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 Relationships (Outline) |
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Polyfidelity is a type of non-monogamous, relationship in which all members are recognized as equivalent to the other partners and comply to restrict sexual and romantic relationship activities to exclusively only other members within the group.
The practices and beliefs underlying polyfidelity have long existed, but in uncodified fashion. The Oneida Commune of the mid-19th century practiced complex marriage, encouraging individual members in the freedom to have multiple ongoing sexual relationships within the community, as an expression of their beliefs and religious faith. This was occasionally referred to as a group marriage, a term brought back to popular recognition by the 1974 publication of Group Marriage: a study of contemporary multilateral marriage by Larry Constantine and Joan Constantine.
The term polyfidelity was also practiced in the "New Tribe" of the Kerista Commune. [1] [2] [3] [4] A utopian community based in the Haight-Ashbury district of San Francisco, California active from the 1970s to the early 1990s. The engaged in a specific form of polyamory. Members were required to engage in multi-partner relationships that prioritize equality, and mutual consent. Respecting diverse gender identities and sexual orientations. Sexual activity with all members was encouraged while forming exclusive relationships within the group was discouraged. Consensus was essential for incorporating new members in and also respecting the group's foundational agreement.
The broader term polyamory was coined later. [5] The word "polyamorous" first appeared in an article by Morning Glory Zell-Ravenheart, "A Bouquet of Lovers", published in May 1990 in Green Egg magazine, as "poly-amorous". In May 1992, Jennifer L. Wesp created the Usenet newsgroup alt.polyamory, and the Oxford English Dictionary (OED) cites the proposal to create that group as the first verified appearance of the word. The words polyamory, polyamorous, and polyamorist were added to the OED in 2006. [6]
Polyfidelitous relationships are, like monogamous relationships, closed in the sense that partners agree not to be sexually or romantically intimate with someone not in the relationship. The difference is that more than two people are included in the closed group. New members may generally be added to the group only by unanimous agreement of the existing members, or the group may not be interested in further expansion.
While being a subtype of the more general polyamory, polyfidelity can resemble monogamy in its relationship power dynamics, attitudes towards autonomy, and group consent, as most often polyfidelity develops from an established closed-monogamous couple seeking to add one or more individuals or another couple. In this sense, polyfidelity expands upon standard practices and beliefs of monogamy while still being categorically polyamory.
A commonly cited advantage of polyfidelity is the ability to have unprotected sex among more than two people while maintaining relative safety regarding STDs, so long as any new members are sufficiently tested before fluid bonding with the group, and keep their commitments. This would have health advantages similar to monogamy, although risks rise somewhat with each person added.
Some gain a sense of emotional safety from the relatively closed nature of the poly faithful commitment.
Polyfidelity inherently affords less flexibility than other forms of nonmonogamy. For example, open relationships do not restrict sexual interactions to specific people.
As many polyfidelitous people have transitioned directly from closed monogamy, they can encounter problems in learning to communicate intimately with more than one partner.
People hoping to create or expand a group marriage mention difficulty finding potential partners with enough mutual compatibility to even consider attempting a relationship.
Polyfidelity, like other forms of consensual non-monogamy, can present the challenge of managing jealousy, [8] maintaining clear communication, and ensuring equitable distribution of emotional and practical responsibilities. Successful polyfidelity often requires strong commitment and communication skills among all members.
In the book Lesbian Polyfidelity, author Celeste West uses the term polyfidelity in much the same way that others use polyamory. This may represent independent coinage of the same term within a different community, and this usage is not common among polyamorists in general. West uses the term to emphasize the concept (common in polyamory) that one can be faithful to one's commitments without those commitments including sexual exclusivity.
Polyamory is the practice of, or the desire for, romantic relationships with more than one partner at the same time, with the informed consent of all partners involved. Some people who identify as polyamorous believe in consensual non-monogamy with a conscious management of jealousy and reject the view that sexual and relational exclusivity (monogamy) are prerequisite for deep, committed, long-term, loving relationships. Others prefer to restrict their sexual activity to only members of the group, a closed polyamorous relationship that is usually referred to as polyfidelity.
Swinging, earlier commonly known as wife-swapping, is a sexual activity in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship sexually engage with others for recreational purposes. Swinging is a form of non-monogamy. People may choose a swinging lifestyle for a variety of reasons. Practitioners cite an increased quality and quantity of sex. Some people may engage in swinging to add variety into their otherwise conventional sex lives or due to their curiosity. Some couples see swinging as a healthy outlet and means to strengthen their relationship.
Infidelity is a violation of a couple's emotional or sexual exclusivity that commonly results in feelings of anger, sexual jealousy, and rivalry.
