Swinging, earlier commonly known as wife-swapping, is a sexual activity in which both singles and partners in a committed relationship sexually engage with others for recreational purposes.[1] Swinging is a form of non-monogamy. People may choose a swinging lifestyle for a variety of reasons. Practitioners cite an increased quality and quantity of sex. Some people may engage in swinging to add variety into their otherwise conventional sex lives or due to their curiosity. Some couples see swinging as a healthy outlet and means to strengthen their relationship.[1] The term "wife swapping" was introduced by the media in the United States during the 1950s to describe this emerging phenomenon.[1] Swinging, or its wider discussion and practice, is regarded by some as arising from the freer attitudes to sexual activity after the sexual revolution of the 1960s, the invention and availability of the contraceptive pill, and the emergence of treatments for many of the sexually transmitted infections that were known at that time. The adoption of safe sex practices became more common in the late 1980s. It is also a recurring theme in pornography.
The swingers community sometimes refers to itself as "the lifestyle", or as "the alternative lifestyle".[2]
Description
John Stossel produced an investigative news report into the swinging lifestyle. Stossel's report in 2005 cited Terry Gould's research, which concluded that "couples swing in order to not cheat on their partners". When Stossel asked swinging couples whether they worry their spouse will "find they like someone else better", one male replied, "People in the swinging community swing for a reason. They don't swing to go out and find a new wife", a woman asserted, "It makes women more confident – that they are the ones in charge". Stossel interviewed 12 marriage counselors. According to Stossel, "not one of them said don't do it", though some said "getting sexual thrills outside of marriage can threaten a marriage". Swingers whom Stossel interviewed said "their marriages are stronger because they don't have affairs and they don't lie to each other".[3]
Swinging can take place in a number of contexts, ranging from spontaneous sexual activity involving partner swapping or adding a third or more participants at an informal gathering of friends to planned regular social meetings to "hooking up" with like-minded people at a sex club (also known as a swinger club, not to be confused with a strip club). Different clubs offer varied facilities and atmospheres, and often hold "theme" nights.
Swinging is also known to take place in semi-public venues such as hotels, resorts, or cruise ships, or often in private homes.[4] Furthermore, many websites that cater to swinging couples now exist, some having hundreds of thousands of members.[4]
In 2018, a study of the prevalence of non-monogamous practices in the United States estimated that 2.35% of Americans currently self-identify as swingers and 4.76% had identified as swingers at some point in their lifetime.[5][6]
Effects
Relationship quality
Research on swinging has been conducted in the United States since the late 1960s. One 2000 study, based on an Internet questionnaire addressed to visitors of swinger-related sites, found swingers reported happiness is higher in their relationships than the norm-reported happiness.[1] Some believe sexual attraction is part of human nature and should be openly enjoyed by a committed or married couple. An analysis of multiple studies showed 37% of husbands and 29% of wives admitted at least one extramarital affair.[7]
Sexually-transmitted infections
Swingers are exposed to the same types of risks as people who engage in casual sex, with the main concerns being the risk of pregnancy or contracting a sexually transmitted infection (STI). Some swingers engage in unprotected sex, a practice known as barebacking, while others follow safe sex practices and will not engage with others who do not also practice safe sex. In most swingers' clubs, condoms are freely available and sometimes the club may require their use. Swingers may reduce the risk of STI by exchanging STI test results and serosorting. Proponents of swinging argue that safe sex is accepted within the swinging community and the risk of sexual disease is the same for them as for the general population– and that some populations of sexually non-monogamous people have clearly lower rates of STIs than the general population.[8] Opponents are also concerned about the risk of pregnancy and STIs such as HIV, arguing that even protected sex is risky given that some STIs may be spread regardless of the use of condoms, such as Herpes and HPV. In a 1992 study, an overall 7% of swingers had quit swinging because of the HIV/AIDS epidemic. It was also stated that 62% of swingers changed their sex practices, by becoming more selective with partners or by practicing safe sex.[9]
A Dutch study that compared the medical records of self-reported swingers to that of the general population found that STI prevalence was highest in young people, homosexual men, and swingers.[10] However, this study has been criticized as not being representative of swinger populations as a whole: its data was formulated solely on patients receiving treatment at an STI clinic. In addition, according to the conclusions of the report, the STI rates of swingers were in fact nearly identical to those of non-swinging straight couples, and concluded that the safest demographic for STI infection were female prostitutes. According to the Dutch study, "the combined rates of chlamydia and gonorrhea were just over 10% among straight people, 14% among gay men, just under 5% in female prostitutes, and 10.4% among swingers."[11]
While unwanted pregnancy is a risk with heterosexual vaginal sex in general, the possibility of impregnation by someone other than the committed-to partner adds a layer of concern, and may require prior discussion between the involved parties to establish consent about handling such a scenario.
