Etiquette in Asia

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In Asia, paying respect to elders is expected among younger people, a gesture such as bowing expresses the utmost respect. The elaborate and refined Japanese tea ceremony is also meant to demonstrate respect through grace and good etiquette. Bundesarchiv Bild 102-11997, Japan, Teezeremonie.jpg
In Asia, paying respect to elders is expected among younger people, a gesture such as bowing expresses the utmost respect. The elaborate and refined Japanese tea ceremony is also meant to demonstrate respect through grace and good etiquette.

Etiquette in Asia varies from country to country even though certain actions may seem to be common. No article on the rules of etiquette, nor any list of faux pas, can ever be complete. As the perception of behaviors and actions vary, intercultural competence is essential. A lack of knowledge about the customs and expectations of Asian people can make even those with good intentions seem rude, foolish, and disrespectful.

Contents

Asian etiquette is often manifested with shades of "respect", "good manners" and "filial", and is highly influenced by Chinese culture. [1] [2] [3]

Bangladesh

Bangladeshi society is reserved and very structured. While the norms change or vary, there are timeless customs such as respect for the elders and high regard for family. Old people are always treated with deference and it is considered rude for a young person to be direct and opinionated when talking to elders. Even prolonged eye contact with a senior is considered bad manners. [4]

Bangladeshis are modest people and it is not recommended to give excessive praise [4] and can be interpreted as insincere and offensive. Religion serves as a strong influence on etiquette. It is not acceptable for a man to shake hands with a woman if the latter did not offer a hand first. Along with social categorization, religion dictates what is allowed and prohibited. [5]

When it comes to business, the etiquette is similar to those found in other Asian countries such as not being direct when communicating one's position or ideas. [6]

Brunei

Southeast Asians are very family-oriented and celebrations are a chance to meet extended kinsmen. In Islamic culture, modesty in dress etiquette is important, such as the tudong (hijab). Muslim women in tudungs at an engagement party, Brunei - 20100531.jpg
Southeast Asians are very family-oriented and celebrations are a chance to meet extended kinsmen. In Islamic culture, modesty in dress etiquette is important, such as the tudong (hijab).

Etiquette in Brunei is similar to that of Malaysia.[ citation needed ]

China

Eating is a dominant aspect of Chinese culture and eating out is one of the most common ways to honour guests, socialize, and deepen friendships. Generally, Chinese etiquette is very similar to that in other East Asian countries such as Korea and Japan, with some exceptions. In most traditional Chinese dining, dishes are shared communally. Although both square and rectangular tables are used for small groups of people, round tables are preferred for large groups. There is a specific seating order to every formal dinner, based on seniority and organizational hierarchy. The seat of honour, reserved for the host or oldest person, is usually the one in the center facing east or facing the entrance. Chopsticks are used instead of forks and knives. [7] In most Chinese restaurants, there is no tip required unless it is explicitly posted. [8] Tea is almost always provided, either in advance of the diners being seated or immediately afterward. A verbal "thank you" (谢谢; xiexie) should be offered to the server pouring the tea. [9]

Handshake etiquette

The order of handshakes is mainly determined by the principle of "the elder comes first". In formal occasions, the order of extending hands when shaking hands is mainly determined by position and identity. In general occasions, it is mainly determined by age, gender, and marital status.

  1. When a person of higher position shakes hands with a person of lower position, the person of higher position should extend his hand first.
  2. When a lady shakes hands with a man, the lady should extend her hand first.
  3. When an elder shakes hands with a younger person, the elder should extend his hand first.
  4. When a married person shakes hands with an unmarried person, the married person should extend his hand first.
  5. When a teacher shakes hands with a student, the teacher should extend his hand first.
  6. When the first person to arrive shakes hands with the last person in a social occasion, the first person to arrive should extend his hand first.
  7. When the host entertains guests, he should extend his hand first to shake hands with the visiting guest; when the guest leaves, the guest should extend his hand first. [10]