Open marriage is a form of non-monogamy in which the partners of a dyadic marriage agree that each may engage in extramarital sexual or romantic relationships, without this being regarded by them as infidelity, and consider or establish an open relationship despite the implied monogamy of marriage. There are variant forms of open marriage such as swinging and polyamory, each with the partners having varying levels of input into their spouse's activities.
An open relationship is an intimate relationship that is sexually non-monogamous. An open relationship generally indicates a relationship where there is a primary emotional and intimate relationship between partners, who agree to at least the possibility of sexual or emotional intimacy with other people. The term "open relationship" is sometimes used interchangeably with the term polyamory, but the two concepts are not identical.
Group marriage or conjoint marriage is a marital arrangement where three or more adults enter into sexual, affective, romantic, or otherwise intimate short- or long-term partnerships, and share in any combination of finances, residences, care or kin work. Group marriage is considered a form of polygamy. While academic usage has traditionally treated group marriage as a marital arrangement, more recent usage has expanded the concept to allow for the inclusion of non-conjugal unions. Colloquial usage of group marriage has also been associated with polyamory and polyamorous families.
Dorothy "Dossie" Easton, who has also written under the name Scarlet Woman, is an American author and family therapist based in San Francisco, California.
The Ethical Slut is a self-help book about non-monogamy written by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy. In the book, Easton and Hardy discuss non-monogamy as a concept and a practice, and explore sexual practices and common challenges in non-monogamous relationships.
Non-monogamy is an umbrella term for every practice or philosophy of non-dyadic intimate relationship that does not strictly hew to the standards of monogamy, particularly that of having only one person with whom to exchange sex, love, and/or affection. In that sense, "nonmonogamy" may be accurately applied to extramarital sex, group marriage, or polyamory. It is not synonymous with infidelity, since all parties are consenting to the relationship structure, partners are often committed to each other as well as to their other partners and cheating is still considered problematic behavior with many non-monogamous relationships.
Kerista was a utopian community that was started in New York City in 1956 by John Peltz "Bro Jud" Presmont. Throughout much of its history, Kerista was centered on the ideals of polyfidelity, as well as the creation of intentional communities. Kerista underwent several incarnations that later became known as the "Old Tribe", which was associated with a fairly large but fluid membership.
The following outline is provided as an overview of and topical guide to interpersonal relationships.
Terminology within polyamory looks at the evolution and meaning of the word "polyamory" itself, as well as alternative definitions and concepts which closely relate to it.
Loving More is a non-profit organization formed to support and advocate on behalf of polyamorous people.
A committed relationship is an interpersonal relationship based upon agreed-upon commitment to one another involving love, trust, honesty, openness, or some other behavior. Forms of committed relationships include close friendship, long-term relationships, engagement, marriage, and civil unions.
Monogamy is a relationship of two individuals in which they form a mutual and exclusive intimate partnership. Having only one partner at any one time, whether that be for life or whether that be serial monogamy, contrasts with various forms of non-monogamy. More generally, the term is used to describe the behavioral ecology and sexual selection of animal mating systems, referring to the state of having only one mate at any one given time. In a human cultural context, monogamy typically refers to the custom of two individuals, regardless of orientation, committing to a sexually exclusive relationship.
Amatonormativity is the set of societal assumptions that everyone prospers with an exclusive romantic relationship. Elizabeth Brake coined the neologism to capture societal assumptions about romance. Brake wanted to describe the pressure she received by many to prioritize marriage in her own life when she did not want to. Amatonormativity extends beyond social pressures for marriage to include general pressures involving romance.
Polyamory in the United States is the practice of, or the desire for, romantic relationships with more than one partner at the same time, with the informed consent of all partners involved, in the United States. Polyamory is a relationship type that is practiced by a minority of the population in the United States, about 4 to 5 percent. According to a 2016 study, 20 percent of singles in the US have attempted some form of consensual non-monogamy at some point of their lives, such as polyamory or open relationships. In a study, polyamorous couples tend to identify as bisexual and pansexual.
Queerplatonic relationships (QPR), also known as queerplatonic partnerships (QPP), are committed intimate relationships between significant others whose relationship is not romantic in nature. A queerplatonic relationship differs from a close friendship by having the same explicit commitment, status, and structure as a formal romantic relationship, whilst it differs from a romantic relationship by not involving feelings of romantic love. The concept originates in aromantic and asexual spaces in the LGBT community. Like romantic relationships, queerplatonic relationships are sometimes said to involve a deeper and more profound emotional connection than typical friendship.
Mononormativity or mono-normativity is the normative assumption that monogamy is healthier or more natural than ethical non-monogamy, as well as the societal enforcement of such an assumption. It has been widely tied to various forms of discrimination or bias against polyamory.
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