such a permanent self.

<span class="mw-page-title-main">Sam Vaknin</span> Israeli writer of fiction and non-fiction, also on narcissistic personality disorder

Shmuel "Sam" Vaknin is an Israeli writer and professor of psychology. He is the author of Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited (1999), was the last editor-in-chief of the now-defunct political news website Global Politician, and runs a private website about narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).

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Narcissistic leadership is a leadership style in which the leader is only interested in themself. Their priority is themself – at the expense of their people/group members. This leader exhibits the characteristics of a narcissist: arrogance, dominance and hostility. It is a sufficiently common leadership style that it has acquired its own name. Narcissism is most often described as unhealthy and destructive. It has been described as "driven by unyielding arrogance, self-absorption, and a personal egotistic need for power and admiration".

Neville Symington was a member of the Middle Group of British Psychoanalysts which argues that the primary motivation of the child is object-seeking rather than drive gratification. He published a number of books on psychoanalytic topics, and was President of the Australian Psychoanalytical Society from 1999 to 2002.

In psychology, narcissistic withdrawal is a stage in narcissism and a narcissistic defense characterized by "turning away from parental figures, and by the fantasy that essential needs can be satisfied by the individual alone". In adulthood, it is more likely to be an ego defense with repressed origins. Individuals feel obliged to withdraw from any relationship that threatens to be more than short-term, avoiding the risk of narcissistic injury, and will instead retreat into a comfort zone. The idea was first described by Melanie Klein in her psychoanalytic research on stages of narcissism in children.

Narcissistic defenses are those processes whereby the idealized aspects of the self are preserved, and its limitations denied. They tend to be rigid and totalistic. They are often driven by feelings of shame and guilt, conscious or unconscious.

Narcissistic elation or narcissistic coenaesthetic expansion were terms used by Hungarian psychoanalyst Béla Grunberger to highlight 'the narcissistic situation of the primal self in narcissistic union with the mother'.

Narcissism in the workplace involves the impact of narcissistic employees and managers in workplace settings.

References

  1. 1 2 3 4 Winnicott, Donald (1960). "Ego distortion in terms of true and false self". The Maturational Process and the Facilitating Environment: Studies in the Theory of Emotional Development. New York City: International Universities Press, Inc: 140–57. ISBN   978-0946439843.
  2. ↑ Salman Akhtar, Good Feelings (London 2009) p. 128
  3. 1 2 Jacobus, Mary (2005). The Poetics of Psychoanalysis. Oxford. p. 160.
  4. ↑ Grolnick, Simon (1990). The Work & Play of Winnicott. Aronson. p. 44.
  5. ↑ Minsky, Rosalind (1996). Psychoanalysis and Gender. London. p. 118.
  6. ↑ Klein, Josephine (1994). Our Need for Others. London. p. 241.
  7. ↑ Klein, Josephine (1994). Our Need for Others. London. p. 365.
  8. ↑ Minsky, Rosalind (1996). Psychoanalysis and Gender. London. pp. 119–20.
  9. ↑ Phillips, Adam (1994). On Kissing, Tickling and Being Bored. London. pp. 30–31.
  10. ↑ Otto Fenichel, The Psychoanalytic Theory of Neurosis (London 1946) p. 445
  11. ↑ Mary Jacobus, The Poetics of Psychoanalysis: In the Wake of Klein (Oxford 2005) p. 37
  12. ↑ Jacques Lacan, Ecrits: A Selection (London 1997) p. 128
  13. ↑ Adam Phillips, Winnicott (Harvard 1988) p. 136
  14. ↑ J. H. Padel, "Freudianism: Later Developments", in Richard Gregory ed., The Oxford Companion to the Mind (Oxford 1987) p. 273
  15. ↑ Erich Fromm (1942), The Fear of Freedom (London: Routledge & Kegan Paul 2001) p. 175
  16. ↑ Quoted in Carl Rogers, On Becoming a Person (1961) p. 110
  17. ↑ Horney, Karen (1950). Neurosis and Human Growth . Norton. ISBN   0-393-00135-0.
  18. ↑ Eugene M. DeRobertis, Humanizing Child Development Theories (2008), p. 38
  19. ↑ Janet Malcolm, Psychoanalysis: The Impossible Profession (London 1988) p. 136
  20. ↑ Heinz Kohut, How Does Analysis Cure? (London 1984), pp. 142, 167.
  21. ↑ Lowen, Alexander. Narcissism: Denial of the true self. Simon & Schuster, 2004, 1984.
  22. ↑ Fox, Margalit (April 20, 2010). "Dr. James Masterson, expert on personality disorders; at 84". Boston.com– via The Boston Globe.
  23. ↑ Neville Symington, Narcissism: A New Theory (London 2003) pp. 36, 115
  24. ↑ Polly Young-Eisandrath, Women and Desire (London 2000) pp. 112, 198
  25. ↑ Neville Symington, Narcissism: A New Theory (London 2003) p. 104
  26. ↑ Simon Crompton, All about Me: Loving a Narcissist (London 2007) p. 7
  27. ↑ Vaknin S The Dual Role of the Narcissist's False Self
  28. ↑ Samuel Vaknin/Lidija Rangelovska Malignant Self-Love (2003) pp. 187–88
  29. ↑ Alice Miller, The Drama of the Gifted Child (2004) p. 21
  30. ↑ Janet Malcolm, Psychoanalysis: The Impossible Profession (London 1988) p. 135
  31. ↑ Alice Miller, The Drama of Being a Child (2004) p. 45
  32. ↑ Susie Orbach, Bodies (London 2009) p. 67
  33. ↑ D. W. Winnicott, Winnicott on the Child (2002) p. 76
  34. ↑ Susie Orbach, The Impossibility of Sex (Penguin 1999) pp. 48, 216
  35. ↑ Susie Orbach, in Lawrence Spurling ed., Winnicott Studies (1995) p. 6
  36. ↑ Susie Orbach, Bodies (London 2009) pp. 67–72
  37. ↑ Mario Jacoby, Shame and the Origins of Self-Esteem (1996) pp. 59–60
  38. ↑ Polly Young-Eisendrath/James Albert Hall, Jung's Self Psychology (1991) p. 29
  39. ↑ Daniel Stern, The Interpersonal World of the Infant (1985) pp. 7, 93
  40. ↑ Daniel Stern, The Interpersonal World of the Infant (1985) p. 227
  41. ↑ Michael Jacobs, D. W. Winnicott (1995) p. 129
  42. ↑ Neville Symington, Narcissism: A New Theory (London 2003) p. 97
  43. ↑ V. R. Sherwood/C. P. Cohen, Psychotherapy of the Quiet Borderline Patient (1994) p. 50
  44. ↑ Paul Rabinov ed., The Foucault Reader (1991) p. 362
  45. ↑ Quoted in Jon Simons ed. Contemporary Critical Theorists (2006) p. 196
  46. ↑ A. Schapiro, Barbara (1995). Literature and the Relational Self. p. 52.
  47. ↑ Kroll, Judith (1976). Chapters in a Mythology: The Poetry of Sylvia Plath. pp. 182–84.

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