Bowing etiquette

Bowing in China was originally a sacrificial ritual that was formed during the Shang Dynasty. After the Xinhai Revolution abolished the kneeling ritual, bowing became the most equal social etiquette. [11] At that time, people believed that bending the sacrifices such as cattle and sheep into a bow shape on the altar was the only way to express respect and piety to the heaven. Later generations interpreted it as a daily etiquette, bending over, lowering the head, avoiding the other person's sight, to show obedience and lack of hostility. Now we can see that bowing has become a common etiquette for greeting people, showing respect, gratitude, and apology. [12] When bowing, be careful not to be disrespectful. For example, do not take off your hat, talk while bowing, or even laugh, look around, eat, put one hand in your pocket, etc. When bowing, avoid the recipient's line of sight, which is the key to showing respect and obedience. When trying to look at the other person's face, you will have to raise your head, tilt your head, roll your eyes up, and make the bow look funny, which is a serious disrespect for the other person. When you should bow, nodding and bowing is a disrespectful expression of the recipient. [13]

Chinese table manners

The seating rule is that if it is a round table, the person facing the door is the host and guest, and the left and right positions of the host and guest are determined by the distance between the host and guest. The closer the host and guest are, the more respected they are. At the same distance, the left side is more respected than the right side. The host should arrive early, wait at the door, and guide guests to their seats. Invitees will be seated as arranged by the host. [14]

Don't stick your chopsticks straight into the bowl when eating, as this will look like burning incense. Be sure to put down your chopsticks when drinking soup. Never hold a spoon and chopsticks in your hands at the same time, otherwise it is very impolite. When picking up food, do not use chopsticks to stir inside the food; do not place chopsticks on the bowl after eating. [15]

Ancient Chinese sacrificial rituals

Sacrifice is a ritual with a long history. It is called the auspicious ritual in the ancient Chinese ritual system and ranks first among the five rituals. There were many objects of sacrifice in ancient China, among which the three most basic elements were heaven, earth, and human beings. Later, it evolved into the ritual of three sacrifices: offering sacrifices to heaven and earth, offering sacrifices to ancestors, and offering sacrifices to sages. Qingming Festival is the most extensive ceremony to worship ancestors and has profound cultural connotations. [16]

Today's sacrifices are commonly known as tomb sweeping, which is a sacrificial activity for deceased relatives. According to traditional customs, when sweeping the tomb, people should bring wine, food, fruits, paper money and other items to the cemetery, offer the food in front of the tomb of their relatives, burn the paper money, cover the tomb with new soil, break a few new green branches and insert them on the tomb. Then he kowtows and worships, and finally goes home after eating wine and food. [17]

Congratulation etiquette

It is generally used during festivals as a way of showing respect to the elders from younger generations or people with lower status, and is also used to congratulate each other among peers. When giving congratulatory gifts, you should not only have a respectful attitude and read congratulatory messages, but also give congratulatory gifts. [18]

India

Etiquette in India shares many similarities with its South and Southeast Asian neighbours, however, there are exceptions found throughout the country. [19]

Indonesia

Paying respect to elders and obeying teachers are expected among Asian youth, such as shown here in Indonesia. The students quietly listen to their teacher's explanation during their school excursion. Trowulan Museum 4.jpg
Paying respect to elders and obeying teachers are expected among Asian youth, such as shown here in Indonesia. The students quietly listen to their teacher's explanation during their school excursion.

It is important to understand that Indonesia is a vast tropical country of sprawling archipelago with extremely diverse culture. Each of these Indonesian ethnic groups has its own culture, tradition and may speak its own language. Each of them may adhere to different religions that have their own rules. These combinations made Indonesia a complex mixture of traditions that may differ from one place to another. Indonesia shares many of the points of etiquette with other Southeast Asian nations. As Indonesia has a Muslim majority population, some points of etiquette in the Middle East also apply. Following are some key points of Indonesian etiquette: [20]

It is important to be considerate of other people's dignity. Shaming or humiliating people in public is considered extremely rude. [21]

One should always use their right hand when shaking hands, offering a gift, handing or receiving something, eating, pointing or generally touching another person. [21]

Japan

Japanese customs and etiquette can be especially complex and demanding. The knowledge that non-Japanese who commit faux pas act from inexperience can fail to offset the negative emotional response some Japanese people feel when their expectations in matters of etiquette are not met.

Korea

Like many Asian people, Koreans observe points of etiquette related to local forms of Buddhism. Shown here is the Buddha statue at Seokguram Grotto, a National Treasure of South Korea. Seokguram Buddha.JPG
Like many Asian people, Koreans observe points of etiquette related to local forms of Buddhism. Shown here is the Buddha statue at Seokguram Grotto, a National Treasure of South Korea.