In North American society
According to Terry Gould's The Lifestyle: A look at the erotic rites of swingers,[12] swinging began among American Air Force pilots and their wives during World War II before pilots left for overseas duty. The mortality rate of pilots was so high, as Gould reports, that a close bond arose between pilot families that implied that pilot husbands would care for all the wives as their own– emotionally and sexually– if the husbands were lost.[13] The realities of the demographics and basing of US Army Air Force (USAAF) pilots and crew suggest that this arrangement did not evolve during WWII, instead evolving later.[14] US military personnel in WWII were not accompanied by their families (and many, especially in the USAAF, were single) – the giant military bases where families live while accompanying a deployed soldier, sailor, aviator, or Marine are mostly Cold War creations.[15] By the time the Korean War ended, swinging had spread from the military to the suburbs. This phenomenon was usually referred to as wife-swapping.[16]
Later in the 1960s at the height of the Free Love movement, the activities associated with swinging became more widespread in a variety of social classes and age levels.[17] In the 1970s, sometimes referred to as "The Swinging '70s",[18] swinging activities became more prevalent, but were still considered "alternative" or "fringe" because of their association with non-mainstream groups such as communes.[19][bettersourceneeded]
A common myth claims that a "key party" is a form of swinger party, in which male partners place their car or house keys into a common bowl or bag on arriving, and at the end of the evening the female partners randomly select a set of keys from the bowl and are obligated to leave and have sex with its owner.[22] However, numerous researchers have tried unsuccessfully to confirm a first-hand account of such a party, suggesting that they are nothing more than an urban legend.[23]
According to economic studies on swinging,[24] the information and communications technology revolution, together with improvements in medicine, has been effective in reducing some of the costs of swinging and hence in increasing the number of swingers.
Swinger parties may involve various group sex activities. Partners can engage in penetrative sex, known as "full swap", or choose to "soft swap" in which they engage only in non-penetrative sex. New swinging couples often choose a soft swap before they are comfortable with a full swap, although many couples stay soft swap for personal reasons.[25]
Soft swinging
"Soft swinging" refers to couple engaging in sexual activities with only each other while other couples perform sex acts in the immediate vicinity.[26] Technically this is a form of exhibitionism rather than "group sex" per se.
↑ Bergstrand, Curtis R.; Sinski, Jennifer Blevins (2010). Swinging in America: love, sex, and marriage in the 21st century. Santa Barbara, Calif.: Praeger/ABC-CLIO. ISBN978-0313379666.
↑ Lehmiller, J. J. (2015). "A Comparison of Sexual Health History and Practices among Monogamous and Consensually Nonmonogamous Sexual Partners". The Journal of Sexual Medicine. 12 (10). NCBI: 2022–8. doi:10.1111/jsm.12987. PMID26395880.
Fellatio is an oral sex act consisting of the stimulation of a penis by using the mouth. Oral stimulation of the scrotum may also be termed fellatio, or colloquially as teabagging.
Human sexual activity, human sexual practice or human sexual behaviour is the manner in which humans experience and express their sexuality. People engage in a variety of sexual acts, ranging from activities done alone to acts with another person in varying patterns of frequency, for a wide variety of reasons. Sexual activity usually results in sexual arousal and physiological changes in the aroused person, some of which are pronounced while others are more subtle. Sexual activity may also include conduct and activities which are intended to arouse the sexual interest of another or enhance the sex life of another, such as strategies to find or attract partners, or personal interactions between individuals. Sexual activity may follow sexual arousal.
Sexual intercourse is a sexual activity typically involving the insertion and thrusting of the male penis inside the female vagina for sexual pleasure, reproduction, or both. This is also known as vaginal intercourse or vaginal sex. Sexual penetration has been known by humans since the dawn of time, and has been an instinctive form of sexual behaviour and psychology among humans. Other forms of penetrative sexual intercourse include anal sex, oral sex, fingering and penetration by use of a dildo, and vibrators. These activities involve physical intimacy between two or more people and are usually used among humans solely for physical or emotional pleasure. They can contribute to human bonding.
Safe sex is sexual activity using methods or contraceptive devices to reduce the risk of transmitting or acquiring sexually transmitted infections (STIs), especially HIV. "Safe sex" is also sometimes referred to as safer sex or protected sex to indicate that some safe sex practices do not eliminate STI risks. It is also sometimes used colloquially to describe methods aimed at preventing pregnancy that may or may not also lower STI risks.
Group sex is sexual activity involving more than two people. Participants in group sex can be of any sexual orientation or gender. Any form of sexual activity can be adopted to involve more than two participants, but some forms have their own names.
Promiscuity is the practice of engaging in sexual activity frequently with different partners or being indiscriminate in the choice of sexual partners. The term can carry a moral judgment. A common example of behavior viewed as promiscuous by many cultures is the one-night stand, and its frequency is used by researchers as a marker for promiscuity.