Malaysia

Pakistan

In urban Sindh and in other parts of the country, men and women usually lower their head and lift their hand to their forehead to make the "adab" gesture when greeting each other, instead of a handshake.

Philippines

The gate of Fuerza de Santiago in Manila. The three centuries of Spanish rule left an indelible mark on Filipino customs, art and society. Fort Santiago Gate.jpg
The gate of Fuerza de Santiago in Manila. The three centuries of Spanish rule left an indelible mark on Filipino customs, art and society.

Three centuries of Spanish and 48 years of American rule, as well as the influence of Japan, China, India, Middle East and the West, have added to the classic indigenous etiquette of the Philippines. It has become a unique and particularly formal sense of etiquette concerning social functions, filial piety and public behaviour. Age is an important determinant in social structure and behaviour, dictating the application of honour, precedence, and title.

Singapore

Thailand

Turkey

See also

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References

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  4. 1 2 Shrestha, Nanda; Paul, Bimal (2002). Nepal and Bangladesh: A Global Studies Handbook. Santa Barbara, CA: ABC-CLIO. p. 290. ISBN   1576072851.
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  7. "Chinese Food Culture: Table Manners, Dining Etiquette". www.travelchinaguide.com. Retrieved 2018-12-05.
  8. Lan, Ye (2023-09-27). "既无"小费"又不限制用餐时间,居港外国人也爱北上消费" [With no "tipping" and no restrictions on dining hours, foreigners living in Hong Kong also love to go north to consume]. wappass.baidu.com. Retrieved 2024-06-06. 但最令他们感到惊喜的还是买单的时候,本来总开销为612元人民币,但深圳商家给他们抹去了零头,让他们只支付600元即可,"如果在美国,不但要给GST(商品及服务税),还要给15%至20%的小费,即便吃快餐也不能免除",但在深圳却没有这些强制性费用,令他们感到十分开心。该租客表示,以后每周五下班后都要赴深圳消费。[But what surprised them the most was the bill. The total cost was 612 RMB, but the Shenzhen merchant eliminated the difference and asked them to pay only 600 RMB. "In the United States, we have to pay not only GST (Goods and Services Tax), but also 15% to 20% tip, even for fast food." But in Shenzhen, there are no such mandatory fees, which makes them very happy. The tenant said that he will go to Shenzhen every Friday after get off work.]
  9. "这篇文章告诉你,为什么酒店餐厅需要提供茶叶茶水服务" [This article tells you why hotels and restaurants need to provide tea service]. www.sohu.com. 2021-10-27. Retrieved 2024-06-06. 在这样的背景之下,酒店餐馆除了可提供免费茶水外,还可以在菜单中添加上茶饮,方便不同年龄、爱好的客人,根据自己的喜好做出选择,这既丰富了酒店餐厅的服务,同样也满足了当下人对于健康的追求。[In this context, in addition to providing free tea, hotels and restaurants can also add tea drinks to their menus to make it easier for guests of different ages and hobbies to make choices based on their preferences. This not only enriches the services of hotel restaurants, but also meets people's current pursuit of health.]
  10. "【文明讲堂】握手礼仪篇" [【Civilization Lecture】Handshake etiquette]. m.thepaper.cn. 2021-04-04. Retrieved 2024-06-05. 握手的顺序主要取决于"尊者优先"的原则。在正式场合下,握手时伸手的先后次序主要取决于职位、身份。在一般场合,则主要取决于年龄、性别、婚否。(1)职位高的人与职位低的人握手,应由职位高的人先伸手为礼。(2)女士与男士握手,应由女士先伸手为礼。(3)长辈与晚辈握手,应由长辈先伸手为礼。(4)已婚者与未婚者握手,应由已婚者先伸手为礼。(5)老师与学生握手,应由老师先伸手为礼。(6)社交场合的先到者与后到者握手,应由先到者先伸手为礼。(7)主人待客时应先伸手,与来访客人握手;客人告辞时,应由客人先伸手为礼。[The order of handshakes is mainly determined by the principle of "the elder comes first". In formal occasions, the order of extending hands when shaking hands is mainly determined by position and identity. In general occasions, it is mainly determined by age, gender, and marital status.(1) When a person of higher position shakes hands with a person of lower position, the person of higher position should extend his hand first.(2) When a lady shakes hands with a man, the lady should extend her hand first.(3) When an elder shakes hands with a younger person, the elder should extend his hand first.(4) When a married person shakes hands with an unmarried person, the married person should extend his hand first.(5) When a teacher shakes hands with a student, the teacher should extend his hand first.(6) When the first person to arrive shakes hands with the last person in a social occasion, the first person to arrive should extend his hand first.(7) When the host entertains guests, he should extend his hand first to shake hands with the visiting guest; when the guest leaves, the guest should extend his hand first.]
  11. "《觉醒年代》中的鞠躬礼 | 文明礼仪小知识" [Bowing in "Awakening Age" | Tips on etiquette]. m.thepaper.cn. 2021-07-08. Retrieved 2024-06-05. 鞠躬,原为祭祀之礼,形成于商朝。辛亥革命废除跪拜礼后,鞠躬成为最平等的社交礼仪。[Bowing was originally a sacrificial ritual that was formed in the Shang Dynasty. After the Xinhai Revolution abolished the kneeling ceremony, bowing became the most equal social etiquette.]
  12. Baofeng, Ma (2013-01-12). "说说鞠躬礼(礼仪漫谈(110))" [Talking about bowing (Etiquette talk (110))]. paper.people.com.cn. Retrieved 2024-06-05. 鞠躬,即上身向前弯曲,源自我国古代祭天仪式。当时人们认为,在祭坛上将牛、羊等祭品弯成鞠形,才能表达对上天的恭敬与虔诚。后世演绎成日常礼节,弯腰、低头,避开对方视线,向其表示恭顺和没有敌意。现在我们看到,鞠躬礼已经成了向人致意、表示尊敬、谢意、致歉等方面的常用礼节。[Bowing, which means bending the upper body forward, originated from the ancient Chinese ritual of offering sacrifices to heaven. At that time, people believed that only by bending the sacrifices such as cattle and sheep into a bow shape on the altar could they express their respect and piety to heaven. Later generations interpreted it into daily etiquette, bending over, lowering the head, avoiding the other person's sight, to show obedience and lack of hostility. Now we can see that bowing has become a common etiquette for greeting people, showing respect, gratitude, and apology.]
  13. Baofeng, Ma (2013-01-12). "说说鞠躬礼(礼仪漫谈(110))" [Talking about bowing (Etiquette talk (110))]. paper.people.com.cn. Retrieved 2024-06-05. 鞠躬行礼时,忌讳不郑重。如不脱帽,或边鞠躬边说话,甚至嬉笑、左顾右盼、吃东西、一只手插在衣袋里等。鞠躬时应避开受礼人视线,这是表示恭敬、恭顺的重点所在。鞠躬时试图看对方的脸,势必要把头抬起、倾斜,使眼睛上翻,使鞠躬动作滑稽可笑,是不尊重对方的严重失礼行为。在应该行鞠躬礼的时候,以点头哈腰应付,是轻视受礼人的不严肃表现。[When bowing, be careful not to be disrespectful. For example, do not take off your hat, talk while bowing, or even laugh, look around, eat, put one hand in your pocket, etc. When bowing, avoid the recipient's line of sight, which is the key to showing respect and obedience. When trying to look at the other person's face, you will have to raise your head, tilt your head, roll your eyes up, and make the bow look funny, which is a serious disrespect for the other person. When you should bow, nodding and bowing is a disrespectful and disrespectful expression of the recipient.]
  14. Guangliang, Shi (2017-12-22). "中国餐桌礼仪:你可千万别坐错了位置" [Chinese table manners: Don’t sit in the wrong seat]. m.xinhuanet.com. Retrieved 2024-04-18. 总的来讲,座次是"尚左尊东""面朝大门为尊"。若是圆桌,则正对大门的为主客,主客左右手边的位置,则以离主客的距离来看,越靠近主客位置越尊,相同距离则左侧尊于右侧。如果你是主人,你应该提前到达,然后在靠门位置等待,并为来宾引座。如果你是被邀请者,那么就应听从东道主安排入座。[Generally speaking, the seating order is "to the left and to the east" and "to face the door is to respect". If it is a round table, the one facing the door is the host and guest, and the positions to the left and right of the host and guest are based on the distance from the host and guest. The closer the host and guest are, the more respectable they are. At the same distance, the left side is more respected than the right side. If you are the host, you should arrive early, then wait near the door and lead the guests to their seats. If you are an invitee, you should follow the host's seating arrangements.]