Infidelity is a violation of a couple's emotional or sexual exclusivity that commonly results in feelings of anger, sexual jealousy, and rivalry.
Open marriage is a form of non-monogamy in which the partners of a dyadic marriage agree that each may engage in extramarital sexual or romantic relationships, without this being regarded by them as infidelity, and consider or establish an open relationship despite the implied monogamy of marriage. There are variant forms of open marriage such as swinging and polyamory, each with the partners having varying levels of input into their spouse's activities.
An open relationship is an intimate relationship that is sexually or romantically non-monogamous. An open relationship generally indicates a relationship where there is a primary emotional and intimate relationship between partners, who agree to at least the possibility of sexual or emotional intimacy with other people. The term "open relationship" is sometimes used interchangeably with the term polyamory, but the two concepts are not identical.
Sex clubs, also known as swinger clubs or lifestyle clubs, are formal or informal groups that organize sex-related activities, or establishments where patrons can engage in sex acts with other patrons. A sex club or swinger club differs from a brothel in that while sex club patrons pay an entrance fee and may pay an annual membership fee, they only have an opportunity to have sex with other patrons, not with sex workers.
Casual sex is sexual activity that takes place outside a romantic relationship and implies an absence of commitment, emotional attachment, or familiarity between sexual partners. Examples are sexual activity while casually dating, one-night stands, prostitution or swinging and friends with benefits relationships.
Non-monogamy is an umbrella term that describes a relationship arrangement where one or more partners are not sexually and/or romantically exclusive to each other. Monogamy and non-monogamy are not strictly binary categories, but rather exist on a continuum encompassing various degrees of exclusivity and openness - at one end of this continuum lie strictly monogamous relationships, while at the other end are openly non-exclusive arrangements with numerous nuanced forms of varying degrees of openness in between. Non-monogamous relationships have been practiced across cultures and throughout history, reflecting diverse social norms, legal frameworks, and personal preferences.
Oral sex, sometimes referred to as oral intercourse, is sexual activity involving the stimulation of the genitalia of a person by another person using the mouth. Cunnilingus is oral sex performed on the vulva while fellatio is oral sex performed on the penis. Anilingus, another form of oral sex, is oral stimulation of the anus.
Serosorting, also known as serodiscrimination, is the practice of using HIV status as a decision-making point in choosing sexual behavior. The term is used to describe the behavior of a person who chooses a sexual partner assumed to be of the same HIV serostatus to engage in unprotected sex with them for a reduced risk of acquiring or transmitting HIV/AIDS.
Women who have sex with women (WSW) are women who engage in sexual activities with women, whether they identify as straight, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, have other sexualities, or dispense with sexual identification altogether. The term WSW is often used in medical literature to describe such women as a group for clinical study, without needing to consider sexual self-identity.
Non-penetrative sex or outercourse is sexual activity that usually does not include sexual penetration, but some forms, particularly when termed outercourse, include penetrative aspects, that may result from forms of fingering or oral sex. It generally excludes the penetrative aspects of vaginal, anal, or oral sex, but includes various forms of sexual and non-sexual activity, such as frottage, manual sex, mutual masturbation, kissing, or hugging.
Sexual activities involving women who have sex with women (WSW), regardless of their sexual orientation or sexual identity, can include oral sex, manual sex, or tribadism. Sex toys may be used.
Cunnilingus is an oral sex act consisting of the stimulation of a vulva by using the tongue and lips. The clitoris is the most sexually sensitive part of the vulva, and its stimulation may result in a woman becoming sexually aroused or achieving orgasm.
Uganda is one of the few Sub-Saharan African countries that has adopted abstinence-only sex education as an approach of sexual education that emphasizes abstinence from sexual intercourse until marriage as the only option. Abstinence-only sex education does not include joint curriculum covering other options including safe sex practices, family planning, and is espoused as the only sure way to avoid pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections. Uganda is commonly recognized as an exemplary case of lowering the rate of HIV prevalence. Prevalence figures may have also been distorted by the lack of treatment, meaning that the percentage of infected is decreased by disproportionately early deaths. Abstinence-only sex education has been implemented and supported for this cause to a large degree in Uganda, to some controversy. Critics have questioned its effectiveness in lowering HIV/AIDS transmission. They have also highlighted discrimination, gender inequality and social stigma as the outcomes of the program in Uganda.
Mutual monogamy is a form of monogamy that exists when two partners agree to be sexually active with only one another. Being in a long-term mutually monogamous relationship reduces the risk of acquiring a sexually transmitted infection (STI). It is one of the most reliable ways to avoid STIs. Those who choose mutual monogamy can be tested before the sexual relationship to be certain they are not infected. This strategy for the prevention of acquiring a sexually transmitted infection requires that each partner remain faithful and does not engage in sexual activity with another partner.
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