  15. Runping, Yao (2017-01-25). "【提醒】过年聚餐,这些餐桌礼仪别忘啦" [[Reminder] Don’t forget these table manners during Chinese New Year gatherings]. www.xinhuanet.com. Retrieved 2024-04-18. 筷子不能竖插在碗里,原因是插在碗里像烧香,不太好。另外,盛汤时,一定要把筷子放下,绝不可以勺子、筷子同时拿在手上,否则是很不礼貌的。
    夹菜时,不能用筷子在菜里面翻来翻去的挑;吃饭时不能将菜、饭掉在桌上、地上到处都是;碗里的饭要吃干净,要吃得一粒不剩;吃完后筷子不能搁在碗上。
    [Don't stick chopsticks upright in a bowl because it looks like burning incense, which is not good. In addition, when serving soup, you must put down your chopsticks. Never hold a spoon and chopsticks in your hand at the same time, otherwise it is very impolite.
    When picking up vegetables, do not use chopsticks to turn around inside the vegetables; when eating, do not drop vegetables or rice on the table or everywhere on the floor; eat the rice in the bowl cleanly, and eat every grain; Do not place chopsticks on the bowl after eating.]
  16. "深入挖掘清明节丰厚的文化意蕴" [Deeply explore the rich cultural connotations of Qingming Festival]. news.cctv.com. 2016-04-03. Retrieved 2024-06-10. 祭祀是一种具有悠久历史的礼仪,在古代礼仪体系中被称为吉礼,位居五礼之首。中国古代祭祀对象繁多,其中最基本的三要素是天、地、人,后来演变成三祭之礼:祭天地、祭袓先、祭圣贤。清明节属于最为广泛的祭祀祖先之礼,具有深厚的文化蕴含。[Sacrifice is a ritual with a long history. In the ancient ritual system, it is called auspicious ceremony and ranks first among the five rituals. In ancient China, there were many objects of sacrifice, among which the three most basic elements were heaven, earth and man. Later, it evolved into three rituals of sacrifice: sacrifice to heaven and earth, sacrifice to ancestors, and sacrifice to saints. Qingming Festival is the most widespread ritual of ancestor worship, with profound cultural connotations.]
  17. Xing, Han (April 3, 2016). "深入挖掘清明节丰厚的文化意蕴" [Deeply explore the rich cultural connotation of Qingming Festival]. news.cctv.com. Retrieved 2024-05-16. 扫墓俗称上坟,是对已故亲人的祭祀活动。按照传统习俗,扫墓时,人们要携带酒食果品、纸钱等物品到墓地,将食物供祭在亲人墓前,再将纸钱焚化,为坟墓培上新土,折几枝嫩绿的新枝插在坟上,然后叩头行礼祭拜,最后吃掉酒食回家。[Tomb sweeping, commonly known as visiting graves, is a sacrificial activity for deceased relatives. According to traditional customs, when sweeping graves, people should bring wine, food, fruits, paper money and other items to the cemetery, offer food in front of the graves of their relatives, burn the paper money, add new soil to the graves, break off a few green branches and insert them on the graves, then kowtow and pay homage, and finally eat the wine and food and go home.]
  18. "【文明礼仪】如此优秀中国传统礼仪文化你知道吗?赶紧学起来!" [[Civilized Etiquette] Do you know the excellent Chinese traditional etiquette culture? Learn quickly!]. m.thepaper.cn. 2023-03-17. Retrieved 2024-05-17. 一般行于节庆期间,是晚辈或低级地位的人向尊长的礼敬,同辈之间也有相互的拜贺。行拜贺礼时,不仅态度恭敬,口诵贺词,俯首叩拜,同时也得有贺礼奉上。[Generally used during festivals, it is a salute from juniors or people with lower status to their elders, and also to congratulate each other among peers. When performing the congratulatory ceremony, you should not only be respectful, recite the congratulatory message, and bow your head, but also be presented with congratulatory gifts.]
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